“Oh I don’t fucking know? Take care of my fucking husband?”
He stared at me. “Why? We weren’t together anymore. I told you it was over, and I didn’t wanna be with you anymore.”
“Well, I wasn’t raised that way. You were gravely injured, and we were still legally married. Still are since you haven’t signed the papers.”
“You haven’t signed them either. You just left them on the table.”
“Yes, I did and since you mentioned it, for someone who doesn’t wanna be with me anymore, you certainly have a hard time keeping your dick outta my ass.”
“That was just sex.”
Those words sliced me open as cleanly as a knife.
“Don’t lie to me…”
“That’s your role, not mine.”
My teeth ached from clenching my jaw, trying to keep the conversation from escalating further. “I’m not rehashing old shit.”
“Why? Because you hate the reminder that we’re in this mess because you fucking lied?”
“We’re in this mess because you refused to listen and walked away. You wouldn’t even talk to Walker.”
“Why so he could make excuses for you to justify…”
“Explain. There is no fucking excuse for what I did. I lied. By omission, yes, but it was still a lie. I admit it, but you walked away. You refused to have a conversation. You didn’t sign the divorce papers, and we’ve been living in limbo ever since.”
“You didn’t sign the papers either.”
“Because I don’t want a divorce.”
I turned and walked away from him before I turned into a blubbering idiot in front of the man. Again.
“What do you mean you don’t want a divorce?”
I stopped, but I didn’t turn around. I took a long, deep breath and closed my eyes.
“I think it’s pretty self-explanatory. I don’t want a divorce. I want my fucking husband back. I want us to have the life we were building together.”
“Then why the fuck did I find divorce papers on the kitchen table when I got home?”
I whirled around.
“Because you said you wanted the divorce, and I love you too fucking much not to give you want you want. You told me to fucking handle it. So, I did.”
“Then why not sign them? If that’s what you thought I wanted.”
Tears I’d been fighting rolled down my face unbidden, but I ignored them. “Because I hoped… I fucking prayed you didn’t really want a divorce. That maybe, just maybe, you were only hurt, and we could eventually work things out. So, yeah, I left the papers on the table, unsigned. If you signed and returned them, I’d know you were serious. If I’d gotten them back, I would’ve signed them, then I would’ve had the attorneys file them. But you didn’t send them back. And I’ve lived on the edge of a cliff for years waiting and hoping.”
I turned back to the house, leaving him standing in the idyllic alcove behind Marion and Conrad’s home. It reminded me of something out of a movie about fairies and woodland sprites. At the back door, I paused with a hand on the handle, steadying myself for the onslaught of questions and concern.
I walked into the house, but paused when I heard Heidi’s voice.
“Do you think it’s going to work?”
“I dunno. We can only hope.”
“Lucia, you should have told him.”
