Shaken, I sank onto the nearest chair while he pounded up the stairs.
28
Kinsley
It shocked me to wake up the next morning and find Burke in bed with me. I assumed he was both pissed enough and deep enough into his business that he wouldn't bother to join me. I'd had a long moment of doubt where I almost went back to my old room to sleep, but I couldn't run now. Standing my ground was the answer, I just had to figure out how to balance myself on the shaky ground which was now my foundation.
Slipping quietly out of bed, I took a quick shower and pulled my hair up. Finn would wake at any minute, and I wanted to get to the nursery before that happened. I turned off the monitor as soon as I entered the room so there was no way we could disturb Burke.
There had been no sight of him after our argument. He went upstairs to spend time with Finn, and I went out into the biting cold to walk through the garden. It had been on the tip of my tongue to apologize, but I didn't feel I had any reason to say the words. It hurt to think he would spend most of our marriage holed up in his office, but maybe he had no choice. In a way, I knew what I was getting myself into all those months before in Chester. Loneliness and desperation made me turn to a criminal for validation, and I had to live with the consequences of my choices.
Surprised to hear the doorknob turn, I looked over to find Burke standing just inside the nursery. He finally appeared well-rested, wearing gray sweatpants and no shirt, and I had to look away from the enticing sight of his bare, beautifully tattooed chest.
"He's not awake yet," I whispered.
I wished he would leave the room so I could flee to the kitchen, but he remained where he stood. Since he didn't respond to my statement, I wasn't sure what he wanted.
"Kinsley."
It was impossible to face him; my head refused to turn. The view out the window showed a rain-filled sky, which perfectly matched my mood. Tears tracked silently down my face, upsetting me further. The last thing I wanted was for him to see me as weak.
Burke touched my shoulder, reminding me he moved like a stealthy jungle cat. Before I could process it, he'd wrapped his arms around me and pulled my face into his chest. I sobbed, trying to bite back the sound. Stroking one hand down my hair, he shushed me.
Why could he be nice to me in the quiet of the early morning, but not in the middle of the day? Why did he offer comfort when I hadn't asked, but not when I desperately begged for it?
"Come on," he murmured, guiding me out of the nursery.
I followed him to our room, seeing that he had the baby monitor tucked in his pocket. "The one in the nursery isn't turned on," I mumbled.
Instead of responding to that, he sat on the edge of the bed and pulled me to stand between his legs. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine."
Sighing, he wiped a tear off my cheek. "Why do women say that when they don't mean it?"
"Because if I told you what was really going on in my head, you would tell me I'm overreacting." I tried to untangle myself from his arms, but he seemed determined to hold on.
"Have I ever said that to you?"
My gaze remained focused on the carpet. "No, I don't think you have."
"What can I do, Kinsley?"
"Honestly, I don't know at this point." When he tilted my chin up, I had no choice but to look at his face. "I mean it. I feel bad about yesterday, but I'm not wrong."
"No, you're not wrong."
Both of my brows went up. "I didn't expect you to admit it."
Scrubbing a hand over the stubble on his chin, he said, "You wouldn't take anything seriously. Each time I mentioned your guards, you laughed it off. With Daisy here, and you so far along with our son, I had to protect you both. If lying was what it took to make you take precautions, then I felt it was worth it."
"And at no point when we were being open and honest about what you do for a living did it occur to you to rectify that lie?"
"I didn't even remember discussing the bomb with you." He spread his hands between us. "It's true that Carson and I were injured in the blast. He’s been trying to undermine me and wedge himself in where he doesn't belong. He wasn't invited, but someone leaked the meeting to him and he showed up at a dangerous time. We were supposed to stay back from the building, but he ruined that plan."
The blast he'd said killed over twenty men. I gripped his hands. "Why did you set the bomb?"
"The Peralta Family took out a hit on me for killing their spy, who was also the son of the boss's brother."
