Noah’s laugh stops abruptly. A worried and conflicted expression crosses his face. “He’ll be back soon, I promise. Do you want me to call him?”
“No, that’s not necessary,” I state, taking a deep breath. Noah looks like Ashton, but he’s not Ashton. And I know Ashton whereas I don’t truly know Noah. But I trust that Ashton wouldn’t leave me alone with a man who would hurt me.
Gosh, what am I thinking? This is his twin brother. And there’s something about Noah that’s familiar, outside the fact that he and Ashton are copied and pasted. But it’s that golden thread of familiarity that’s scaring me and putting me on edge.
A pregnant silence sits in the room as we find ourselves in a staring contest. I have a million questions, but I don’t know where to start. I simultaneously feel like I know this man, yet, I know I don’t. Not really. He’s not a fictional character. This man sitting beside me has not talked to me over the past year. He’s not lived in my head.
Noah Ashley Prewitt is real. Right here.
He chuckles awkwardly, running a hand through his hair. “You’re the last person I expected to see walk through that door. I didn’t have time to prepare.”
“I think that was the point,” I reply, attempting to smile to put him at ease. As uncomfortable as this is for me, it must be for him too. I take a moment to really look at him. While I slept, he must have styled his hair and changed into jeans and a T-shirt. “Are you okay?”
Noah snorts, and I briefly wonder what about that question he finds funny. But then I recall that his family is loaded with people who find humor in unfavorable and uncomfortable situations.
His unhinged-sounding laugh moments ago makes more sense to me now. I’m not the only one coping in this moment.
Noah gestures to the couch, already moving my way. “Do you mind if I sit down beside you?”
I nod, scooching over to make plenty of space between us. Noah sits on the farthest end of the couch while I hole up at the opposite end.
Noah twists to angle himself toward me, so I mimic his actions. Finally, he says, “I’m okay. I wasn’t for a while, but I’m back on my feet. I don’t want you to worry about it. How are you, Esme Lorraine Jenkins? I’ve had a million conversations with you in my head, but here you are. How?”
That captures my attention. Talking to one another through our heads is one thing I can relate to.
“I could say the same,” I state, a small smile flickering on my face. I watch as Noah’s shoulders relax, and that small action paves the way for me to take my first deep breath. He gives me room to continue explaining. “I wrote a book, and, um,” I close my eyes and exhale, “I think it was about us. At least to some extent.”
Noah is slack-jawed for a moment before he shakes his head clear. “You wrote a book? That’s amazing, Esme!” He stands, bringing his hands to his head as he paces. I trace the width of his shoulders with my eyes, and a little shiver runs down my spine. Noah is a big guy. Maybe even more built than Ashton. He takes a few steps back in my direction, and I twist on the couch to face him. He kneels onto one knee in front of me, a brilliant smile on his face. “That was your dream, and you did it. I’m so proud of you!”
Noah takes my hands in his, and I’m overcome by how they swallow mine and how warm they feel. I pull away, shocked by how much I like it.
“Oh, sorry.” Noah clears his throat, taking his place back beside me on the couch. I notice he sits a little closer this time, and I also notice that I don’t mind it.
“No, it’s okay,” I say, mustering sincerity in my eyes. He’s in the same boat I am, both of us jostling for the role of captain. Except neither of us expertly know how to steer around the wreckage of my missing memories. “And thank you. I’m still in awe that I did it. And that Ashton’s offering me a book deal.”
“He forgot to mention that earlier,” Noah says, his thick brows furrowing together. But then he shakes away whatever thought held him hostage for a second, and he plants his smile back in place. “That’s awesome, Esme. Truly. When can I read it?”
My eyes widen, and Noah hurriedly says, “If you want me to, that is.”
I nod. “Of course I do. It’s, uh—” I stop myself from saying it was the whole reason I wanted to find him so that he could sort out my reality, but that’s not entirely true, and that would hurt him if I said that. “I just don’t want to bother you with a newbie’s novel.”
“You could never be a bother, Esme.” Noah’s fingers twitch as if he’s fighting not to touch me. That thought causes my heart to jump, but the jury is out if the reaction is out of desire or skittishness.
No, it’s a hung jury.
“I don’t have my laptop with me. Or my printed manuscript.” I look down, fiddling with my thumbs. “I do have it on my phone, though. If you want to read it there on our way home.”Be brave, Esme. This is why you wanted to find him. He has answers.
“Home?”
I snap my eyes to his. “I didn’t mean to assume you’d come back with us, but I—” I laugh nervously and give a little shrug. “I was hoping you might.”
“Of course I’m coming back. I was planning to go back at the end of the month, anyway.” Once more, Noah’s fingers twitch. I roll my lips into my mouth and place my palms face up on my lap. Noah stares at me, hitching a brow.
A blush creeps across my cheeks, but I will myself to stay strong. He’s just as new to this situation as I am. And I think he needs the contact. “You can take my hands. If you want.” And then as if I needed to justify myself, I tack on, “Maybe it will help me remember everything.”
A wicked grin spreads across Noah’s handsome face, and I don’t know if I want to play with fire or run. His voice lowers an octave as he whispers, “Sweetheart, I will hold your hands until you remember every.” He leans in. “Single.” Our faces are inches apart, and my breath hitches. “Moment.”
I gasp, taken aback by his bold flirtation, but before I can formulate a thought, the door swings open.
