That's right. I'd just lost my temper.
"I cannot believe that you two have the absolute fucking nerve to judge me when you haven't had the best past relationships either." I swung around toward D.J. "You are damn lucky you have Letitia and you take it for granted that she loves your thick skull as it is. And you," I said, looking at Robert again. "You made mistakes with Corey's mom and I never held it against you. Was I disappointed about your choices? Yes, but you're my brother and I love you so I never judged you. If I want to be careful in my relationship with the man I love, I'm allowed to do that without worrying about what your two cents will be! We went from a one-night stand, to friends, to married in three months. I didn't want him to feel trapped or obligated or anything else because I love him and it wouldn't be right for me to expect him to feel the same in such a short time!" The tears started then, tears of anger and frustration, and sadness, because I wasn't sure J.J. would ever feel the same about me that I did about him. "But you promised me that you wouldn't say anything about it and then you went and announced it in front of everyone, so thank you very much!" I shouted. For good measure, I grabbed one of the throw pillows from the couch and flung it at Robert's head.
Then, I left the room because I was so mad, I couldn't see straight.
I was also mortified. Humiliated.
Not by my brothers, though God knew they had the ability to embarrass me more than even my parents. No, I'd done all that myself. I'd screamed curses at my brothers in front of my in-laws, my employers, and worst of all, J.J. I'd thrown something at Robert and basically told D.J. he was a shitty husband.
Oh, and let's not forget I'd yelled out that J.J. was the man I loved more than once. After admitting we'd had a one-night stand.
What a brilliant way to begin a family gathering to celebrate my new daughter with my husband.
I stumbled into my old bedroom and shut the door behind me. Then, I collapsed on the bed and cried.
I heard the door open and the edge of the bed depress.
"I'm sorry, Mom," I sobbed. "I'm so sorry."
"I'm sure your mom will be glad to hear that," J.J. said.
I squeaked and rolled over while simultaneously scooting toward the other side of the bed. J.J. grabbed my waist, yanking me back toward him.
"Careful, you nearly fell off," he said.
I stopped resisting then and let my body relax into the bed. I was still crying and sniffling. J.J. glanced around, spotted the box of tissues on the nightstand, and grabbed it. I took one and wiped my eyes and nose.
"I'm sorry," I said to him. "I'm so embarrassed. This is why I hate to lose my temper. I say terrible things and yell and it's horrible."
J.J. reached out, his hand pausing when I flinched away, but he brushed my hair away from my face anyway.
"It's the first time I've seen you yell like that since you were a kid," he admitted. "And I have to admit I'm going to do my level best never to piss you off that bad."
I don't know how I managed to laugh and cry at the same time, but I pulled it off somehow.
"It's not always this crazy and you know it," I mumbled.
"It's okay to get mad sometimes, Lee. And it's okay to make mistakes. Though I hope you won't be too upset if I say that I hope our daughter inherits my temperament."
I laughed again and it was a little less watery. "I hope so, too."
I covered my face with my tissue. "I can't believe I acted like that in front of Cam and Sierra. And your parents! God, what on earth are they going to think of me now?"
J.J. moved my hands away from my face so he could look at me. "My parents probably think that you're a human being, a pregnant one at that, and they'll cut you some slack. As for Cam and Sierra, I'm pretty sure the only thing they wanted during that scene was some popcorn. They've heard so many stories about the Prescott boys and their shenanigans, but they didn't know about your temper."
"Think I'll still have a job tonight?" I asked.
J.J. laughed. "Oh, yeah. They're going to keep you around just for potential entertainment value because they'll never know when you're going to blow again."
I sighed and used a fresh tissue to blow my nose. "Great, now they think I'm a ticking time bomb."
"There is something you said that we need to discuss," J.J. stated.
I froze, unable to move or breathe, because I knew what he was going to bring up. Still, I waited in silence. I'd said the words. I couldn't take them back. It wouldn't be right.
I had to accept his response and hope that it didn't crush me.
"We agreed to be more open and honest with each other, Lee," he said. "But I think we're both guilty of holding back our thoughts and feelings."
