Finally, she found enough sense to lift her hand to push him away. But when her hands met the cloth of his tunic, he deepened the kiss. Sliding his hand from her jaw to cup the back of her head, he then slipped his tongue between her lips to taste her.
The lights of the sky swirled behind her eyelids as his tongue stroked against hers in a way that made her body ache with longing. Her fingers dug into the wool of his tunic and she clung to him, afraid to lose this moment of bliss.
It was as precious and as fleeting as the beautiful night that rippled overhead. Had he meant what he’d said? They were the sweetest words she had ever heard from a man. She wasn’t a burden, and she didn’t have to earn her place with him, as she did in Gudvangen. He wanted her, needed her, was glad she was with him.
Did she really give him purpose?
And when he had spoken of long, dark nights, she had been overwhelmed by wicked thoughts of their bodies entangled in the sheets of his bed. His warmth surrounding her, keeping her safe from the dark.
They were almost words of love. But not quite...
No, she was probably seeing far more depth of feeling than was actually there.
‘Men do not love like women,’Gertrud had once said.
Gertrud!She pushed him away, breaking the kiss abruptly, as thoughts of her half-sister flooded her mind.Was it a betrayal to kiss the same man Gertrud had once kissed?
Runar raised his head, a sleepy expression on his face, as if he were drunk from their kiss.
This madness needed to end. She did not want to be his second choice after Gertrud. Her life was already humiliating enough as it was. She would not add this to her list of many failings.
Was that why he wanted her? To somehow have back what he had once lost?
‘I...’ She shook her head, trying to clear it. Trying to find the right words to refuse him. Eventually she settled on the easiest. ‘No.’
Disappointment washed across his face, but to her relief he released her immediately.
‘I am sorry,’ he said. She could still see the brightness of lust in his eyes, and it sent an answering shiver down her spine. At least she could trustthatwas real.
But sadly, it wasn’t enough.
She had always longed for a man to kiss her like that. To speak sweet words, and hold her tight in such a romantic way. It made her want to weep that it was already doomed to fail.
Brushing and rearranging the blankets in a desperate attempt to sweep away her feelings, she gave him a false smile that hurt her cheeks. ‘No need to be sorry. It is the magic of the lights. They are said to have a power over us,’ she mumbled, about to add that she was tired but feared it might only remind them both of his bed. ‘I am thirsty... Would you like some warmed milk?’
‘Thank you,’ he replied, and she wasn’t sure if he were thanking her for the offer or for the excuse. Either way, she refused to question it further. She couldn’t look him in the eye after that scorching kiss, so she gave a little nod and hurried inside. There would be no harm in making two; Sten could always have hers if she couldn’t finish it.
The dog trotted in after her, and she focused on the task ahead. Once the warmed milk was ready, she poured it into two horns. Then with a deep breath she went back outside to face him.
Runar rose from his seat when he saw her, his eyes searching her face curiously as she handed him a horn of milk.
‘Did you not like me kissing you?’ he asked gently, as if he were afraid he had offended her in some way.
Embla stifled a groan—she had been hoping to avoid talking about it ever again. But he seemed determined to embarrass her. ‘I am not Gertrud,’ she said flatly.
He blinked and sank heavily in his seat. ‘I know that. You look nothing like her.’
She stiffened at the implication. Did he think her poor in comparison?
Of course he did! Gertrud was considered a beauty!
She took her seat with a thud and sipped her milk. The flavour as comforting as one of her mother’s hugs.
How she missed those!
‘I will go back in the spring, and it will be as if I were never here.’
He frowned, turning a little away from her and scrubbing one of his big hands down his face. ‘I like you...because I likeyou. Not because Gertrud is your sister. However, I will not kiss you again if you do not wish it.’ He looked at her directly then, as if he were passing on something of great importance. ‘But...please tell me if you change your mind.’
