Laughing, I tuck her tighter into me and then glance out at the wall of white still swirling around us.
She looks out the window and sighs. “How long do you think this will last?”
“Whatever it lasts, I’m happy to spend all of it with you.”
“Same, Jax, same.”
She curls into me and sighs.
“Problem, Red?”
“No. I’m just wondering if you’re okay with what happened here?”
Her head lifts off my chest and she props her little pointed chin on her arm. “Oh, I couldn’t possibly be more okay, Jax.” Her little giggle makes me smile.
Damn, I can’t believe how much I lo-lo-
I close my eyes for a second and take a deep breath. I love Aspen Archer.
How does she feel about me?
I desperately want to know but for right now, I need to take care of my woman.
That stops me in my tracks.My woman.
I don’t know how I didn’t realize it as soon as I saw her but there it is. Basic. Perfect. Mine.
But underneath all of that is a little niggling fear that she’ll disappear or something will happen to her. What am I going to do if…?
My heart races, my breath coming in sudden pants. I fight to keep my head from spiraling so far out of control but it’s so damn hard.
Caring means death. That’s what I’ve always seen. It started with my parents and my grandmother but it didn’t end there. Every tour overseas meant losing another friend, anothercomrade in arms that doesn’t come home. That I can’t call anymore. Can’t have a beer with and catch up with.
My whole body feels numb. I can’t even feel Red settled in against my side anymore. Her breath is slow and steady and I know that she’s sleeping soundly in my arms, safe and secure. But horrific visions race through my head like a wildfire.
What if there’s a car accident and she doesn’t come home? What if she runs into a car jacker and they take her away from me and she never comes home? What if one day she just disappears and I don’t know if she left of her own volition or if some sick son of a bitch takes her away from me? How the hell am I supposed to go on if she’s not around anymore?
Drawing in a deep, shuddering breath, I fight the wild images and thoughts in my head threatening to bury me in dark misery.
My phone rings and I jump, my breath coming out in a shaky mutter as I grab it.
“Hey, Sergeant. Have you seen Aspen Archer? One of the deputies went past her place and there weren’t any lights on and there were a few of her clients in front of the place. They said she was supposed to be there.”
“Uh, sorry, Sheriff. We got caught up on the mountain. I’m hoping that the storm lets up pretty soon so we can hit the road back to her place.”
“Are you alright? If you need a ride I can send one of the deputies up there to get y’all.”
I’m shaking my head before he finishes his thought. “No. We’re good.” Squinting out the windshield, I sigh, running my hand through my hair. “It’s slowing down. I think we should be able to start back in about ten minutes.”
“Okay. But if you need anything, just let me know. There’s someone around to help, you know.”
“I know. Thanks, Sheriff.” I hang up the phone and look up straight into Aspen’s hopeful sage green eyes. She smiles shyly and my whole body freezes.
“So…?”
“So I’m gonna take you home and then I need to run home myself. My dog, Bella, needs picked up from my friend’s house. I wasn’t sure how late I was going to be so I left her with a neighbor but she’s gonna be ready to get home.”
“Oh.” She sits up and I hate the look in her eyes. She’s drawing back in on herself.
