Nico leans down, kissing me softly, and I close my eyes, moaning shamelessly as he presses into me, opening me up. With a deep exhale, I relax my body, coaxing him deeper until our hips are flush. I forget about everything else as he picks up the pace, driving into me with powerful thrusts. My fingers dig into his back. I’m desperate for more, and he gives me everything. It’s fast and filthy, full of grunts and groans, desperate kisses, and deep, hard fucking. It’s an intense affirmation of us, and it doesn’t take long before I’m at the edge, ready to come.
With one powerful thrust, he buries himself deep in my body, and I shatter into a million tiny pieces, cum splashing across my chest with each pulse of my release. Nico’s choked-off gasp fills the room as his hips lose their rhythm, and his body shudders through his own climax.
I collapse onto the mattress, wrung out but deeply satisfied, and glide my fingertips along his back as his hips slow and finally stop. He hovers over me, panting for air, eyes closed, and he’s never looked more beautiful. Exhausted, but feeling better than I have in far too long, I gently wipe the sweat from his brow. “Good?”
He pushes himself sideways and collapses next to me, resting a shaky hand on my thigh. “So good.” Covering his hand with mine, I roll onto my side, nestling into the crook of his shoulder. I close my eyes and savor the safety of his arms around me. I don’t want to lose this closeness we’re creating. This life I could have. I want it too much.
“Bello, is everything alright?” His gentle fingers work through my hair, lightly massaging my scalp.
I sigh and press even closer, weighing my answer. He stays quiet, letting me think without pressure. In my life, there haven’t been many people who cared for me. There were even fewer who loved me. Most loved what I could do for them. Or what I could help them achieve. It made me hard. Aggressive. More focused on the reward than the request. But that’s who I was. Who someone else made me. And I want to leave that behind. I want more of what I have now with Nico. “Will you help me with something?”
He stills for a moment, surely shocked by my request. “Yes. Always.”
He doesn’t even know what it is, and yet he’s willing to agree to whatever I ask. I don’t deserve him. “When I was very young, I recall softness. Kisses and hugs. Comfort when I hurt. It’s more shadows of memories than anything. Then with the Shabah there was—well, not that. And that soft boy changed to survive. And I grew into a jaded, cynical man with a questionable conscience and probably faulty moral compass. It’s what kept me alive. It’s the only life I knew. And then I met you.” His soft gray eyes are full of acceptance and the love he has for me, and I want to do better. “I don’t want that life anymore. I want to be the person you see in me.” He tightens his embrace, squeezing me to his chest, and we lie in silence again, long enough that I wonder if he fell asleep. I pull back to check and am blown away by his intense gaze. It’s full of awe and love. For me.
“I have to admit that when I did not hear from you for so long, I thought maybe your old life had seduced you. Pulled you back. Or I had pushed you there.”
Raising up on my elbows, I shake my head. “No. Never. I’m so sorry I made you worry.” I settle against him again, needing his arms around me. Founder, who have I become? “How about spring?”
“Spring for what?” His voice is shaky.
“Marry me in the spring, love. Everything will be blooming then. The gardens will be lovely. Or we could get married in the vineyard at home. Whatever you want.”
I risk a glance at his face. He’s smiling softly, his eyes crinkling at the corners, and it’s the most adorable thing I’ve ever seen. “I would like that. Yes. Spring is perfect.” He runs his hands along my arms, his excitement growing. “Panah City would be nice. My father would like that.”
“If that’s what you want, then we’ll be married here, in spring.” I kiss him softly. “Whateveryou want, I want to give that to you.“ And I truly mean it.
“That is easy. To be with you. Forever. I do not know what your plan is after Keller is gone, but I would like to help you accomplish it. I want to support you however I can.”
I caress his cheek. “You are a treasure. Fate smiled on me the day we met.”
Nico tucks me against his side, softly stroking my arm with his fingertips. “Doyou have any plans? For after?”
I ready myself for the worst but still hope that what I say next won’t ruin everything. “I want to remake The Brotherhood. Rebuild it, but with changes. I can’t tearit down and walk away. To dismantle everything would leave a hole in the political structure of Amagi and make us vulnerable to any nascent dictators. We don’t need to dangle that temptation in front of them. Do you agree?”
Nico considers the situation for a moment, and I appreciate that he doesn’t reject my idea outright. Eventually, he nods and kisses my temple. “I do agree. And leaving a guild-full of assassins without direction would lead to more trouble. So, what changes would you make?”
My answer is swift and vehement. “No more acquiring children. No more children in the ranks at all.” My voice is tight and my body is tense. “The training is harsh. And there’s no escape. Where would they go? To live on the streets and be scooped up again? To orphanages filled with children who are so foreign in their sweetness that the Shade can’t adjust?”
After taking a deep breath and exhaling, I continue a bit more calmly. “That path isn’t necessary. You’re a prime example of what can be accomplished with adults who have a natural talent and a desire to learn. So we take recruits who want to be there, perhaps as young adults, and we train them hard, every day. It would be more like an elite group of Protectors, rather than a clandestine organization working for the highest bidder, existing outside the government.”
I glance at Nico, carefully watching his expression. “I would also change the rules regarding relationships. Everyone should be free to find love if they are lucky enough. If we alter the guidelines, add something detailing what the Shabah would or wouldn’t do in cases of threatened orkidnapped family members, we could get around the issue altogether.”
Nico wraps his arms around me, as if trying to protect me, which is ridiculous. I don’t need protection. “Those are big changes, Bello. Are you so sure the Brotherhood will allow you to live, let alone take over and change so much of what they know?”
There’s worry in his voice, and it’s not unfounded. Although I do want change, I can’t give them room to question me on this. At least at first. When an organization is used to taking orders without question, giving the rank and file the free reign to question the changes is dangerous. I’ll have to walk a fine line, but it’s possible. “Yes. Once they learn that I’m the one who has assassinated multiple high-ranking members of the Guild—people who came through the ranks as I did—it will earn me respect and prestige within the organization. Anyone who would stand against me will be eliminated, excluding Lorenzo. But he won’t have any supporters within the Guild and will be much less of a threat. I’ll elevate House Durov and appoint Elanil as my second in command. I’ll be Grand Master, of course.”
Nico grins. “Not The Revenant?”
I shake my head. “That’s a bit dramatic, even for me.”
“So, will you keep the two parts of the Guild separate?”
That’s been something I’ve gone back and forth on. “Yes, at first. But eventually, the Shabah should come out into the open and merge with the Protectors. I have ideas.” I push up onto my elbows. “Will you help me? Takecontrol of our business ventures? Help me train the new recruits?”
The surprise on Nico’s face turns to happiness. “Yes. I would love to. We will do this together.” He pulls me into a soft kiss, the smile still on his lips. “You know, that means we should consider a permanent move to Panah City. We could live here with my father. Visit Oht for holidays.”
I laugh. “Or we could get our own home here. But first things first. We need to eliminate Keller and implement the reorganization.” I kiss him again, glad I told him my ideas and happy to have his blessing. “Then we can make our plans.” I crawl on top of him and straddle his waist, wiggling my hips. “Right now, though, I’d like to hear you gasp a few more times.”
