I’m ashamed. It’s as simple as that. I am Lucy May Spence. Voted Most Beautiful, homecoming queen, and prom queen of Juniper Grove High School. I was a cheerleader in college as I pursued my degree in creative writing with a minor in business. I cheered for Stone as he started on the football team his sophomore year when I was a senior.
I’ve dated. A lot. And I’ve never had to enlist a man to pretend to want me for the sake of having someone on my arm at functions and events.
Granted, they’ve pretended on their own in the past. As much as I’ve dated, I’ve experienced heartache for at least half the time because of lying, manipulative men.
But that’s the thing. Stone hasn’t lied to me. He’s been completely upfront about his intentions and purposes…
And I went along with them.
I amactivelygoing along with them as I stand on this green grass in his mother’s yard trying to figure out what to tell my twin.
“I’m in Dasher Valley for a Fourth of July celebration.” There. The truth. Most of it, anyway.
“All the way down there? With who? Did you go by yourself?” Lorelei’s deep lilt indicates her suspicion. She sounds like she’s put on her investigative hat.Her and those stupid crime shows she loves so much…
“No. I’m with my boss.”
“Huh. Are you dating him now?”
I cough several times at her blunt response, but what else should I expect from her? She never holds back from speaking her observations. I love that about her even though it gets me in hot water sometimes. “Um, yeah. I guess I am…”
There. Still truth. Just leaving the embarrassing “fake” part out of it.
“Huh,” she says again. “Hadley never told me that.”
Something stirs in my gut. “Should she have told you? I mean, I haven’t told anyone, really. It’s fairly new. Besides, do you have Hadley watching me or something?” My tone is quipped, and I instantly feel regret. Sure, Hadley knew I was “dating him” at one point, but I’m glad she kept it to herself like I asked. Though it doesn’t negate how small I feel when my sister casually insinuates she has our best friend watching me.
I mean, watching me for what?I’m fine.Does Lorelei think I’m going to do something stupid or crazy or unhinged simply because she’s not around to maintain order? I can keep my own order,thank you—
“Not watching you,” Lorelei says in her signature firm tone. “But I do ask her to check up on you for me. You’re my twin. And you’re missing from my life. We don’t talk as much as we did those first two weeks after I moved. I worry about you. Not because you can’t handle yourself but because you’re literally my other half.”
“I’m sorry I snapped at you.” I bite my bottom lip as silence ensues on the other end. “I’m glad to have such an amazing older-by-one-minute sister like you.”
“But Lucy. Are you okay?”
The hesitancy in her straightforward tone takes me back. Even from across the globe, she can still sense that something is up with me.
“I’m fine,” I lie. Tears threaten to shove their way through, but I hold strong. I didn’t tell my sister about the pool incident two weeks ago. I’m not telling her I’m fake dating my boss. I’m not telling her that dinner has begun to elude me or that I only vacate the apartment for work, “dates” with Stone, or necessary grocery shopping.
She doesn’t need to worry about me. It’s an adjusting phase. Everything will be fine, even if it’s not fine right this very second. And when it comes to Stone, I’m just having fun. When he brought up the idea to fake date on a more permanent scale, I figured what the heck… I’m lonely. He’s fun. I know where I stand with him so there’s no confusion. And if I do happen to meet someone, I trust Stone will let me go. Furthermore, he’s remained faithful to our agreement: we haven’t kissed, touched, or done anything couple-y in private. That alone assuages some of the guilt I feel. Stone is a good guy despite his obvious commitment issues.
He lets me put my feet on the dash, sing in the car, and doesn’t make me feel like I’m crazy or have too high expectations for men when I tell him my book ideas. He encourages my dreams to become a full-time author.
“I’m really okay,” I say after she doesn’t respond. “I see Hadley occasionally and chat with Karoline sometimes. Emma Jane is still at Books and Beans, so I pop in and see her every now and then. And I have Stone. He’s—”
“Did he force you into anything? You know that’s illegal, and I could—”
“No,” I laugh mirthlessly. “He’s done no such thing. I know I’ve said bad things about him in the past such as him being a player and all, but it turns out I misunderstood him. We’ve talked about it. He came onto me so many times, I just finally caved. He’s actually a really good man.”
He is. I told her that before she moved. I’ll continue to stand by that assessment. And I’ll also add “saves lives” to my list of reasons because…
He saved me.
That’s not something I can easily forget.
I sneak a glance over my shoulder and find that he has positioned himself to where he’s staring straight at me while he talks with Tate. He brings his thumb to his bottom lip and winks. I snap my head back around, a blush crawling up my face as I recall the way he traced his thumb over my bottom lip when he pulled me under the Ease-Up tent to set up lunch only thirty minutes ago.
“You’ve said that before, but I just want to make sure you’re okay. If you say you are, then I’ll believe you. But please check inwith me more often than you have been. Don’t make me have to call you every time we talk, okay?”
