"What if I never do?" He kisses my cheek back. "Are you just going to wait for me forever?"
"I'll always wait for you," I say quietly. The moonlight is reflecting in his eyes and I have to remind myself that I'm here to get the picture for my brother. I can't get distracted and pull my boyfriend away to make out with him. "But you have two years max. Neither of us are getting younger. Especially you."
Nelson wraps his arms around me from behind, holding me close. His fingers dig into my side and I try to squirm away. I feel his breath against my ear when he whispers the next words. "I won't need two years."
Headlights interrupt our conversation and we both crouch down instinctively to not be seen. Nelson was kind enough to let my brother use his truck to get up here. We used Charlie's truck, parked it a little ways back and off the path, to get up here about twenty minutes ago.
The cookout today was a huge success, even with a few hiccups. Most of those hiccups being Veronica. I introduced Nelson as my boyfriend to my family. My mom was welcoming, my dad gave him a cordial handshake but that was about it. Finnigan and Charlotte were more welcoming toward him and his family. Charlotte kept going on about how her little ones would love a place like this when they're older. Despite my parents being city people through and through, they are great at socializing and kept up steady conversations with all of those that joined the cookout.
Veronica was the only one that complained about it being dirty, about having to eat outside, also having to pick the meat straight off the grill. The food was too delicious to complain about anything. I could see Finnigan's smile falter every time she complained about something else. I don't know why he thought surprising her with a trip here was a good idea. I'm guessing she was under the impression they were going somewhere exotic and this was only a brief stop on the way. She mentioned more than once she didn't pack for 'a place like this'.
Nelson shifts beside me, dropping to his knees with a small grunt. He elbows me in the ribs when I cover my mouth to keep from laughing at him. I want to make a joke about his age, but I hold my tongue. I watch with bated breath as Finnigan opens the passenger door and helps Veronica out. Her voice travels easily to us.
"Why are we here, Finn?" I wince at the use of his nickname. You would think after two years she'd know only our mom calls him that. "This place is…"
"I was told this is the best place to look at the stars," Finnigan interrupts. "I figured we could hang out here together for a little while."
"It's so loud," Veronica says. I roll my eyes and glance over at Nelson.
I thought the same thing my first summer here. I didn't know what cicadas were until I experienced them. Walking around and hearing trees screaming at you is unnerving if you don't know what it is. Now, the noise is calming and is more like white noise to me. Especially since spending nights on the farm with Nelson. Outside of mosquitos, I love the nature on the farm. I've even been able to fall asleep a lot easier with no lights. I turn back and watch my brother lead his girlfriend toward the edge of the lookout. I turn on the camera and poise it to start catching photos of them.
They're too far away for me to make out what's being said, but the moonlight is clear enough that I can see when my brother gets down on one knee. My sister made sure that he would kneel properly for the photo. She trained him to keep his back straight, his knee steady. I snap a photo of him holding out the ring before Veronica turns and notices that he's proposing. Then I snap another as she lifts a hand to her mouth. A third one is snapped when Finnigan lowers the box to his knee.
"Bennett." Nelson's voice is quiet beside me. "I don't think that was a yes."
I hear Veronica's voice just as he says the words. "Why would you do this here? God, I thought we were going to the vacation home, not this… Shithole."
"Ouch." I slap a hand over Nelson's mouth to shush him. He grabs my wrist and lowers it, holding my hand. I'm definitely not taking anymore photos so I don't pull away.
"Seriously, Finnigan. When have I ever expressed interest in visiting a farm or being proposed to where there is no one around?" Her voice is getting louder and I look at my brother. He's standing now and I can see his shoulders are slumped forward and his face is downcast. She's not done, though. "I want to share this moment with my friends, to show off the ring. I can't do that when we're in the middle of nowhere. God, you don't even know me and you think I'm going to marry you?"
Veronica starts toward the truck and Nelson and I duck down lower, hoping to not be seen. It's dark enough that I think we're safe. I doubt Veronica is worried about anything but herself. Finnigan runs after her. I wish I didn't have to listen to the next bit of their interaction. I can tell that Finnigan is hurt, it's clear in his voice. Veronica seems indifferent to it. The final words hit hard.
"I don't want to marry you. I want to go home."
Nelson and I are left there, stunned. Neither of us move even after the truck turns around and disappears. I delete the photos from the camera even before getting a text from my brother.
"They're taking my car and he's taking her to the airport." I tilt my phone to show Nelson.
"God, I hate that."
"I was hoping I'd be wrong, but I was worried this would happen." We start walking down the path toward where we parked the truck. "You remember when he called me? He wasthinking about ending things then. I guess he was holding out hope."
I text him back an apology that it didn't go like he planned and confirm he wants me to delete the photos taken. I don't get a response back and pocket my phone. We make it back to the dwindling party within the next ten minutes. Paul and his wife are still hanging out, as are most of the people that don't have kids with bedtimes. Clark and a few of his friends are roasting marshmallows over the fire Charlie built earlier. I catch a glimpse of Clark leaning his shoulder against one of his buddies, who turns and plants a quick kiss on his cheek. I smile at the moment, but don't bring it to Nelson's attention. That's Clark's business.
Right now, my business is making sure my brother is okay. I'm surprised to see him standing by the table holding all the drinks. Veronica is nowhere in sight and all the adults seem to look slightly uncomfortable or just sad. Finnigan is the one to explain when we get close enough.
"Charlotte took her back to the hotel," he says. "She apparently doesn't want to be alone in a car with me."
"I'm sorry, man." I pull him in for a hug but I'm not sure what else to do or say.
"Guess there was no point in wanting all the family together for this," he says. He tips the red solo cup back and gulps down whatever is in it. "Now I'm just embarrassed."
I've never known my brother to be this soft. I know he wants to be married, to have a family. It's been a dream of his to pass down the family name. Since I distanced myself, figuratively and literally, I didn't realize how bad it'd gotten for him. I know he's still working in the family business and that isn't a stress free job, but I guess I forgot how good of a person he can be. He's only thirty-five, but I'm sure he's under pressure from colleagues and our parents to find someone.
"Anyway, someone please give me something else to focus on." We walk toward a group of Nelson's friends. I recognize Paul, at least. "And another beer. I think I deserve it."
"That, I can help with." Someone walks up with a beer in each hand. I don't recognize the guy. He looks to be older than Clark and his friends, but younger than myself. Mid-twenties, maybe. The guy pops the cap off expertly and hands it over to Finnigan with a smile.
