“Welcome, everyone, to the surprise wedding of Avery and Hailey,” Cole began. A couple gasps could be heard. Apparently some people were still guessing at what was happening. “I’m absolutely honored to be marrying two of my best friends tonight, but not marrying them myself because it turns out they’re not into the poly thing. The three of us could have been so happy together, but I know just the love that the two ofthem share will be enough as well as legal in the state of New Jersey.”
Avery and Hailey both giggled at Cole’s antics and Avery released one of Hailey’s hands to pat Cole on the back while he said, “Sorry, man.”
Cole wiped at a fake tear before continuing. “It’s cool, Avery. I’m so happy to see you two finally find each other. And,” he looked to either side where each of the rest of their friends were standing, “we really do mean finally. These two met over fifteen years ago in an English class while also crossing paths at soccer, something they still enjoy together for the greatest indoor team in all of South Jersey, the Cherry Stems. To see us live, check out the Marlton facility next Tuesday night at seven.”
Hailey turned to Cole and raised an eyebrow at his shameless plug.
“Right. The wedding,” he continued. “Anyone who has seen these two together knows they are perfect for each other. I remember way back in our senior year of high school after a particularly eventful soccer party.” Avery closed his eyes and dropped his head for a moment, muttering, “Jesus Christ,” under his breath so only Hailey and Cole could hear. Cole continued, “That’s right, buddy. I didn’t forget it. Avery and I were on one side of someone’s backyard watching Hailey, Abby and Elena kicking around a ball. Not, in like, acreepy way. But, look at them, they’re all beautiful. Anyway, we were watching and I turned to Avery and asked him if he would ever finally ask out Hailey. She was dating some nobody at the time. But, I remember he turned to me and said, with the straightest face, ‘One day I will.’ And I asked him when. And he said, ‘When she’s ready to marry me, because I won’t be able to take anything less.’”
Hailey took a sharp inhale and tried blinking away the sudden onslaught of tears while she heard a bunch of people around her say, “Aww.”
“Now, you may be wondering, ‘Cole, how could you possibly remember that?’ Well, after he said that, I asked him to say it one more time so I could type it into my phone verbatim. I wanted to make sure I had it when my best man speech came around.”
Cole got some more laughs, especially because everyone knew he was being serious.
Avery piped up. “Should I mention what we talked about after that?”
Cole’s attention snapped over to Avery and leveled him with a glare.
“No need. Moving on.” He cleared his throat. “Since then, we’ve all been waiting. We all knew it was just a matter of time. You see, Hailey and Avery are like a flowerbed, and their love is the manure that creates a beautiful garden of flowers.”
Hailey and Avery glanced toward Cole, and Hailey said, “Really? Manure?”
“Would you have preferred me to say you’re like a roomba and Avery was the piece of dirt you’ve been searching for your whole life? Because that was the backup.”
Everyone laughed around them but Hailey heard a deep gasp and looked behind her to where Elena looked like she had seen a ghost. Cole seemed to suck his lips between his teeth for a moment, but then he kept going.
“I didn’t think so. So, Hailey, would you like to say your vows first?”
She took a deep breath and let it out, gathering courage before speaking in front of so many people. The only person that mattered was Avery so she focused on him.
“Avery, I’m sorry it took us so long to find each other. A part of me wishes that we got together years ago, but I think life worked out the way it was supposed to. There is no happiness without suffering and I don’t think I would have appreciated you nearly as much if I didn’t realize how good I have it with you. I, maybe, could have gone with alittleless suffering, but it is what it is. And I’m so happy that I have you now. You’re everything to me. My best friend, my rock, my source of light. My life always had you in it, but it’s so much better having you be the center of my world. Ilove you.”
Avery rubbed his thumbs across Hailey’s hands where he held them and mouthed “I love you” back to Hailey.
“Avery, you’re up,” Cole prompted.
He cleared his throat and gave Hailey’s hands an extra squeeze.
“Hailey. You are the love of my life and you have been for nearly as long as I’ve known you, before I even knew what love was. You have the most beautiful soul and everything you touch is better than you left it. Your kindness, your generosity, your heart. Cole wasn’t lying when I said I knew I wanted to marry you when we were in high school. You’re my dream woman and we fit together in the best way. I don’t regret taking our time to find each other because you are worth the wait. I would have waited longer, but I’m reallyreallyglad I didn’t have to. I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you. I love you so much.”
A loud horn noise broke out and Hailey and Avery turned to see Cole blowing his nose with tears in his eyes. Abby let go of the hand she was holding so she could hold up a wastebasket for him to throw the used tissue.Man, they really prepared everything.
“That was so beautiful. All of us have witnessed true love here today,” Cole said as he placed his hands on Hailey and Avery’s shoulders. “Time to exchange the rings. Josh, do you have them.”
Hailey peered behind Avery at Josh who had a sour look on his face.
He gave a stage whisper to Cole. “Dude, I told you what to call me. You have to stay with the theme of the party.”
Cole looked pained as he looked at Josh with regret. “I’m so sorry. You’re right. Way to stay in character. As I was saying, may we now receive an offering from the lord of the rings.”
Josh beamed and everyone laughed as he stepped forward and presented Hailey and Avery’s rings with a flourish. They took turns adding the hoop to each other’s ring fingers as Cole led them through their “I do’s.”
“By the power vested in me by the internet, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride.”
Hailey and Avery moved toward each other and met in a bruising kiss as she leaned back and let her new husband dip her. Everyone around them cheered and applauded as they finished their kiss but kept their foreheads pressed together.
“Now, ladies and gentlemen, we’ll have Hailey and Avery have their first dance as husband and wife and then it’s time to party!” Cole shouted above the din.
