“Yes, I was,” she sighed. “But I believe all of the traveling has caught up to me. I think it would be best for me to rest a while, and rejoin the festivities in the morning.”
“That is anything but what is best,” her father thundered. “Now do not be so ridiculous. You know why we are here now, and so there is no need for you to pretend not to be involved. You are to woo this duke.”
“Perhaps if I had known that was my aim, I might have been more prepared to do so.”
“I could not risk such a thing, and you know that. Now, if you are refusing to be a good house guest, then your sister and I shall doour part as well as yours. You will not pull this stunt a second time, is that clear?”
“Of course,” she replied, simply content for that to be the end of it.
They left, and she threw herself onto her bed.
She knew that she was being incredibly rude, and a terrible guest, but she could not imagine facing everyone in attendance after what she learned. She was not a fool; she knew something was odd about coming to the duke’s estate even if hewasa friend of her father.
She simply never imagined her father had arranged a courtship with the intention to marry her off. She certainly had not expected him to do it without saying a word to her. It was more his style to announce it to all he knew, and toy with her until the last possible moment.
His motives were simple, there was no denying that, and in some way, she understood them completely. That did not make it any better that he had kept it from her deliberately, and now was berating her for not being happy about it.
Time passed, the hum of the dinner beneath her only serving to make her feel far worse, and eventually it was dark out. She heard a knock at her door and closed her eyes, feigning sleep.
“Jackie?” Elizabeth whispered. “Are you awake?”
Jackie remained silent, refusing to give any indication that she was. Regardless, her sister entered.
“I know you likely hate me right now,” she continued. “And you have every right to, but I will make it up to you. Even if it takes me the rest of my life, I will do something to fix this. I love you.”
She left again, and Jackie felt tears form in her eyes. It was the first time that they had ever truly argued, and she hated it, but she could not forgive it. She understood that Elizabeth had only done it because she had deemed it a necessary evil, but that did not make it hurt any less.
She tried to sleep, but it wouldn’t come. Nothing made it any easier to fall asleep, and even when she did, she was awake again within minutes. Eventually, she gave in and noticed that the sky was lightening once more, and temptation took over her completely.
As a girl, she would watch the sunrise with her mother, and the two of them would talk about anything and everything that came to mind. Jackie still did it, from time to time, and it was the right morning for it. Tiptoeing through the halls, she found the door leading outside and seated herself, watching the sky turn red, then orange.
“This is quite awful, Mama,” she said gently. “I don’t suppose that you ever saw me in a situation such as this, did you? I know I certainly did not. It is strange, because a part of me knows that I would have done it willingly had I known.”
She almost waited for a response, though she knew that none would come.
“The house is lovely, is it not?” She continued. “It is larger than anything I could have dreamed of, and Elizabeth certainly seems enamored with it. And the gardens are wonderful. I do so love flowers, as you know, and these have been tended to beautifully. It makes me think about being courted, and how I might have received flowers of my own.”
She was to be courted, of course, but not in the way she had once thought.
“I wonder, Mama, if you were here, things would have been different? Of course it would have, for Father never would have started to—never mind. What I mean to say is that I would have married another gentleman, surely? Would he have been a duke, do you think? Likely not, even if I was liked during my season. An earl would have been perfectly fine, though. I was never one for riches, which is just as well given what happened when you… when you left us.”
Had her mother been there, Jackie was quite sure that she would have smiled, rubbed her arm affectionately, and told her to be brave and do what she thought was right. It was a scary situation to be in, that much was clear, but the only way out was through, and so she had to act accordingly. After all, how bad could life as a duchess be?
As if on cue, the duke appeared. He was not near her, but close enough that she knew it was him. She wondered if it was mere coincidence, or if she was being followed again, but he appeared not to have noticed her. If anything, he was walking in the opposite direction, and she should have been pleased about that, but she was not.
She was resigned to her fate. If it helped her family, then she would marry the duke and do what was necessary to make her life good. However, marrying him meant that she would need to be accustomed to him sooner or later, and she thought it best that they knew one another well before too much time passed. He had been pleasant enough, after all, and seemed to be quite different from the man she had met once before.
“Your Grace?” She called, and he froze, turning to her. “Good morning.”
He remained still for a moment, and only partially turned. His hair hid his face, but she saw some scarring on his hands and arms even with the distance between them.
It was old scarring, a shade lighter than his complexion, slightly raised and taut in some areas. She had never seen such a thing on a person before, but from what she had been told he was supposed to be a hideously disfigured man. This, however, was nothing like the red and raw state she had been expecting to see.
“Good morning, Lady Jacqueline,” he replied at last. “I hope that you slept well.”
“Well, if we are to begin this honestly, you might as well know that I did not. I have certainly found it easier to sleep, at least.”
He paused for a moment, and she wondered what was going through his head. She had been disrespectful, even if she had good intentions, and it was not too dissimilar to the situation they were in years ago, when he was most unkind to her. She waited for the harsh words, but they did not come.
