I’m simply confused; the man who was supposed to date my twin popped into my home andproposedto me. What was with that? Who does that? He doesn’t know me well enough to want to marry me. We’ve had two dates, and he believed I was my sister! Crazy man.
My sister preyed upon my confusion and told Finley that I’d love to have kids someday and that I would meet him tomorrow for lunch.
Which I most certainly did not agree to.
“Everything okay, Lorelei? You’ve been grimacing at your computer for the past thirty seconds.”
I startle at the voice as Mr. Austen lightly closes my office door.
“Sorry, sir. I’m fine. Just…” What do I even tell him? I know I shouldn’t talk about personal things with my boss, but I also don’t like lying. And we’ve talked about plenty of other personal things like his past and my autism.
“Just what? You can talk to me.” He sits down, tugging at the excess pant material on his thigh before crossing a leg.
“Well, um…” How do I even begin? “My sister’s date asked me to date him with marriage in mind last night. And then I almost fainted.” He blinks with long, light orange eyelashes. “Because I had a hypoglycemic episode. Not because of him,” I quickly add. Though, I’m not sure if his proposal of sorts wouldn’t have warranted the same reaction.
“That’s…” Mr. Austen grins. “Something.”
When he chuckles under his breath, I join him, the release of the pent-up worries and concerns washing away with every breathy laugh. Eventually, I say, “That’s an understatement.”
His eyebrows almost touch. “Did your sister know about this?”
I nod. “Oh, yeah. It seems she was in on it. At least, that’s what she told me last night after he left. She said they were not compatible but she thought I would be. And that he liked me a lot.”
Me.
“Hm. Tell me more.”
So I do. I spill my guts to my boss in my office because there is no way I can talk to Hadley or Lucy or my parents about this. Maybe my parents, but they would let something slip when chatting to Lucy.
Because apparently there is something to slip, judging by Mr. Austen’s next words…
“You like this man,” he says plainly. As if it were the most obvious thing in the world. He leans back in the chair.
“Yes.” I process, thinking over my next words, trying to be as accurate as possible. “I dolikehim. As a friend. He’s intelligent, kind, and funny. But there are many people in this world with those same qualities. Why should I jump into a relationship with someone simply because they measure up to at least a quarter of the population?”
“Well,” Mr. Austen drums his fingers on his bent knee, “I think that’s what relationships are for, Lorelei. When I met my wife eleven years ago, I was instantly swept away in her beauty. As I began to talk with her, I realized she was kind, witty, smart, loving, and caring.” He pauses and nods towards me. “Qualities many possess, as you’ve stated.”
“So how did you know dating her was the right thing to do?”
Mr. Austen’s eyes glaze over as if he’s been transported back in time to the happiest of memories. A faint smile tugs at the corner of his lips. “I didn’t. I took a shot. I asked her out on a date. I liked it and had fun. So I asked her for another one. We dated for three years while I was in college. Before I knew it, I was down on one knee asking to date her for the rest of my life. Those few days married to her were the best of my life.”
The love in his voice for which he speaks of his deceased wife is nothing short of inspiring. But also… devastating. He spent a few short days married to that woman before God took her away from him. My stomach clenches at the thought of losing someone I love, especially after a short amount of time with them when I was expecting forever.
That’s another thing that scares me… completely devoting myself to one man for the rest of my life, only to have his life end way before mine.
How does a woman crawl out of the dark depths that would be left in his absence? How did Mr. Austen do it? It must have been such a painful journey for him, one that he constantly revisits, I’m sure.
“I don’t know if I have ever told you this, but you inspire me, Mr. Austen. Not only as my boss but also as someone I can faithfully look up to and trust.”
He uncrosses his legs and leans forward. “Thanks, Lorelei. You are a wonderful employee. And as much as I would not want to lose you to a different country, I have the inkling you should give this Finley a chance. From what you’ve told me, he seems sincere. And you’ll never know if you should date him unless you do. Unless you give him a chance. Unless you allow him the time to show you how set apart from the rest of the men of this world he is.”
“Well, when you put it that way…” I joke, but in reality, my stomach is clenching for another reason: If… a huge IF… I was to get serious with Finley.IFI ended up marrying him, I would have to leave Donwell Law Firm. I would have to leave Juniper Grove and my friends and my…
No.
I can’t leave Lucy alone here. She needs me.
I school a neutral expression and say, “Thank you so much for the advice and for listening, Mr. Austen. I’m going to take what you’ve said into consideration and pray over it.”
