“Which is why, if you want something casual, that itch scratched and nothing more, you can seek me out.” He paused, and Jo could hear the echo of his earlier statements. This was not just scratching an itch, but trying to fill a square-shaped need with a round peg. It was forceful, brash, and likely not to work. He knew it. She knew it. But Jo still wished they could both just ignore it and try anyway. “But feelings? They complicate things. They make things messy. And you don’t want a mess on your hands for eternity. Stay off that path before you get too far down and stick with casual, dollface.”
Jo tensed. Careful not to dislodge his arms from around her waist, she turned to look at him, taking in the kind smile and knowing gaze. He meant well, she could tell that much. Hell, she couldn’t even tell him he was wrong. Hadn’t she been thinking the same thing about the complexity of feelings in the recreation room? And yet. . .
“You think it’s a mistake?” she whispered, barely able to get the words out for fear of what they might mean.
“I do. And don’t misunderstand,” he added hastily. “This has nothing to do with wanting you all for myself or some other nonsense. I think we covered my feelings toward you rather completely.” Her face must have conveyed her easy belief because he continued without pause. “I just don’t think you want to get entangled with anyone here romantically, least of all our leader.”
Jo ducked her head into his shoulder. So it was that obvious? She should’ve guessed. Even if it wasn’t, Wayne would know. He knew better—and more intimately—than anyone else in the Society.
“I think I’ll just. . . head out then, okay?” Jo mumbled, though she made sure to punctuate the words with a soft squeeze to his arms, making sure he knew she wasn’t upset for being turned down. Wayne squeezed back, even going so far as to place a kiss on her cheek. Jo scoffed, making a show of wiping at her face. “Gross. Didn’t you just say I shouldn’t risk sappiness with people I was stuck with for eternity?”
He merely laughed, and Jo was thankful he spared her any further harsh, but valid, advice.
“Thanks again,” Jo waved from the doorway, waiting just long enough to watch him bow, maybe a little ironically, before closing the door behind her.
She made it about halfway to her room before slowing to a stop. The idea of being alone, of stewing in her own thoughts after such a blatant realization about her feelings, made an uncomfortable sensation prickle beneath her skin. Over the past few months, when she didn’t want to be alone, she’d seek out Wayne, but this was the first time that she’d felt this odd pull in her chest after leaving him.
Hesitantly, Jo glanced down the hall, past Wayne and Samson’s rooms, to the door marked with an intricate name plate and decorated with a beautifully painted bird.
Jo started for the door before she could convince herself not to, hoping everyone had dispersed from the common area; she didn’t think she could bring herself to drag another man from the group. Nico’s room was a place she already found herself associating with safety, warmth and calm and understanding. She could watch him paint or listen to him talk, or just sit next to him and read. She wouldn’t feel guilty for going to him right now either, like she would with Takako. Out of them all, he seemed to have the clearest picture on matters of the heart.
Yet, just as she was about to knock, the man in question spun out the door, nearly bumping into her.
“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t see you there! I didn’t hit you, did I?”
“Just missed me.” Jo shifted her weight from foot to foot, trying to catch her balance after the quick dodge. “It was my fault entirely, I was the one right outside your door.”
“No harm, no foul.” Nico smiled and stepped away from the door and started down the hall toward the Four-Way. Jo hovered. She wasn’t trying to be awkward, it just sort of happened when the one place she’d been heading was now walking away from her. But Nico’s friend magic was the greatest of the group, for something compelled him to stop and look back at her, still hovering. There was a curious look about him that all too quickly turned kind and knowing. “Did you need something, Jo?”
“Oh. . .” Suddenly feeling very silly, Jo quickly shook her head. “No, I was just. . . I was. . .”Literally not doing anything at all and running from my problems, her mind finished.
“Well, then,” he said as if she had actually spoken a complete sentence and not just garbled sounds. “If you’re free, would you like to join me?”
“Where?”
“To my home.”
Chapter 20
Julia
HOME? DID SHE hear him right?
“Well, this is home. I’m going to my old home, technically,” he clarified as if reading her mind.
“Florence, you mean?”
Nico gave a nod in affirmation.
“Shouldn’t we stay here for the wish?” Samson had told her to take a mental health break, but just how much of one was really needed? “What if someone needs us?”
“We won’t be long and we won’t be using any time on our watches. Additionally, I already cleared it with Eslar.”
“Cleared it with Eslar,” she repeated. “It’s no wonder the elf has a big head, he practically runs the place.”
“Careful, or with those ears he may hear you.”
A laugh escaped her in the form of a snort. Nico’s easy way wore her down quickly. Samson had said to take a break, but all she’d done was run from one place to the next, hopelessly working herself up further. Really, she hadn’t taken that break yet, Jo decided.
