“To think, we could have been doing that for years,” Riley said, his words a whisper in the quiet room.
“I wonder when we should have started,” Josh thought out loud. “Like, when should we have figured this out, you know?”
Riley shook with silent laughter, his energy not restored enough to make actual noise.
“It wouldn’t have been the same if we were each other’s first. Nothing to compare it to. We might not have realized how amazing we were together. Not enough experience to make it good.”
“Maybe. I keep trying to figure out when I started loving you,” Josh said, his voice wistful.
“You think of anything?”
Josh smiled against his face. He was far too close for Riley to make out his blurry features, but he had memorized every one of those details years ago.
“Do you remember when you punched that random kid from the neighborhood in the face ’cause he called me names?”
Riley sputtered. “That’s when you fell in love with me? We were like nine years old. I can’t even remember that guy’s name. He went to private school or something.”
“No, not then,” Josh said, laughing. “It was in seventh grade when we ran into him again and you apologized to him because you realized hurting people is bad. But you told him he was still a dumb fucking asshole. That’s when I fell in love. I wasn’t a fighter and I didn’t want you to fight anyone else. I never wanted to see you get hurt, especially over me.
“When I pictured us as grownups who’d lived long fruitful lives to the old age of forty, since we didn’t quite understand age yet, it was us together in our own place. I always figured there were women somewhere else in the house or something. But it was just us, with kids running around. I never realized they wereourkids, or that it was weird that we were cuddling in this fantasy. I mean, we cuddle all the time. But I’ve always been happiest in your arms. Nowhere else. Always.”
Riley pulled away enough so he could see Josh clearly.
“You want to have kids with me one day?”
Josh's smile stretched from ear to ear as he answered, “Hell yeah, I do. You’d be such a good dad. A good husband.”
Riley had already melted into the mattress after that session of amazing sex, but this was like the whipped cream on top of his hot cocoa. He hadn’t thought life with Josh could get better, but it always did.
“You’d be an amazing dad. I can’t wait to have that with you,” Riley said as he leaned forward and planted a quick kiss on Josh’s lips.
“We have to decide how to get one of us pregnant. I’ve been looking into thosempregnovels Cole mentioned.”
Riley pulled farther away from Josh. “Uhh, you know that’s just in fiction, right? We can’t actually get pregnant. We could adopt or find a surrogate or something.”
Josh blinked at him, and his eyes widened. “Of course, yeah. I was totally joking.”
Riley chuckled as he pulled Josh against him. He’d never let go of this man. Josh would always behishimbo.
31
A COUPLE DAYS LATER, Riley and Josh were gathered at Cole and Elena’s place. Cole had moved into Elena’s house earlier that month, and they’d invited Josh and Riley over to watch football and “share some big news,” whatever that meant. With Cole, no one ever knew what to expect.
They were going to have a low-key night watching NFL playoffs with lots of food, so Riley and Josh figured it would be a good time to let Cole and Elena know they were officially dating.
When Riley and Josh walked in with foil pans filled with multi-flavored wings, Cole and Elena were turning the giant coffee table into a smorgasbord of finger foods.
Cole’s dog, Wrigley, darted toward them to say a quick hello. He received pats from both Josh and Riley and ran back toward the food. The retriever would be onclean-up duty tonight and would take care of any messes for them. Josh and Riley found a spot on the table for their wings next to nachos, dips and soft pretzels.
“Are you ready for some football?” Josh sang loudly to the room, eliciting cheers from their friends.
They had some time to eat before the game officially started, and Josh settled on the big sectional couch next to Riley. The couch fit all of them snugly around the coffee table, making for the perfect viewing experience. There was plenty of room for more, but Abby and Emilio were off traveling the world, while Avery and Hailey were stuck going to a family function. Who planned events during football games?
Josh raised his eyebrows in Riley’s direction, silently asking if it was the right time to tell them that he and Riley were officially official.
Riley smiled and nodded in response, then cleared his throat.
“Hey, we have a bit of an announcement,” he said, drawing everyone’s attention.
