She smiled.
“Have you got more?”he asked.
“No, no, I’ve got some vegetables, but I think you and I can use them.”
“Wait, we just processed a lot of meat.Are you saying we’re not going to have any meat for our own dinner?”he asked.
The fear in his eyes at the thought of eating a vegan or vegetable rich meal, was hilarious.She managed to stifle her laugher.
“We’ve got meat.It just means you’re going to have to eat a lot of vegetables as well.”
It had been a long time since she last cooked for only two people.Cooking for the ranchers reminded her of why she wanted a large family.Her brothers had been much older than her and left home not long after they turned twenty-one.For a long time, it had been just her and her parents.
She would watch large families—brothers and sisters, families that just seemed to flourish.The strangest thing was, she had grown up in a quiet household, and she hated the quiet.She liked the noise of the ranch, the hustle and bustle of activity.
One look at Lord, and the memories came flooding back.The saddest thing was, she missed him and was still attracted to him.What did that say about her?She didn’t want to be attracted to a guy who saw her as a convenience.
“Stop it,” Lord said.
This made her jerk her head up in shock and turn to look at him.
“I was a dick, okay, but you’ve got to stop thinking about it.I didn’t mean it.I didn’t mean any of it.”
“Then why did you say it?”
****
Lord didn’t want toadmit the truth.He didn’t want Blake to know he had deep feelings for Astrid.He also didn’t want to admit it had been one of the greatest nights of his life.
Astrid coming to him, opening the door, and kissing him back.She didn’t fight him as he carried her to his favorite spot.Making love to her, feeling her virginity tear beneath the pressure of his cock.It would stay with him forever.He fucking loved the feel of her.The beauty.
She was everything.
All his life, he never had to rely on anyone.He never needed another wolf, and he didn’t even miss his family.They didn’t matter to him.He’d been a recluse.For the first time, someone else mattered.Astrid mattered to him, but the real truth was, she had mattered to him all those years ago with her head in a book.That was why he kept going to the library, to catch brief glimpses of her to know she was all right.He wanted to take care of her.To protect her.And he wasn’t used to feeling any of this.He felt ...weak.Useless.
But he hated Astrid’s silence so damn much.She had turned her back on him and started to work at the dishes.He clenched his hands into fists.
Blake had told him to just start speaking the truth.To be real with Astrid.He wasn’t used to opening up to anyone.
Getting to his feet, he closed the distance between them and placed his hands on her hips.He expected her to push him away, but she didn’t.She did go tense in his arms, not that he could blame her.He had to earn back her trust, and he knew that was going to take time.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
“Stop, Lord.”
“No, I’m not going to stop.You’re not a convenience to me, Astrid.”He pressed his lips against her temple.“You have no fucking idea what you mean to me, and I am sorry you had to listen to me being an asshole.Blake’s my friend, but I didn’t want him to know how ...special that night meant to me.How, even now, I can feel your sweet cunt wrapped around my dick, and all I want to do is drive inside you, over and over again, and not stop.”
Her heard her soft whimper.
Mine.
He smelled her attraction.
“Please leave me alone,” she said.
He heard the desperate plea in her voice, and he wanted to ignore it and just feel her against him.It felt good to have her in his arms, but that wouldn’t be building trust.That would just be taking what he wanted.He was not going to do that to her.
Against his very will, he let her go but didn’t leave.He grabbed a towel and started to dry the dishes.She didn’t tell him to leave, and he considered that a breakthrough.
