“That’s what kids are supposed to do,” Dad says. “They leave the nest. And if they don’t, then the parents haven’t been doing their jobs properly. After Mom died, I wanted to keep you close. I wanted to protect you from everything. But now? Now I just want you to be happy.”
“We are happy, right?” Bray asks, looking at me.
“Even if you don’t want to, Iris needs to spread her wings,” Dad says.
Tears gather in my eyes. Not because I’ve just been fired by my dad, but because he’s saying things I haven’t even allowed myself to think about.
“Iris never wanted to go to college, either.”
I meet my dad’s gaze. We both know that’s not true.
“No,” Dad says. “Iris couldn’t go to ballet school because she dropped out of high school to make sure this family didn’t go under.”
I exhale. The time after Mom died is never something we discuss. It was so dark and felt so hopeless that we were all on autopilot. And the word ballet has never been uttered in this house since Mom died, either. It feels like we’ve been keeping all this in and holding it so tightly, that it’s a relief to let go. Finally.
“Knowing that you’ve done your high school diploma without telling me…” My dad shakes his head. “I realized how blind and selfish I’ve been. Maybe that was forgivable just after your mom died. But I should have fired you a long time ago.”
I nudge my dad. “You can’t fire us, Dad. We’re going to help you transform this business into a national frozen fruit brand.”
Dad pats my arm again. “Maybe Bray is. But you’re not, my darling. You are going to go and be with that man who looks at you like you just hung the moon.”
I blink back my tears and shake my head. “No, Dad,” I force out. “No, I’m not. Jack ended things and went back to New York.”
Bray groans. “We need him to advise on the freezing business. He had some great ideas.”
“Don’t be an insensitive asshole, Bray,” Dad growls. “Iris is upset. She’s had her heart broken. Let me tell you, son. Broken hearts don’t heal easily. But now you don’t have a job. Maybe you can go to New York City and find him.” He sighs. “I should probably tell you that I know you’ve been going there every year since forever.”
I pull back. “What?”
Dad shrugs. “I should have said something. I wanted to respect your privacy. If I’d thought about it, I would have realized you were going to the ballet. Seeing what you missed out on.”
It’s almost too much to hear from him, and I cover my face, trying to stop my tears from falling. “It’s where I met Jack,” I blurt out. Loss envelops me. But not the loss of ballet from my life. Or even my mother. It’s Jack I miss in that moment.
“You need to go and find him,” Dad says.
“I don’t want to leave you. Or this asshole here.” I nod toward Bray.
“We’re going to be just fine. And we’ll always be here when you come back.”
I shake my head. “I’m not going anywhere.”
“Maybe not right away,” Dad says. “But you need to figure out where your future lies.”
Where would I go? Star Falls is all I’ve known. There’s no possibility of me chasing after a dream of dancing. That dream is long dead. And Jack? He’s gone. He has his hands full with his dad, and even if he didn’t, I’m never going to fit into his world and he never asked me to try. He always said he was sure there was going to be a way through for us. But I wonder if he really believed it.
I’ll never know. I need to move forward. Maybe I’ll figure out a different dream for myself. Maybe I’ll figure out that being in Star Falls is exactly what I want.
Dad hooks his arms around both of us and pulls us into a hug. I can’t remember the last time he hugged me. “You’re good kids. I’m a lucky man. Your mom would be so proud of you both.”
I glance across at Bray and tears are gathering in his eyes. I grab his hand and squeeze, trying to breathe as my own tears fall. I miss her so much.
“This is what she’d want,” Dad says, his voice tight. “I bet she’s up there laughing now, telling me it’s about freaking time I let y’all lead your own lives.”
I lean my head on Dad’s chest and let the warmth of him soak into me.
The idea of being free from Wilde’s Farm is terrifying. But there’s a glimmer of light, a star in a dark Colorado sky that whispers that it’s exactly what I’m meant to be—free and in control of my own destiny.
THIRTY-SIX
