As messed up as I was seeing Aiden in the player lounge after he’d run off yesterday without any warning, Elliot had reminded me how much I loved being part of a team. I knew there would be many more reminders to come, showing me all the things I missed, as well as all the things I hadn’t.
With Elliot’s help, I chose a pair of skates, then I had the trainer tape my ankles and wrists since I was so out of practice. By the time I suited up and made it to the ice, the boys were all out there doing their on-ice warm-ups. Which I was thankful for since I felt a little wobbly on my blades.
I stopped at the gate to the rink, letting the moment wash over me. The smells and sounds that wafted through the air welcomed me back. I’d skated here. Been happy here. My eyesslid shut, and I took it all in until someone, my body and Hawk recognized, stopped in front of me.
“You okay, Coach?”
That voice… soft, sensual, and caring like a well-known lover who knew all your quirks.
Hawk nudged me when I didn’t respond, and I opened my eyes. Aiden’s face greeted me. His soft, pouty mouth, free of the gloss I’d been so fascinated with the other night, beckoned me. I wanted to lean in and taste him so fucking bad.
My shoulders rose and fell as I took a deep breath. “I’m good. It’s just been a while.”
He nodded, his eyes never leaving mine, “I didn’t…”
“I didn’t think you did.”
My eyes traveled over the guys on the rink, players and coaches, and the looks they were giving us unnerved me.
“This isn’t the time or place…”
“I’ll leave you be…”
“That’s not what I meant. We need to have this conversation, but not here.”
“Okay.” He looked down at Hawk and said, “Is he coming out with you?”
“No. Not yet. I’m not sure how he’ll do on the ice or with so much going on. His job is to protect me so…”
Not getting on the ice until I stood in front of the team I’d be coaching was a mistake. An idiotic mistake.
“C’mon. It’s the first day. According to the schedule, it’s a light skate and some drills.” Aiden said, pushing off and skating away.
He was fucking fast. Faster than I had been when I played for damn sure. I took a deep breath, placed my skate on the ice, and pushed off. Hawk whined behind me. I turned to check on him without thinking. As I spun around, the anxiety that I might make a fool of myself drifted away, as did the racing heart, shaking hands, and quaking knees. My face loosened up as did all the other muscles that had been on lockdown since I got to my feet after lacing up my skates.
A small laugh bubbled up, and I moved back to my pup, sliding down to a knee on the ice. I came to a stop before Hawk, who stood half on and off the ice.
“Stay here, buddy, okay? I’ll be fine,” I said, ruffling his fur. He licked my hand, then lay down in the open gate. His chin rested on the ledge between the bench and the ice.
I skated out to center ice and waved the guys over. I decided the best path forward was honesty. When everyone gathered around, I said, “Sorry about earlier guys, the lights fucked with my vision. I’m not sure if you guys all know my history. And if you do, you might not know the extent of my injuries.”
There were some nods and head shakes, so I decided to explain. “Hawk is my service dog. His job is to stand at my side as an early warning system since I am profoundly deaf and have limited sight on one side. The lack of hearing will make it difficult in the beginning for me to track you and pick up conversations on the ice, but it will get easier as I get used to the environment again.”
I paused, and the guys exchanged looks. This timid shit would get old fast, so I said, “Ask whatever questions you have. Today is the only chance you’ll get a free pass.”
More traded looks. I waited them out and then the captain spoke up, “Which side and is there anything we can do to help, because to be coached bytheSasha Storm… well, I’m all in.”
“What’s your name?”
“Trey Malachek.”
“Nice to meet you, Trey, and as for what you can do to help, there’s not much you can do. I know my limitations, and if I need help, I’ll ask, but in the beginning, if you’re on the affected side calling out to me, I might not pick up your location at first.”
“So what’s it like?” I turned and looked at one of the kids decked out in goalie gear.
“What’s your name?”
“Ryan Riordan, sir.”
