I nod, adding a full smile. “Go, you need to do that.”
“I won’t be out too late. I have an early skate tomorrow.” He turns, and as he hustles off so many emotions run through me, my heart seems to putter with confusion.
I’m sad they lost.
I’m happy he’s making friends on the team and they are coping their own way.
I’m so proud of him for making it here.
And if I’m honest with myself, I’m really looking forward to a warm bubble bath and some quiet time to read before bed. Do I miss being the one Noah spends all his time with?
A little.
But it’s healthy for him to grow up too.
I make my way to the parking lot, being careful not to get hit as beams of headlights race out of the exit. When I finally find my little car under a sheet of fresh powder, I brush the snow off my windshield with the sleeve of my pink coat. An SUV pulls up beside me and beeps the horn.
Slowly, I turn but I already know. Bill has the driver’s side window down, and he’s leaning an elbow over the edge.
“Hey, you,” I say. “Good game for the first one.”
Shrugging with his face, he says. “Lots of room for improvement.”
I dig in my purse for my key ring, finding it right as I ask, “Are you joining the team for wings too?”
He laughs, his eyes crinkling with mock shock as though I’d broken some sacred rule. “No one invites the boss.” His voice is playful, but there’s something there. It’s almost like a nervous edge I never noticed before. He turns to fully face me and raises his brows like he expects me to know what he wants.
My pulse stutters as he waves me toward him with his finger. It’s like there’s an invisible string pulling me to him. I step forward, closing the gap between me and his car. “Can I kiss you now?” His voice is raspy.
My breath catches. Part of me wants to play it cool. We aren’t in the building anymore but I’m still in the parking lot. Sure, most everyone has left, but still…you never know who will see, and the gossip mill in Mapleton is another level.
But it is mostly dark outside.
A part deep down inside of me wants to kiss him. I’m not trying to be a tease or put him off. I certainly don’t want him to get sick of me pushing him away.
I’m all too aware of the risk I’m taking when I take a small step forward.
I lean over, expecting to press a chaste kiss to his lips and back up before someone sees me, but as soon as our lips touch, they melt together. My knees almost buckle, and I slide my hand up to hold on to the car for balance. When I finally do pull away, my chest rises and falls too quickly. “Get in the car,” he whispers, but I don’t have any problems making out what he says.
Still gripping the car, I take a deep breath and risk a joke, “That’s what kidnappers say, you know.”
“Clearly, I’m not a kidnapper.” He chuckles, but his eyes never leave mine. That’s the thing about him that gets me the most. As successful as he is, with all the things he must have to do, he never acts rushed around me. I always feel like I’m the priority, as he’s a giver of quality time.
The tension that had been building all day from the suspense of the game, and even from not seeing him, slips away. Maybe it’s a mistake, but I walk around to the other side of his SUV and slide into the passenger seat.
I don’t ask questions because somewhere along the way, I’ve learned to trust he handles things better than I ever would. I buckle up in silence as he watches me. My curiosity prickles as I don’t know what to expect from him. Instead of driving off, he looks me dead in the eyes. “Tonight was brutal.”
“The guys—”
He cuts me off, speaking firmly over me, “Not the guys losing. Do you know how hard it was for me to look at you all the way across the arena and not be able to be by you? You have to tell Noah about us. I’m not doing that again. He’s not a little boy.He’s eighteen, and he went out with his teammates. He won’t even care what you do.”
I bite my lip, fighting the way my whole body leans toward him. “Not yet,” I whisper, the words tasting like regret the second they leave my lips. The air between us shifts. My chest tightens with guilt. Before I can stop myself, I blurt softly, “Sorry. I know this is so insane. I’m a forty-year-old woman, but Noah is…you know, he has anxiety. I was really hoping they’d win the game tonight, so I’d have that in my pocket, but—”
“Don’t be sorry. In a weird way, I get it, and I know I’m being selfish.” His lips curve into that boyish grin that always makes my knees weak. “I love sneaking around with you.”
His words hit me low in the stomach, bringing a little relief, but it doesn’t relieve what I know I must do. I don’t want to think about it now though. I have a little time before Noah comes home, and I slide as far as I can in my seat, getting as close as possible to Bill. I drop my voice playfully. “Tell you what, just give me a little more time. A week tops. In the meantime, I will meet you anywhere you want as long as it’s private but not private, and public but not public.”
His throat bobs with a swallow. “That’s a deal.”
