We’re at sea in a storm and poor Jocelyn and even Uncle, Marianne and Charles have been dragged into this maelstrom. We will find safe harbor. I know we will.
Marianne touched her hand gently “You looked as if you were lost in a world of your own. Are you sure you’re alright?”
At that moment there was a knock on the door and Mrs. Jennings entered. “Lord Ludlow and Lord Hatfield have called. Shall I show them through?”
For a moment Olivia longed with all her heart to see Marcus’ face. It was so difficult to know he was in the house and wanted to see her… and yet she couldn’t bring herself to invite him to stay.
She looked at Marianne. “Jocelyn is out at the milliners. I cannot find the energy to greet Lord Ludlow or Lord Hatfield this afternoon.”
“Very well,” decided Marianne. “I will be leaving soon anyway, and you would be without a chaperone.” She looked at Mrs. Jennings. “Please tell their Lordships that we are not at home to visitors this afternoon, but we hope to welcome them again very soon.”
“Very good, my Lady,” said Mrs. Jennings.
As Mrs. Jennings left to relay the message, Marianne looked at Olivia strangely and she knew her friend did not believe her. “And Lord Hatfield? I see your breathing change and you look flushed in color. My dear, is there anything you wish to share about Lord Hatfield?
Olivia looked away, stammering. “I erm, I …”
“No, no I do not believe for a minute anything on that scandal sheet. However, I have noticed that Lord Hatfield looks at you often and seems to listen to your every word. I have wondered if he admires you. Now I see this distress, and I wonder if you might have an affection for him?” Marianne paused, holding her friend's hand, and looking directly at her.
“My dear. Are you in love with Lord Marcus Hatfield?”
Olivia couldn’t believe she had let her emotions show. She shook her head in denial, while finding it hard to say anything.
Then she saw Marianne’s kind and concerned face, and remembered this was her friend who had been with her through the darkest days of her life.
“I believe I do,” she whispered. “But I’m damaged physically. I’m no longer beautiful. And now, it seems my reputation may be ruined.” She pressed her friend's hand in quiet thankfulness for having such a caring confidante. “Don’t say anything. Please forget we ever had this conversation.”
“As you wish my dear friend,” said Marianne, rising to go to her carriage. “Look after yourself. We are in uncharted waters, and I fear there are some unknown enemies around us.” She kissedOlivia gently on her cheek. “You never lost your beauty. You are one of the most beautiful people I know, both in appearance and spirit.”
And with that Marianne was gone, leaving Olivia exhausted, but content to know that she had friends and family who cared for her.
Chapter 14
“Colin, you’ve been in high dudgeons all day. You haven’t been able to settle to anything.” said Marcus with frustration.
“Do you think Jocelyn doesn’t wish to see me anymore?” said Colin in despondent misery. He put down the book he was supposedly reading with a loud thud and stood up to go over to the window.
“Of course not. I suspect Lady Jocelyn was merely out this afternoon,” Marcus assured him, unable to admit that he felt a frisson of fear that the real reason might be that Lady Olivia had chosen not to see him.
He pushed away that fear, locking it tightly away. His emotions around Lady Olivia Sherwyn were proving to be a tumult of tempestuous uncertainty.
I feel adrift in a stormy sea. I’ve no idea where this is going to end up.
I dislike being in London,he thought in passing.Everything seems so complicated.
“It’s raining so heavily we can’t call and suggest a carriage ride,” Colin continued despondently, totally unaware he had lost his listener to his own thoughts.
“And yesterday they didn’t want to see us.” Colin picked up the book and put it down again. “I just know that Hastings, with his smooth manner, and his so-called romantic gifts of flowers, is succeeding in winning Jocelyn’s favor.”
“Colin, you might stop to reflect for a moment that ladies like flowers, they search for romance. That’s the whole point of a society season. Everyone is searching for love. You found Lady Jocelyn on our very first evening in town. Maybe you should look around at other eligible debutantes?”
This time the book fell to the floor, a loud clatter echoing around the room. Marcus decided he needed to properly listen to his friend, who seemed more distressed than he’d realized.
“Look around at other young ladies? Marcus, why on earth would I want to do that? I’ve found the most beautiful, kind and considerate young lady in London.”
Marcus looked at his friend intently. He could see Colin was serious. He must be head over heels in love with Lady Jocelyn.
And I believe he has a fair chance of remaining so for the rest of his life,mused Marcus.
