Chapter 14
With a light step, Rachel went into the library to see William there, gazing out the window with an empty look on his face. She stopped short in her. Never before had she seen William with such a downcast, worried, dark, tumultuous look, and instantly she grew concerned.
After casting a nervous look over her shoulder and seeing no one there, she went to his side. “William? What is the matter?”
He turned to her and quickly masked his expression with a pretend smile. “Nothing.”
Her eyes skipped over his face, noting the tightness that still lingered there. “I can see that something is bothering you. What is it? What changed from this morning?”
He rubbed a hand over his face. “I’m sorry; I should have told you but our conversation this morning took precedence. I had not slept last night, and I am feeling a bit off now.”
“Oh,” Rachel said. That would explain the tight look he had, but she still felt that he was hiding something from her even with that justification. “I’m sorry. We can postpone the sitting if you would like.”
“No, no,” he shook his head. “About that. We are already done here, and I think it's time to move to the last location. The garden.”
“I had not realized,” Rachel murmured as she turned to look. “Where in the garden, though?”
“I had thought the gazebo would be best,” he mentioned while going to his folded easel. “You can sit comfortably, and your dress will not get dirtied. I think you should get Miss Colton to carry some pillows and a pitcher of drinks in case you get thirsty.”
“Go ahead of me,” Rachel advised. “I will be there soon.”
When he went off, she turned to her room and found Jane there. After sharing the new developments with Jane, she made sure her hair was fixed and left for the garden. William was ready for her with his easel ready and pencil set.
After Jane set the pillows down, Rachel sat sideways and gave William a tender smile—one he did not return or even see. It sent a lance of pain through her heart. Her gaze drifted to the rose bushes, and she tried to fight off the bereft feeling taking precedence in her breast.
Why is he shutting me out?
“Keep that pose…please.” William’s quiet words nearly had her jumping in shock, but she gave the most unperceivable of nods and kept her gaze on the flowers.
She heard the soft scratches of William’s pencils and breathed in the soft perfumed air, a medley of scents from the wildflowers all around them. The sky was starting to lose the greyish shade in favor of a bright blue.
Keeping her gaze neutral, Rachel tried to keep some levity in her heart. Perhaps William was not hiding anything from her; perhaps he was just as tired as he said he was. She could give him her faith that he was telling the truth. After all, wasn’t what people in love did?
***
Hours later, when William broke the sitting for her to go ready for her midday meal, Rachel found herself summoned to her father’s study. As he had been absent from the house the past few days, Rachel felt anxious about what he was summoning her for.
But as she neared the door, the ominous feeling that this meeting was about her marriage to Lord Strathmore wrapped around her chest like a vice. She knocked briskly and got permitted to enter. Rachel stepped in and stood a foot away from the desk.
Her father looked up, “Sit.”
Taking the chair there, Rachel quietly waited for him to stop writing on a ledger and close it. He then put it to the side. “Your mother is telling me that you do not want to marry Strathmore. Why is that? As far as I see, you should be happy about this Lord proposing to marry you. Is he not the younger lord you so emphatically demanded to have?”
Rachel had expected that he would trap her with her words. “I know, Father, but he is not a family man. From what I have gleaned from our conversation, he cares little for women. He dismisses his mother and sister as if they were not important to him. Why would I marry a man like that? God forbid we have girl children. Would he ignore her too?”
Her father’s lips thinned. “You are talking nonsense.”
“Father!”
“Listen, Rachel, you have gotten what you want in the Lord you want to marry, and your mother and I are more than satisfied with how the man is going to provide for you and do well by you. Now stop this nonsense and start looking forward to your marriage.”
“But—”
“But nothing,” he said. “I have spoken, and I trust you will listen to me and do what I say. Now go and prepare for your midday meal.”
Knowing that they were no chance for her changing her father’s mind, Rachel clamped her lips shut and stood. “Yes, Father.”
She left the room, but with no twinge of hunger, she found a book and took a seat. The book was opened on her lap, but she did not read a word. Instead, she was fuming while anger, desperation, and despondency began to make a caustic mix inside her heart.
