Devon choked on the water, causing Caleb to guffaw.
When he could breathe again, he said, “What the hell?”
“Timed it just right, I’d say.” Caleb grinned and hummed a tune as he finished off the section he was working on.
“Why are we talking about Chloe?”
“I would have thought it was obvious, but let me spell it out. She likes you. She’s not ugly. She fits in with the family. Hailey loves her.” As he made each point, he ticked them off on his fingers.
“I can’t say I realized any of this.” Okay, maybe he noticed she’s not ugly. “She is good with Hailey, but that’s not a reason to date somebody.”
“Not a reason not to, either.” All serious, Caleb met his brother’s gaze, held it steady. “All I’m saying is, it wouldn't kill you to find some happiness again.”
“I love my wife.”
Caleb’s tone gentled, even as he toughened his words. “Kathy is dead, Devon. You aren't.”
“There’s no way I could ever love anyone the way I loved Kathy.” He felt the claws ripping their way up his throat, tried to smother them with more water. He breathed deliberately, evenly. Slowly.
“Look, I’m not saying it would be the same. Of course it’ll be different. But that doesn't mean it isn't as strong or as good.” He walked over to Devon, put his hand on his shoulder. “Sometimes you can find happiness when you aren't looking for it.”
“I don’t even know what to say to that.”
Caleb shrugged and went back to work. “Just think about it.”
He thought about it, all right. Couldn't stop thinking about it as he finished his workday and went home. His parents were heading out of town for a few days, and Devon found his father packing in his bedroom.
“Dad, can I talk to you?”
“Of course, son.” Don set aside the sweater he held and sat on the edge of the bed by his suitcase.
Devon remained standing, paced the room, and came back. “Do you think true love is a one time deal?”
Don smiled warmly. “No. I think there are levels of true love, if you will.”
Devon sank into an armchair by the window. “What do you mean?”
“When I was in high school, I was in love. Head-over-heels in love with Mary Ellen, the senior editor of the school paper. She and I had everything in common.” His smile changed, became nostalgic. “Mary Ellen was my One with a capital O. She and I were made for each other. We had plans to get married, and I prayed it would work out. She was my dream.”
“What happened?”
“You don’t realize how first love can feel like the end-all, be-all even when it’s not. You don't realize that sometimes it’s only so intense because it’s all you’ve ever known.” Don pointed to the picture of Kathy and Hailey on the bookshelf. “She was your first love, Devon. There’s no telling if the two of you would have been happy all your lives.”
“We would have.”
“I understand your vehemence. The two of you were very compatible, and you're the constant sort. You would have made your marriage work.”
“So what are you saying?” Devon asked impatiently.
“I’m saying some people love more than one person at a time and have to choose, or have both. I’m saying some people fall in and out of love at the snap of their fingers. And, most of all, thank God I met Lydia before I married Mary Ellen.”
Devon left the room feeling more confused than ever. If what he’d had with Kathy was just the rush of first love, did that mean there was more out there for him? Had he buried his head in the sand because he assumed there was no point in finding second best?
His cell phone rang, and he fished it out of his pocket as he headed into the kitchen.
“Hello?”
“Devon, it’s John. Alicia wanted me to give you a head’s up.”
