“I thought I’d surprise you before the gala. I bought you something and it’s—they’re back at my place but… I don’t want you to think I have any motives other than I want to make you happy. I want to spoil you.” He looks so pained, I want to slip off my seat belt and slide onto his lap. Maybe that would be fine on a private plane during takeoff, but maybe not and I’m not going to risk it.
“I know you only have good intentions,” I say.
He nods. “It’s true.”
“Then tell me.”
“I bought you something to wear tonight. And I’ve arranged for hair and makeup people to come to the house.”
I swallow down the mix of emotions. I understand why he was doubting himself.
“I didn’t do it because I thought you needed… dressing or fixing or because?—”
“Because you didn’t think I’d have anything appropriate to wear to a New York gala night, because I’m from Star Falls.” A niggle of discomfort gnaws at me. We both know I don’t fit in his world. But dresses and makeup aren’t going to bridge the gap.
“That’s really not what I was thinking.”
Jack’s not a liar. I believe that wasn’t his conscious intention. But maybe there was a part of him, buried. Subconscious. That doesn’t believe I’ll fit in to his world unless I change.
I can’t blame him for thinking that. Because honestly, sitting on this plane, flying to New York for twenty-four hours, that’s exactly what I’m thinking.
“You have a picture of the dress?” I ask. I don’t want to make this moment more uncomfortable than it already is. Jack has tried to do something nice. I don’t want to throw that back in his face.
“You don’t have to wear any of them,” he says.
I tilt my head to the side. “Any of them? There are multiple outfits?”
“I wanted you to have a choice.”
I roll my eyes, amused and I hold out my hand for his phone. “Show me.”
He brings up some pictures. The first is a sugar-pink strapless dress with a fitted bodice and a full skirt that looks almost like a long tutu. It’s beautiful. The next shot is the same dress from the back. It’s elegant and pretty at the same time. There’s no way anyone couldn’t like it.
I glance up at Jack and he’s looking at me, nervously. I swipe the image to the next dress. It’s long and black, with a silver belt and a halter neck. The back shows that the ties from the halter fall down the back of the dress, which is backless. It’s very elegant. Perhaps a little more sophisticated than the first. Then the third is strapless again. It’s blue and ruched on the bodice, which comes down to just below the bottom, and then there’s a full skirt. It looks like someone put a sweater over a prom dress. I don’t like it.
I swipe to the next image and it’s various bags and shoes. They are all beautiful and look way too expensive.
I slide the phone back toward Jack.
“Did you like any of them?” he asks.
Of course I like them. It would be impossible not to.
“They’re all beautiful. Which one was your favorite?” I ask him. I have no idea what the right choice is. He’s the best person to make the decision here.
“I think you’d look beautiful in all of them. But you’ll look beautiful no matter what you wear.”
“I’ll wear what you want me to wear,” I say without bitterness. I’ll do anything Jack wants me to. I’ll wear whatever he likes. I know he thinks I feel uncomfortable, but I wonder if he’s just as uncomfortable taking a girl like me out in New York.
“I want you to wear whatyouwant to wear. If you want to wear jeans and a Snoopy t-shirt, that’s fine with me.”
I pause for a beat. “But is it? Honestly? Presumably there will be people at this gala who you know. And I’ll be there as your date. You surely want me to look a certain way. You don’t want me to be wearing my Wilde’s Farm baseball cap, do you?”
Jack scrunches up his face and presses the heels of his hands over his eyes. “This is exactly what I didn’t want. I wanted to spoil you. And you see it as me being embarrassed by you. That’s not true. I don’t care what other people think of me. Or you. I know who I am and I know who you are. That’s the important thing.”
I want what he’s saying to be true. I think he believes it is. I just don’t think it’s real life. “It’s natural to want me to fit in. I get it. I did bring a dress, but it’s not as beautiful as the ones in the pictures.”
He shakes his head. “I really wish I’d never bought them. It was a stupid idea. I’ve never had a girlfriend who I wanted to spoil before. This is new territory for me. And I’m fucking it up. I’m sorry.”
