He wanted to hold her hand forever, but he forced himself to let go once she was properly in the carriage. Her chaperone followed behind her. It wasn’t long before they were off.
The ball was at Thornbush Hall, which was home to the Countess of Thornbush. She was known for hosting some of the most lavish balls of the Season, and it was a huge honor to receive an invitation from her.
Evan had to use some of his influence with her to get her to invite Joanna, but it was worth it. Tonight was the perfect night to announce his courtship to society. He looked at Joanna, who was gently wringing her gloved hands in her lap. “Are you ready?”
She shook her head. “I don’t know if I will ever be ready,” she confessed. “What if I freeze again and can’t speak? Like I did at the dress shop.”
“You will not,” he said. “I think you will surprise yourself tonight. And if it becomes too much, then I will be at your side. Just tell me and we can leave early.”
She smiled and shook her head as she gazed at him.
The affection and happiness in her eyes made him want to kiss her. . He wasn’t used to anyone looking at him like that, except maybe his grandmother. “What is it?” he asked, careful to keep his tone neutral.
“I just can’t help but wonder why you don’t want to truly court a lady. You are quite wonderful at it, you know.”
He looked out the window. “It is complicated,” he admitted.
“Of course. Forgive me. I let my mouth run away with me.”
There are other activities that the mouth could be of use for.
The thought came unbidden to his mind, and he clenched his jaw. It was better if he had his usual scowl on his face than betray the sudden waves of uncontrollable lust that occasionally sprang upon him when he was in her presence.
No other lady made him lose control like this. Control in all aspects of his life was something that he craved, that he needed. But with Joanna, the thought of losing it wasn’t quite so terrifying.
CHAPTER 18
Lively music from a string quartet reached her ears as the carriage slowed to a stop outside Thornbush Manor. Joanna’s heart started beating faster, from nerves, but also excitement. She felt like she was a debutant again, attending her very first ball.
In a way, tonight was like a debut. She had all but disappeared from society for three years after her family fell into disgrace. Now, not only would she make an appearance while dressed as a duchess, but she would be on the arm of the Duke of Blackwell. They would certainly be giving thetonsomething to talk about. She was just happy that, for once, they would be saying positive things about her instead of the usual nasty rumors.
Evan helped her out of the carriage. Mary left after them to head to the servants’ entrance. She would be spending some time in the servant’s quarters until it was time for them to leave. After all, they would not need a chaperone in such a public place.
Joanna took his arm, and they walked slowly up to the manor. She took deep breaths as they entered the ballroom. The large, spacious room was filled with couples who danced on the polished, hardwood floor. Chandeliers lit up the room, bathing the guests in a cheerful yellow glow. The music carried on as normal as they were announced, but it felt like everyone stopped to stare at them. She kept a cordial smile on her face as they walked through the crowd of people whispering.
“Is that?—”
“No, it can’t be. Her father is practically destitute.”
“I heard he owes money to every gambling hall in England!”
“How on earth did she earn the affections of the Duke of Blackwell?”
“Perhaps she found a way to blackmail him. There is something off about him. Everyone knows it. I would not be surprised if she uncovered a secret that he would rather stay hidden.”
Joanna clenched her jaw in anger and tried to look around for the last speaker, but she could not find them in the crowd of faces. How dare they speak so poorly of Evan?
The more time she spent with him, the more she knew he was nothing like his reputation. He might appear cold, but he was really incredibly kind.
“Let them talk,” he murmured to her. “By the end of the night, you will have charmed them so much that they will have forgotten they said such awful things about you.”
She looked up at him to see he wasn’t looking at her. Instead, he stared off into space, scowling. “I can forgive them for what they say about me, Your Grace,” she said. “I expected as much. I just wish they wouldn’t say such horrible things about you.”
He looked at her, perplexed. “About me?”
“Someone dared say your character is not impeccable. That you have secrets I could blackmail you with.” She felt absolutely indignant at the thought.
His expression softened for a moment before he looked away. “Do not worry about that. Their opinion of me matters little.”
