Unfortunately, gathering the petty Kings would be impossible at this time of year—they would be wintering in their halls and would not risk travelling. So, they had to make do with messengers sent out on the few trading ships leaving the harbour. Agnar didn’t want to send out his own ships as it would reduce their warriors and Skadi agreed wholeheartedly.
They worked together well and she no longer feared his taking control of Thrudheim. He always discussed big decisions with her, their conversations thorough and interesting, usually agreeing on a solution quickly that suited them both. She’d quickly allowed him free rein to make their military decisions, as he was far more of an expert in that area, and he seemed pleased by her confidence in him.
The only decision that had displeased Skadi was minor and was due to her own doubts and insecurities, she couldn’t even criticise Agnar for it. He’d commissioned the building of a new longship, which he’d namedSea Queen.
It had reminded her of Heimdall’s obsession with raiding and she did not want Agnar to leave her. She viewed the ship as if it were a young second wife, a dangerous temptation that would eventually lead her husband’s affections away from her.
However, she was too proud to tell him so. To be jealous of a longship seemed ridiculous even to her, so she remained silent whenever he spoke of it, or asked for her opinion on its plans.
For some reason she hadn’t yet confessed her feelings for him. Still afraid that they wouldn’t be returned.
Why spoil something that was working so well?
In the bedchamber they were confident of each other’s affection. Their nights were full of passion and sensual exploration. But she still couldn’t speak the words of her heart. After all, Agnar was younger…his desires could change with the direction of the wind. Heimdall’s certainly had.
Perhaps, she was too old, and burnt by the past, to confess to such girlish dreams…
Life was easier and happier with Agnar in it, and she feared that if she did anything to rock their blossoming relationship, he would disappear as Heimdall had done and she would be even lonelier than she’d been before.
She couldn’t go back to those miserable years. The pain this time would be unbearable, for both herself and Astra, who grew fonder of her saviour and hero every day.
Agnar had lifted away some of the weight of her responsibilities and eased her burdens, allowing her more time to spend with Brenna and Astra, as she did now. The three of them were enjoying a cup of warm milk and honey cakes, while Astra practised writing her runes.
Skadi doubted she would have had time to do something like this when Heimdall had been alive. Even with the threat of Sven on the horizon, she had time to enjoy the peace before the storm. Almost losing Astra had made Skadi realise how precious time with her daughter was.
So, today she had spent the morning training with sword and shield, followed by listening to petitions from her people, and now she would spend the time before Nattmal with Astra.
Of course, after Nattmal she would enjoy her night with the King. How would he take her tonight? He certainly had the stamina of a young man…
Skadi had to smother a chuckle at her own wayward thoughts and she noticed Brenna seemed deep in thought, so she asked her friend gently, ‘Is something worrying you?’
Brenna’s eyes drifted up from the honey cake she’d been lightly picking at since they sat down. ‘Vali wants to marry me. But I have…misgivings.’
Skadi tried to hide her smile by sipping her milk. ‘I thought you liked Vali now?’
Brenna sighed, ‘He’s infuriating, but…yes, I love him.’
Skadi blinked. ‘You love him? So soon?’ Brenna’s free and open admission shocked her, as Skadi couldn’t imagine declaring herself so casually.Was she wrong to hold back?Brenna was so similar to her, opinionated and slow to trust, but ifshecould confess the truth of her heart, why couldn’t Skadi?
Brenna smiled and nodded shyly. ‘I have never felt this way about anyone else before. It is why I never considered marriage until… Well, Vali.’
Guilt curdled in Skadi’s stomach. ‘Because you saw how it was between Heimdall and me and you were too afraid to take the risk?’
Brenna’s face dropped and she answered kindly, ‘No, that wasn’t why. It was because I had no reason to. I was protected by you. I had a home and a purpose at your side, I could afford the luxury of waiting for true love.’
Skadi frowned, not understanding the reason for Brenna’s misgivings. ‘I hope you are not having doubts because of me. I would never wish to hold you back, if you wish to go and be a wife—’
Brenna chuckled and waved a hand dismissively. ‘I know that. I have loved working beside you for the good of Thrudheim and hope to continue doing so for the rest of my life. Vali understands that… In a way it’s lucky he is Agnar’s second. No, my misgivings are because I do not wish to marry without my mother witnessing it. But Vali is adamant that we marry before the spring. There is talk that Sven will attack during the spring thaw and that is only a couple of months away. He doesn’t want to risk dying in battle without legitimising our union in the eyes of the gods…’ Tears gathered in Brenna’s eyes and Skadi leaned across to hug her, then gathered her hands in hers.
‘You do not have to do anything you do not wish to do. I will ask Agnar to speak with him.’
Brenna nodded miserably. ‘But… I dowantto marry him. When I imagined my wedding, I always presumed it would be in the village, with my mother as Gothi.’
Skadi thought for a moment and then squeezed her hands. ‘How about a small ceremony at Thrudheim’s shrine, followed by a second ceremony at the village in the summer? Once the threat of Sven has passed?’
Brenna’s face flushed and she couldn’t meet her eyes. ‘How could I demand two ceremonies when you barely had one proper wedding with Agnar?’
Skadi laughed, glad something so simple was the only thing holding Brenna back. ‘Well then, I shall do the same! A big midsummer feast for both our marriages, and to celebrate the survival of Thrudheim.’
