And here he was.
The look he gave me seemed to project our past right into the front of my brain. There was so much more in his heatedwhat-ifstare. And I could have stood in it all day, basking in the memories.
six
Graham
I wrapped my fingers around the edge of the bar and squeezed, grounding myself in place. I had imagined this day, running into Chatterbox again so many times in my mind. I’d be running out of my executive office in some big city, where I’d bump into her in the hall like some perfect meet-cute collision in which she was lost. We’d instantly know each other and have that moment when we both knew our lives were about to change forever. I’d had that thought so many times, but every time I had a chance to get my life together before it happened.
Until now.
I couldn’t be in a worse place as there was nothing impressive about anything I had going on. I’d just bought this dump of a bookstore that barely made enough money for rent. I couldn’t even call it a job, let alone a career. I was living upstairs in a one-bedroom apartment I shared with Hadley.Man—Hadley. I face palmed. I loved her dearly, but she was never in my fantasy. How would I explain Hadley?
Chatterbox was talking about something. She obviously hadn’t changed that part of her personality. It had sort of a coming-home feeling. Okay, not even close to a-coming-home feeling. That would be wholesome. It had anall-I-wanted-to-do-was-kiss-her-to-shut-her-upfeeling. Ah, now she was staring at me and not talking. Had she asked a question? I wasn’t listening.Think.“Pardon me?” I asked, doing my best to focus on her words and not on my jetting thoughts.
“I, ah, said you look great, too.” Her compliment felt like all the years flashing back. With a goodbye like we’d had so many years ago, it had definitely left me wondering. So many times, I had thought about this—and I didn’t want to ruin it again. I just didn’t know the right way tosayit all.
Always a writer, I was better with a pen. Pens were great because they automatically gave me something to fidget with in times like this. I squeezed the counter again, digging for words. “So, are you in town long?” I started in my best casual voice. “Because we should totally meet up for dinner one night to catch up.”
Too nonchalant. I can see it in the way she leans back, she’s trying to come up with an excuse. Shoot. I should have waited.
“Uh, yeah for the week.” She pulled on her earlobe, transporting my mind back to our kiss. “I like to eat,” she added with a strained expression.
Every minute or so, her eyes would replant on Hadley, reminding me there was an elephant in the room. Hadley was the best thing to have ever happened to me, and every day I was prouder of her, but it wascomplicated. To make things appear even more complicated—because that’s my life—the backdoor opened. Lacy walked in, and her gaze found Hadley. “Hey, hon. Are you ready to go to class?”
Hadley slid off her chair, cup in hand, and followed her, calling back, “Bye, Dad. Love you.”
“Love you, too. See you later.” I arched my brow toward Lacy, “Thanks. I’ll pick them up.” They both waved bye, and I waited until the door was closed, all while wracking my brain for possible words to explain this all.
Nothing was ever easy.
Chatterbox’s eyelashes fluttered like butterfly wings trying to find their bearings in the wind. It was beautiful and one of those innocent gestures that told meexactlywhat she was feeling. I didn’t owe her an explanation, but her discomfort was obvious. “That’s Lacy.” I motioned to the closed door. “Her daughter is the same age as Hadley, so she helps me by taking Hadley when I’m working.”
“Oh.” Her lips pinched together. I waited for her to say something else, but she didn’t, so I went on.
“I work nights, sometimes at a bar. There isn’t daycare available then. She takes Hadley, and, um, she’s a friend, and…well, she’s married. Not to me.” It all sounded so dumb when I heard it out loud.Stop talking!She literally came here for coffee, not to hear about my daycare woes. “Thirsty?” I pointed to the bar behind me. She jolted, probably from my lack of segue there, but I held my own and flashed her a smile.
“Oh, yeah.” Her eyes fled to the menu. “I’ll have a large iced mocha and…” Her words dragged out like she was thinking of the perfect topping. I grabbed the large cup and wrote down mocha and waited for the rest of her order. She was taking forever, and she wasn’t looking at the menu anymore. Her eyes had planted on me. “Also, that dinner you asked me to.”
I got a rush of some stomach thing. It wasn’t butterflies because these were less graceful. Like rhinoceroses stomping all around. I took a chance and wrote my number on her cup, something I’d never done before but I’d seen it in the movies. Then I swallowed that thing in my throat. Strep throat must begoing around. I was going to need a doctor before she made it out of here. “I should be done around six.”
Her lips slid into a sweet smile. “Perfect.” She stood, signaling to the exit. “I need to return to work, but it will be great to catch up.”
“I’ll make this…for you.” I fumbled with the cup like it was my first day at this job and all I had to work with was four left thumbs. She was quiet as she watched me. A bead of sweat rolled down my brow as I finished. I poured more than coffee into that cup, and I was all nerves when I snapped the lid on, handing it to her.
She took one look at the cup with my number scribbled on it. “I’ll text you.”
She left, rather silently. Not that it mattered how much noise she did or didn’t make. I was on full alert and unable to sit, completely dumbfounded. I stared at her back as she hurried down the street. Even though I fought it, it brought back all the hard memories of my youth that I had tried too hard to bury.
seven
Elinora
I ducked out of the bookstore, my chest about to implode. There was no way that had just happened. And I was dressed as aGator.Massive facepalm. Only one wasn’t enough, so I bounced my head off my palm, and slammed my face again.
And he had a Hadley.
Talk about a gut-punch. I wrapped my arm around my middle, begging my intestines to behave.How does he have a Hadley?And she was perfect, a little carbon copy of him but with a happier resting face. I didn’t even have a boyfriend, and he had a Hadley. How was that fair?
