"Because you're blind as a bat, apparently."
Burke shifted closer to block my only means of exit. "Why did we get along so well in Chester, but now we can't be in the same room without bickering?"
Huffing, I relented on my escape and sat back against the cushions once more. "You really want to do this now, on the day you swore was meant to be about light and laughter?"
"Pretty sure that's not what I said."
"Just answer me. Do you want to rehash what happened, or do you want to resume avoiding each other at every opportunity?"
Running a hand through his hair, he asked, "Would it change anything if we talked about it?"
"Doubtful. You don't strike me as the type of man to atone for his sins."
"My sins?"
"You aren't suggesting they're mine?"
He sighed. "No, I can't blame you for anything, except the shrew you've become."
Eyes narrowed, cheeks heated, I was mad enough to spit. "That right there is what I'm talking about. Why should I smooth your ego when you knocked me up and left me all alone? You walked away without a backward glance, ruining my life in the process. When do you plan to take responsibility for what you caused?"
"I admit the pregnancy is my fault. I should have realized you wouldn't be on birth control, but I lost my mind for most of that month."
Tears built up until they spilled over. "I know I was a mistake in your world, an accident, and I know you regret that you're saddled with me until death do us part. I willingly went to your bed knowing you'd leave me, so I guess I was stupid to have expected a different outcome."
"I had a thousand hopes for us, Kinsley, but they weren't meant to be."
Those words hurt more than I could possibly express. I'd had hopes for us too, only I'd known upfront they were useless. "No, I suppose not."
Wordlessly, he stood and held out a hand. I took it, allowing him to help me up. He remained where he was, and I understood he'd given me the means to get away. Too bad it was only a temporary reprieve, because I'd just bound myself to the devil for eternity.
16
Burke
I didn't know how I'd managed to fuck up our wedding day so thoroughly, but I had. Nothing was as it should have been; not the idea of us being alone, not the things I'd said, and certainly not Kinsley's reactions. I wanted her to understand I would do anything for her and that I would protect her at all costs, but she'd taken the conversation in an entirely different direction. She was angry with me for leaving her, and I couldn't blame her. Now, we were in an insufferable situation, one I fully accepted I'd created.
But what choice did I have? Selfishly, I craved her, and I loved the baby already. For the time being, that had to be enough, because I had to deal with the other Families trying to get revenge for the bombings. Some of them were pissed enough to take out whoever they saw in their path, while others were digging deeply. I had confidence there would be nothing to find no matter how much they dug, but there was never a way to know for certain. Not to mention, now the Peralta territory had to be divided up among the last remaining Families. The situation was like a powder keg, and several people held the matches.
Since my son was due soon, I wanted to discuss baby names with Kinsley. I hoped we could have a normal conversation about it, but knew that wasn't likely to happen. Tracking her down was simple, at least.
"Knock, knock," I said as I tapped her open door with my knuckles.
Kinsley looked up from the book she read. "Hi."
"Do you have a minute for a conversation?"
"About what?" she asked warily, setting her book aside.
Despite her not inviting me in, I crossed the threshold, choosing to sit in the overstuffed white armchair across from hers. She'd done a marvelous job of updating the bedroom from stuffy antiques to fresh, clean lines. "Baby names."
Her expression cleared. "Okay, sure."
Concerned by her casual tone, I felt my defenses go up immediately. "I'd like to go with something traditionally Irish."
She pursed her lips. "I'm not against that."
"Oh. Good." Surprised at how easy she was making it, I relaxed into the chair.
