“I do not think you or Lizzy would compare you to Mr Collins,” he replied with open amusement.
“If she should, I would hope to be judged favourably against such a man,” Mr Darcy replied with a grimace. He looked thoughtful for a moment before saying quietly, “I…I do have hopes. Honourable hopes. But I do not believe she has the same hopes of me.”
“No,” Mr Bennet agreed. “I fancy she does not. You mis-stepped rather badly with her upon your first meeting, but after all you and the other men have done for us and all the families of the neighbourhood, I have no doubt she considers you a friend now. Still, my Lizzy is a sensible girl, and we all know that men of your sphere rarely look to ladies of ours for any noble purpose.”
Mr Darcy’s face reddened. “I have recently come to understand that my behaviour in the early weeks of my stay in Hertfordshire was not well-mannered.” He stood and began to pace. “Since that time, I have learnt she cares nothing at all for my wealth and connexions, and have improved in my manners. Your daughter granted me her friendship only after I proved myself to be of good character. I can only hope to improve further, until I am worthy of her heart, as well.”
To say that Mr Bennet was shocked by this speech would dreadfully understate the case. He had suspected a preference for his dear Lizzy on this young man’s part, and had entertained himself with the notion that he might, perhaps, even propose, without ever supposing it to be at all likely. But to hear this outpouring of self-castigation, to witness the evidence of changes wrought so unconsciously by his own darling daughter upon this great man, why, it was entirely extraordinary.
In the end, he stood and offered the younger man his hand. “There is no man in the world truly worthy of my Lizzy, sir, but if you are able to win her, I expect I might enjoy calling you ‘son’.”
Mr Darcy accepted the offered hand and replied, “Thank you, sir. I would be honoured to be addressed so.”
“Well, well,” said Mr Bennet, somewhat abashed. “Go on now and join my Lizzy in the parlour. I shall be along presently.” With a bow, the young gentleman exited, and Bennet was left to contemplate the possibility of his dear girl removing to Derbyshire.
* * *
Upon entering the parlour, Darcy was immediately accosted by Mr Collins, who in the intervening days had concocted several new but no more rational reasons why Lady Catherine should be allowed to determine Darcy’s marital fate. He bore it with all the patience he could muster, for he did not wish to reinforce early opinions on the subject of his manners by being overtly rude to any member of Elizabeth’s family, though the ridiculous parson was making it very difficult indeed. He was the recipient of a great many sympathetic glances from the others in the company, but none felt themselves equal to rescuing him until his sister stood, with a resolute expression, and crossed the room to take her place at his side.
In hopes of an ally, Mr Collins immediately turned to her and exclaimed, “Miss Darcy! I cannot imagine that you would be in disagreement with your most estimable and perspicacious aunt on the desirability of a union between Pemberley and Rosings.”
Darcy glared at the man and then looked at his sister worriedly as surprise, combined with her natural diffidence, seemed to render her incapable of speech. Then she rallied, and taking a deep breath replied, “I am of the opinion, sir, that it is better to unite people than houses. I would wish above all things for my brother to be happy in marriage, and neither Cousin Anne nor Rosings would make him so.”
“Oh, bravo, Miss Darcy!” Bingley cried as the parson sputtered. “You have said it perfectly—‘better to unite people than houses’! I shall have to remember that.”
As the Bennet ladies murmured their agreement, Mr Collins regained his breath and again addressed Georgiana. “But Miss Darcy, surely—”
“Enough,” Darcy interjected firmly. “I have allowed you to importune me on this distasteful subject, but I will not permit you to subject my sister to a similar inquisition. Console my aunt as best you can, Mr Collins, but I will not be moved, nor will I further discuss the matter with anyone so wholly unrelated to me.”
He took his sister’s arm and led her back to her friends, seating himself next to her and leaving the clergyman standing stupidly near the door.
“How much longer does he stay?” he whispered to the Bennet ladies, sending Lydia into a fit of giggles and causing the others and his sister to hide their smiles behind their hands.
“Two days,” Elizabeth whispered back. “Two excruciating days. We shall not blame you if you do not call again until he is gone.”
Darcy shook his head. “I think I might find within myself the fortitude to bear his company for so short a time, under such an inducement as the other company to be found here.”
“I do not suppose you could lend some of that fortitude to me?” Elizabeth replied, her expression droll.
“Cousin Elizabeth,” Mr Collins said sternly, approaching the group, “whispering is not genteel.”
“Neither is badgering a guest about a personal matter which affects you not at all,” Elizabeth replied tartly. When her youngest sisters could not restrain their laughter, Darcy saw Mr Collins grow red with affront.
“I begin to feel that I have had a fortunate escape in your irrational refusal of my most eligible offers,” he declared in a tone of great offence.
“Lizzy felt she had a fortunate escape the moment she said ‘no’,” Miss Lydia commented.
Mr Collins turned positively purple. He leant over the back of the settee, forcing Miss Bennet and Bingley to press themselves against the arms to avoid contact, and shook his finger in Miss Lydia’s face. “Listen here, you little monstrosity—”
“Mr Collins!” roared Mr Bennet from the doorway. Every head whipped around to face him. He stepped into the room.
“I have warned you before about showing my daughters the proper respect. You are no longer welcome in my home. Pack your things, and I shall have you conveyed to the post station. Our association is at an end.”
Mr Collins looked about the room, and all of its occupants looked back in undisguised disgust. He ostentatiously straightened his jacket and looked down his nose at the daughters of the house. “When I inherit Longbourn, you may expect from me no more civility and consideration than you have displayed today.”
Bingley jumped to his feet and proclaimed, “They will not require it! It would be my honour to care for all the family when Mr Bennet dies—may he live to be a hundred!”
Darcy silently rose and stood by his friend. Faced with the wrath of two healthy young gentlemen, all Mr Collins could do was sniff disdainfully and make as dignified an exit as his odd, scuttling gait allowed.
