But quite wonderful.
It took her away from her drunken mother and boorish aunt. It took her away from a life of managing an entire castle, her world consumed by tending to things that her mother should have taken care of. A world where everything depended on her and she, in turn, had no one that she could depend on. Therewasno one. Felkington was a wealthy castle but certainly no man in his right mind would want to marry her with the burden of her mother and aunt upon her shoulders. Now that Julian had seen the reality of her world, there was no way the man would ever be remotely interested.
But it wasn’t just that she was hopeful for Julian, personally. He was far above her social station and she knew it. It was the fact that it could have beenanyman. Any man she had made an acquaintance of who had seen the reality of her life with her mother and aunt. It just happened to be Julian who had seen it and wanted nothing to do with it.
She didn’t blame him in the least.
Looking up from the blue garment, Lista looked around the room. Even though she had a lavish chamber of her own back at Felkington, there was something different about Addington’s. It was a luxurious room that clearly belonged to a woman who had a family to love her. A woman who surely must have had many marital prospects, a woman who could be herself and not have to worry about her fragile mother and misbehaving aunt.
A woman who had everything Lista had been denied.
That understanding had never been more painful than it was at this very moment.
She couldn’t accept the dry dress. She couldn’t accept anything of Addington’s because it simply wasn’t right. She was still damp, and still cold, but she wasn’t going to change herclothing. In fact, she was going to gather her mother and aunt and find an inn somewhere in the village to spend the night before they headed home.
She wasn’t going to impose on the perfect world of de Velt any longer.
Lista yanked the chamber door open and charged through, heading for the stairs. Julian had been standing right outside the door, startled when he saw her practically run to the steps. He called after her but she didn’t answer him, taking the steps far too quickly. He was behind her and he seriously thought she was going to slip and fall all the way to the bottom, but she somehow managed to keep her footing.
Hitting the bottom of the steps, she began to run.
Puzzled, Julian ran after her.
The mist outside had turned into a wet blanket. Everything it touched was instantly sopping wet and that included Lista as she ran into the fog. Julian called after her twice, finally catching up to her about halfway to the stables. Reaching out, he grabbed her arm, forcing her to a halt. But even as they came to a stop, Lista was struggling to pull away from him.
“My lady?” he said, trying to hold on to her without hurting her. “Whatever is the matter? Why are you running?”
“Please,” Lista said, trying to yank her arm free. “Please let me go. I must have our escort prepared.”
Julian was looking at her with mounting concern. “But why?” he said. “What has happened?”
Lista stopped tugging because he clearly wasn’t going to let her go. His grip was like iron. His hair, wet, had come away from the right side of his face and was now plastered against his right temple and cheek. Even in the torchlight of the bailey, which was still fairly bright, Lista could see the full scope of the man’s face and she wasn’t disappointed. He was glorious. But she also noticed that he had two different-colored eyes– one eye wasbright green and the other was a light brown, almost a hazel. The hair draped over his eye had covered up the fact that the right eye was light brown.
But she didn’t give it a second thought. If anything, it simply made him more handsome in her opinion. Handsome and kind and polite.
And he didn’t want anything to do with her.
“Sir Julian,” she said as steadily as she could. “I have troubled you for the last time. I want you to listen to me very carefully. Will you do this?”
His brow furrowed. “Of course I will, my lady. But why do you…?”
She cut him off before he could finish. “Please listen,” she said again. “I want you to let my arm go.”
He did, without hesitation. Lista straightened her sleeve before continuing. “Now,” she said. “When we first met, I was sharp with you. I have apologized for that and I will do it yet again. I am sorry for the way I spoke to you. You and your mother were very kind to me and my mother and I will always be very grateful for that. Your mother was warm and welcoming to a woman she’d known as a child, but it never occurred to your mother that the woman she knew long ago is not the same woman of today. My mother is a reckless fool. It was a mistake to come here and impose upon your family. I am going to make sure our escort is prepared and then I am taking my mother and aunt away. We should not be here.”
He was still frowning, unsure what had her so upset. “But I do not understand,” he said. “You did not seem upset when I left you to change your clothing. Did I say something to offend you?”
She looked at him as if startled by the question. After a moment, a smile spread across her face, but it wasn’t one of humor. The laugh that came from her mouth was one of great irony.
“Sir Julian, you do not have to pretend with me any longer,” she said. “I understand that twice you have been forced into escorting me so you do not have to pretend it is something you are doing of your own free will. I am simply the daughter of a madwoman and what you have seen today is my life, every single day. Every morning is hell, every afternoon is exhaustion, and every night is spent wondering what is going to happen on the morrow. I’ve seen many a person turn away from my mother and me, so I know the expression well. I could see it in your face, too. I do not blame you. Though it has been my great honor to make your acquaintance, I ask that you go now and leave me alone. I have preparations to make.”
With that, she turned on her heel and continued rushing towards the stables, leaving Julian standing there in confusion. He’d never heard a speech like that in his life, so he stood there a moment as he pondered every word. He had been thinking that he had been the one to send her running out into the mist, but now he was starting to realize that it wasn’t him at all.
… or was it?
It took him a moment to realize that his wet hair had moved away from his right eye, exposing it. To those who had never seen his dual-toned eyes before, he knew how it looked. He’d had priests try to exorcise him, or throw holy water on him, or even herd people away from him. His father got the same reaction because his eye color was so pronounced.The Devil’s Eyes, people used to say. Cole’s eyes had the trait, but they were hardly noticeable, while Cassian had also possessed the trait to a larger degree. But Julian… his was quite obvious. Perhaps that trait had chased Lista de la Mere away but, somehow, she seemed tougher than that. She didn’t seem the type to shy away from something different or superstitious. But then again, he didn’t know her at all.
Perhaps he was wrong.
