Her smile was light and warm, bringing back fond memories of his childhood and his mother’s love. Helena Sinclair had been a constant in his life despite any turmoil tossed his way.
“I am stretching myself a little thin these days. I only want to make you and Father proud.” He reached up and cupped her hand in his, feeling the warmth seeping through her fingers.
“Oh, but you are, my dearest if only you knew just how proud we are of you. I wish you would find a lovely young woman and settle down; having a stable partner would do you a world of good,” she said with the loving concern of a mother who only wanted the best for her only son.
“There will be time enough for that in the future, Mama. Right now, I have to see to Father’s business dealings,” he said, trying to reassure her as best he could despite the emptiness he felt in his chest. Jameson wasn’t sure if it was because of the years that had gone by or the steady ticking of the clock in his mind, but his heart yearned for something more in life.
“I want you to be happy, my dearest, and a couple of grandchildren wouldn’t harm the equation either,” she said with a mischievous glint in her eyes.
Feeling the mirth building within his chest, he leaned his head back and laughed from the pit of his stomach. “Thank you, Mama, I haven’t laughed like that in quite a long time.” He wiped his eyes with the back of his hand once he’d stopped laughing.
“I’m not sure what you find so amusing. I want grandchildren from you, and I’m not afraid to admit it. I didn’t go through hours of labour just so that you can lay back and not give me any grandbabies.” Lady Helena pursed her lips and pretended to scold her son with a loving look of warmth and affection in her eyes.
“It’s just that I was wondering earlier when you would be broaching the subject again.” Jameson chuckled and shook his head.
“I do not bring it up that often. I only bring it up when it seems necessary to remind you of my wishes.” Helena playfully swatted his arm with a mock look of shock.
Taking his mother’s hand in his, Jameson looped her fingers over his arm, leading her into the great hall. “Whether you like to admit it or not, Mama, you have a schedule by which you like to remind me of the grandchildren you desire. You are a creature of habit if nothing else,” he teased her with a playful wink.
“Away with your teasing.” His mother laughed and squeezed his arm.
“There is something I wanted to show you, Mama. I’ve been composing a new song in my free time,” he casually explained as they made their way towards the pianoforte.
The grand hall was big enough to host a ball of two hundred people or more. The marble floor shone brilliantly in the late afternoon sun that filtered through the large glass doors on either side of the room.
Yet it was the chandelier that drew the most attention upon closer inspection. Hundreds of candle holders glimmered in the light, boasting polished silver mouldings as they awaited the next ball or social event.
“Have a seat beside me.” Jameson guided his mother over to the bench in front of the mahogany pianoforte. The polished piece had been a gift from Lady Helena herself when she realized that her son showed musical talents beyond his years as a child.
“I’m sure that I will love it,” she said with a contented smile as she waited for her son to take the seat beside her, her eyes shimmering with pride.
Jameson took up his position, shifting the tails of his coat behind him as he made himself comfortable on the bench. His mind was never at ease as much as it was when he played the songs he’d composed. Music had become a constant source of relief for him in the days of the scandal, providing his mind with a much-needed escape.
Fingers danced across ivory keys, creating solid melodies that filled the room with an enchanting song. The burdens of worry suddenly faded into oblivion as Jameson played his original composition with ease. The heavy notes carried a semblance of sadness that wrenched his heart, depicting the inexplicable longing he felt within his chest.
Watching his mother from the corner of his eyes, he noticed the way her hands were poised to join his song, uncertain but ready. Turning his head, he smiled at her, giving her the go-ahead to add her expertise.
Falling into step with ease, Lady Helena began to add a sweeter melody that complemented the harsh notes of the ballad her son had composed.
Jameson shut his eyes and took a deep breath, allowing the notes to wash over his soul as they both finished on opposite notes.
“That was quite something.” She turned to him with tears in her eyes.
“It came to me early this morning; it was almost as if I were remembering a sadness and longing I hadn’t experienced yet. I know that doesn’t make any sense,” he added afterwards with a heavy sigh, lowering his hands onto his lap.
“It makes perfect sense, my dear.” Lady Helena placed her hand on his chin and gently guided his face until he was looking at her.
The moment between mother and son seemed filled with things unsaid yet still understood as he waited for her to speak once again.
“Your song seems harsh because you haven’t yet found the sweetness that your heart and soul long for.” She seemed sad as she smiled at him.
“The notes you added seemed to cheer things up,” he added half-heartedly in an attempt to cheer her up. He hadn’t meant to make her sad with the song he’d composed in the early hours of the morning.
“No, you need another kind of sweetness that cannot be found in maternal love. There will come a time when you realize just what that sweetness is.” She shook her head and continued to smile sadly at him.
Starting at the wisdom in his mother’s eyes, Jameson wondered if she was alluding to a partner or something else entirely. “You don’t think you could cut to the chase and tell me what that something is?” he asked, attempting a light-hearted joke.
“Absolutely not, but I would like you to accompany your father and me to the ball tomorrow night. I know you don’t like those kinds of things, but I think it will do you a world of good to get out and focus on something other than business with your father.” She shook her head again and chuckled before sounding more serious.
