“We are to part ways, I know,” she said while resting her head on his shoulder. “But I wish you would not. I am terrified of so many things, William. I fear getting married to a man who will only be a tool in my parents’ arsenal. And I was scared to admit that I care for you more than I should. I could barely sleep at night.”
“You haunt my dreams,” William kissed the top of her head. “I have not fallen in love with a woman before. I have been smitten, and yes, I have been with women before but never have I felt as if my heart would leave my body if anything happened to you. And I can only think why. You have captivated my mind.”
“I am terrified to love you when I know nothing can come from it,” Rachel replied. “I feel as if I am being foolish. Why hope for something that I cannot gain?”
“Sadly, logic does not match with emotions,” William said. “It is a battle that I have jousted in for some long nights.”
“I’m glad you came to talk to me,” Rachel said quietly. “At least, if I do get married off, I will have these memories to hold dear.”
William wanted to object, but he could not. She was right—he would hold the remembrances dear.
“You have had a hard day,” William said. He cradled her face in his hands and kissed her forehead, her eyelids, her cheeks. “For as long I am here, you are not alone. I will be here and help you as long as I can.”
“Thank you.” Rachel leaned into his chest and inhaled his smell, an earthy mixture of plain soap and citrus.
Tilting her head upward, he looked straight into her intense blue eyes and was lost in the deep, tender gaze. “I am here for you, sweetling.
He gave into his constant craving and kissed her. Their mouths fused, his tongue delving into sweet lips. When she shyly sucked on his tongue, he felt that a jolt all down to his groin. Rachel pulled away a little and smiled.
“I have to go rest,” she said. “Now that I know you feel the same way I do, I can sleep.”
Laughing, William said, “I am glad that I could help.”
Her hand slipped from his in a sinuous slide, and he watched as she left the library. Sagging into the seat, he rubbed his face and then adjusted himself in his trousers. His smalls were tight under his trousers, and he ached to relieve himself.
Heaving himself up from the seat, he left the library to his room and got to his room. Closing the door, he shed his clothes and sank to his bed only in his smalls. He knew a dream about Rachel was imminent and for the first time in days, and now knowing that she felt the same way he did, William did not fear what he would dream. He welcomed it.
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Chapter 13
“My Lady,” Jane whispered in fear. “Where were you? It is past midnight!”
Looking at her maid with a lighter heart than she had felt in days, Rachel smiled as she moved to her bed. “Do not worry, Jane. I am fine.”
“I can see that, but what took you so long?” Jane pressed.
“I was speaking to William,” she responded while slipping under the covers. “I realized that I have been avoiding him for nothing. I was scared of admitting my feelings to him or even looking at him for fear that he would see through me. To my shock—he feels the same.”
Jane perched on the edge of her bed. “He feels the same? As in—?”
“He cares for me, just as I care for him,” Rachel said while being careful not to utter the love word. “He is a gentle, loving, and understanding man, Jane. If my life had been different and I would have met him some other ways, I would have chosen him to marry.”
“I—” Jane shook her head. “I am stunned. But since you mentioned marriage, what are you going to do? Lord Strathmore is going to be your husband soon. Isn’t he?”
The lightened emotions in her heart shrunk and shriveled into nothing. The fantasy that she had allowed herself to live just minutes ago was now nothing but a puff of smoke. The reality that she was going to marry a man she did not like was now as heavy as a boulder on her heart.
“Please do not remind me,” she sighed. “I want to dream just a little more.”
Jane shook her head. “I do hope that you know what you are doing, My Lady. This seems as if you are playing with fire.”
“If I marry that man, I am already burned,” Rachel muttered while turning away. “I would like to live a little freedom while I can.”
***
The darkness of the room she was in had icy terror sinking into her soul, and a dank air filled her lungs while she struggled against the bonds that bound her hands over her head.
A wicked, devious laugh had her heart pounding out of rhythm. “Do you think you could ever escape me?”
