Grace picked up on the utter fear emanating from his every pore, instantly feeling guilty. This was more than his ego putting in an appearance as she had first thought, it was much worse – he was terrified.
The sweat began to run down his forehead and back, his eyes fixed on the doorway. Nearly there, just a few more hurried steps and they’d be inside facing a whole new set of complications.
The waiter embarked on showing them to a table in the window until Grace intervened asking to be seated near the back out of the way. She figured that a window seat was a step too far right now. Alex hid behind the huge menu trying to calm his breathing to somewhere near normal. Grace reached across thetable taking his hand in hers. “I’m sorry, I didn’t realise. Nobody is looking at you, promise. See, check for yourself.”
Lowering the menu he cautiously glanced around the room. The other patrons were engrossed in their own conversations, tucking into what looked like amazing food. Okay, maybe he had overreacted a little. His breathing slowed to his normal rate as the spots dispersed, returning his vision to normal. Grace filled his glass with ice cold water which he gulped down, trying to rehydrate his nerve parched mouth.
“Sorry...it just freaks me out, all the attention that follows the band. They don’t have any regard for personal space. It gets crazy... I don’t know what they want from me.” His eyes continued to dart around the room, checking out his exit options should things turn ugly.
She had witnessed firsthand now the terror that oozed from him, engulfed him even. Placing their order she ran a thumb across his knuckles, trying to ease his distress, somehow take away the fear she could see across his face.
“Is it always this bad for you? I mean the panic, the worry.” She eyed him cautiously, not wanting to tip him over the edge again.
“It didn’t used to be. I used to love being on stage,performing. Then I just felt crap waiting to go on but was okay when I started singing. Now...well... now it takes over everything. Getting on stage, getting through a whole set, going out in public. I mean, it’s not normal, they’re not normal. Everyone wants a piece of me. They’re not content with an autograph; they want so much more these days. It’s just so out of control.” His voice was barely a whisper as he spoke, his face searching hers for some kind of sign that she understood.
“Let’s just eat and go, eh? Back to the lighthouse.” Her mouth turned up slightly at one corner, reassuring him that she understood. Nodding, he began to tuck into the plate of food before him.
Standing on the deck of the lighthouse, once more mesmerized by the view of the sea, Grace waited for her boyfriend to return with two large mugs of coffee. It really was spellbinding, situated so far out on the cliff edge they were overlooked by no-one, adding to the feeling that they could be at the end of the earth. Leaning over the balcony she could make out the man made stairway which led down to the rocky shore line.
Alex’s phone buzzed on the table, startling them both out of their daydream.
“Hi, Iz. What’s up? No, I don’t need to go to that. Ben said he would cover it, ring him... what is it withyou two? I don’t get you at all...hey why don’t you go with him? You could represent me...” Alex moved the receiver away from his ear sharply. “Whoa, you nearly deafened me! No need to shout, it was only a suggestion. Okay, see ya soon.” Sighing he dropped his phone back onto the table.
“Everything okay?” Grace moved to stand in front of him, wrapping her arms around his waist as she gazed into his eyes. “Do you need to go home?”
“No, it’s just an awards thing we got nominated for but I don’t need to be there. Ben will take care of it. I hate those things anyway. They’re full of people who are so far up their own backsides it’s untrue.” Alex tightened his grip on her, loving the feeling of having her in his arms.
“I am beginning to think you don’t like your job!” Placing her hands on his chest, she gently pushed back to allow her to look into his eyes.
“I don’t much anymore. Well, no, that’s not true. I love to sing I just hate everything that goes with being successful.” Not wanting to burden her with all his woes he grabbed her hand, leading her towards the edge of the surrounding wall, through a gate and down the staircase onto the shoreline, not releasing the tight grip he had maintained on her small hand.
Guiding the diminutive girl across the rockysurface he found a perfect place to sit. Somewhere that offered them the best view of the ocean but still sheltered them from prying eyes. Steering her to sit in front of him, he cradled her in his arms, revelling in the feel of her back rested against his chest as she laid her head against his shoulder. Alex felt like he had found his own nirvana right here on the shoreline of Scotland. What more would anyone ever need? He would give up his life to be here right now with this girl in his arms. Drawing her in tighter still he nuzzled her neck, trailing soft biting kisses down to the junction of her shoulder before resting his cheek against hers.
“Happy?” he whispered to her tenderly.
“Very. Can we come back tonight to watch the sunset? I bet it’s beautiful.”
“Just like you, but no we can’t watch it from here ‘cos I wanna show you it from the top of the observation deck. If you like this, then the upstairs deck at sunset will blow your mind,” he murmured softly, allowing his eyes to fix back on the ocean as it rolled and crashed against the cove.
“This reminds me of a lullaby my mum used to sing to me when I was small. I can’t remember what it’s called but it was all about the baby’s dreams reflected like oceans in his mother’s eyes, or something like that anyway. She sang it every night for years.” Graceclosed her eyes as she began humming the tune to the long forgotten rhyme, adding in the odd word that she could remember, unsure if she was recalling it correctly.
“I know that. It’s called something likeWould You Know. I think that’s it, anyway.” Alex joined in with his girlfriend only his humming was soon replaced by his yielding trademark voice as he began to sing melodiously low, almost whispering the words to her. Grace’s eyes shot open in glee, watching the man she was falling for sing as the mellow lyrics rolled off of his tongue, transporting her right back to her childhood. As he concluded the private recital he turned to look at her. Lifting his hand he cautiously wiped the tear that had spilled down her cheek. “Was I that bad? I know it’s been a few weeks but I thought I nailed that.” He winked at her as she held his gaze with those beautiful green eyes. God, he could get lost in those eyes. He fought back the overpowering urge he had to wrap her in his arms and hide her away from the rest of the world. He couldn’t stand the thought of her not being by his side.
“Oh no, you did. That was incredible. You have no idea what that song means to me.” Leaning closer she placed a chaste kiss on his lips. “Thank you, I couldn’t remember it properly.” She almost breathed the words.
Unable to stop the grin spreading across his face he kissed her back. “Come on, you’re getting cold.” Standing, he helped her to her feet before he crouched down low. “Hop on, I’ll carry you to the steps.”
Not needing any further encouragement she leapt onto his back wrapping her arms and legs around him as she did, securing herself to his well muscled frame. A girl could get used to this.
Standing he regained his balance before hitching her higher up onto his back, centring her weight. Turning to take a last look at the ocean he chuckled. “Hold tight, Gracie!”
Increasing her grip on him she squealed with delight as he set off at a roaring pace, running along the rocky beach towards the steps.
Lounging in the observation room later that day they sat beneath the glass dome that completely encased the tower. Listening to music in companionable silence they took in the panoramic 360 degree view. Alex nonchalantly slung his arm around Grace’s shoulders when he noticed her shiver, rubbing his hand up and down her arm trying to bring warmth. Grace snuggled in tighter, shifting slightly onto her side as she slid her arm across his stomach, pulling him in towards her. It was cold up there but she wasn’t ready to break the party up just yet. Reaching over the arm of the sofa he fished around on the floor before producing the throw he had discarded earlier in the day. Tucking it in around them, he cocooned them together.
Reclining back on the couch, Grace nestled into his side again, enveloped in the heavy blanket. Alexwas overcome by a feeling of complete peace; something which he didn’t have in his day to day life. His chin rested atop her head, he pulled her in closer as he sighed deeply before sipping his drink. This moment right here was what he had waited his whole life for. It was getting late and he knew before too long she would leave him to go to her room for the night. Unsure how he was going to cope knowing she was a few feet away from him in the same building; it was torturous. Normality was what he craved though. If it meant he could carve a normal relationship with Grace then that’s what he would do.
“It’s your own piece of heaven right here, isn’t it? How did you find this place? If I were you I would never want to leave,” Grace almost whispered.
