“Oh my.” Her eyes locked on my scar. “That’s what they did to you when you were just a baby.” She blinked in rapid succession, but it no longer held back the tears, as each blink pulled down a single tear. “I never had a choice to give you away. I searched for years, and it was like they’d hidden you from me. There hasn’t been a day that I haven’t thought about you.” She shook her head back and forth, letting the tears cascade freely now. Maybe I expected my mother to be more closed off, and private, but she wasn’t that way at all. She honestly just looked broken.
Like me.
Only in nicer clothing.
She opened her arms slightly, as if not to get her hopes up too much. “Can I hug you?”
It was like the hands of time rewound, giving grace to all the moments we never shared, and I stepped forward to embrace her.
She never asked me what I wanted from her.
Call it a mother’s intuition, but I felt she just knew I didn’t want anythingbut to know her,and her willingness to let me in was evident from that first embrace.
“You have to come back to the palace with me.” My mother beckoned me forward as she strolled down the pebbled path. “I have so many things to show you.
Blinking, I did my best to wake from this dream, because I couldn’t imagine the disappointment I’d feel if this continued to unfold perfectly, and I’d wake up later.
Nothing changed.
I stood on solid ground staring at my mother beaming back at me, and I breathed a little lighter as I stepped in unison with her. I was going to the palace with my mother, two things I never in my life thought I would say.
The palace was a palace, was a palace. There’s not much more you can say but that. It was exactly how you’d picture a place where royalty lived. From its high cathedral ceilings with gold and crystal chandeliers hanging ineveryroom, to the huge grand halls, and spiral staircases. I fought to keep my jaw from hanging open. Everything about it was grand, and my mother passed through the halls with her chin up as if she hardly noticed her surroundings were anything unusual.
Servants bustled around cleaning, and a personal maid seemed to come out of nowhere as soon as we passed through the front entrance. She was waiting ready to replace Mother’s outdoor shoes with warm slippers. The place ran like a well-oiled machine, and my eyes panned over each room we passed, awe filling my chest.
Did I feel like I missed out on something?
Maybe a little.
Okay, that’s a huge understatement.
Confusion throbbed in the front of my brain. How in the world did I grow up so completely opposite to my mother? My heart sank as we passed through yet another chamber. This one filled with walls of museum-worthy canvas paintings and marble sculptures. I had always assumed my mother had been too poor to raise me.
This was quite the opposite.
Not humbling at all.
In fact, it was infuriating.
Surely, there’d would have been some tiny corner in this place that I could have lived as I didn’t require much. She had every resource in the entire country at her fingertips, and nobody could say boo about it because she was the queen. Chewing the inside of my cheek, I stayed silent as death when we passed into yet another room, this one smaller than the last with a rich crimson rug in the center of the room, and a Queen Anne desk in front of the large bay window. Here, she slowed her steps, shutting the solid wood door behind her, and turned to gaze to me. “This is my private office. All my staff know they aren’t to interrupt. It’s the only place I can really speak openly. Come,” she waved me farther into the room, motioned for me to sit on one of the high-back chairs, “make yourself comfortable. We have so much to talk about.”
“Where do we start.” I promptly sat exactly where she had pointed, not wanting to do anything to wear out my welcome before I was ready to leave. The chair cushion was so soft, I sunk right down into it, feeling a heaviness encapsulate my whole body.
She gracefully sat in the chair opposite me, taking the time to tuck her dress perfectly beneath her but she didn’t raise her gaze when she started, “I’d like to start with an apology.”
I waved dismissively. “No, there’s no need—”
“Please.” Her face stilled, waiting for me to allow her the space to talk, and I buttoned my lip before she went on, “I wasn’t in this position when I had you, as I was under my father’s rule.” Her gaze took a faraway expression. “This would have been so different if only the timing was better.”
“It’sfine, really,” I squeaked out. So many nights I slept under the stars as that was my only option, and I dreamed of all the fake identities I could give myself to give a face to my real family. Never in a million years could anybody convince me my mom was an actual queen. Yet, the most surprising thing is that I had empathy for her situation.
“It’s not fine, but it is what it is.” Her eyelids appeared heavy as she raised her gaze to meet mine again. “My father passed away a year ago. With me being the only heir, taking the crown was an easy transition for me. I never married again, as I never had my first marriage dissolved. I willingly took the throne as governing gives me a way to give back, and nobody is making decisions for me anymore.”
Swallowing, my brow furrowed as I tried to hear the words she wasn’t speaking. “I can’t make up for lost time,” she went on, “life is short, and I hate to waste any more of the precious time we’ve been given. What would you say about moving into the palace with me, and getting to know the life that was stolen from you?”
My brows shot to the ceiling, and I leaned forehead as her invitation rung around my head. That can’t be right. “Pardon me?” I sputtered out.
“No pressure of course, and if you don’t find it comfortable, you may leave whenever.” A light blush crept down her cheek. “I realize you aren’t a child anymore, and you certainly have your own life, but I want to offer you the chance to try to regain what is rightfully yours.”
