“You did,” I say. I can hear the mix of emotions in my voice. I’m relieved that he’s okay, but I’m also still scared and a little mad. Idon’t want to be mad at my Daddy, but I can’t help it. “You said you were okay.”
“I know, baby. I will be okay, I promise.”
Turning on my heel, I walk back into the house, knowing that he will follow. I sit on the couch and face him. I want nothing more than to crawl on his lap and never let him go, but I know we need to talk about this.
“What happened?” I ask. He looks sheepish. “Why did you faint?”
“I was dehydrated,” Gabe answers. “I didn’t eat breakfast, and then we wanted to get an extra practice in before the game and I forgot to eat. I was sweating a lot during the game and then I felt lightheaded.”
“Gabriel.” I’m in full work mode right now. I know that he’s my Daddy and he sets the rules and everything, but I’m in charge of making sure he’s good on the field. Ice. Whatever. I knew he was losing weight, and I brought it up to Coach, but I didn’t follow up on it. I thought he was taking care of himself after he told me he would do better. “You can’t do that, and you know it.”
"I know.”
“I don’t think you do,” I interrupt him firmly. “You are studying Sports Medicine, Gabe. You know the effects not eating has on an athlete. It’s dangerous. Not only can you faint, but you put stress on your organs, and it slows down healing any bruises or other injuries. You need a minimum number of calories just to function, let alone build the muscle you need to power through games and withstand bodychecks and—"
“I know.” He takes my hand. I can see tears glistening in the corners of his eyes. “And I’m sorry, baby. I really am. I was just under a lot of stress, and I thought if I could just get through thisseason, I’d be fine. I didn’t want to let the guys down; I wanted to give them the best chance at making it pro. Especially since I decided I don’t want to go that route.”
“You don’t?” I look into his eyes. He swipes a thumb under one of mine and nods. He takes my other hand and moves closer to me. Our knees bump together with the way we’re sitting.
“I’ve been thinking about it since last year,” Gabe says. “I love hockey, I really do. But I’ve realized that the traveling and constant practices aren’t how I want to spend the rest of my life. I want to come home each night. Wherever home is.”
This time, I do move to crawl onto Gabe’s lap. I straddle his legs, and his hands cup my ass. My lips are on his before either of us can say another word. I missed him so much. I was so damn worried.
Our tongues dance together, like they’ve been practicing this dance forever. I run my hands through his hair, pulling the hair tie out in the process. I’m just as obsessed with his hair now as I was when we first got together. Obsessed with him. With all of him.
“You always have a home with us.” I whisper the words against his lips. “Now, take me to bed. Please.”
“It’s only noon, baby.” It’s noon on a Saturday, and Owen is actually with Brian and their family. Gabe’s parents made the drive when they heard the news as well. They’ve been staying with Mandy for the past two days. They were at the airport when Gabe landed.
“Then you better grab us two bottles of water, Daddy.” I give him a smirk and tug on a strand of hair. “Because I don’t have to pick Owen up until seven.”
***
The courthouse is very… brown. The seats are long rows of brown wood, with a maroon, almost brown cushion. The stand that the judge sits at is brown. The dress that Karen is wearing is even some shade between tan and brown. I don’t want to be judgmental, but it’s not a good color for her. I’m being petty, but I don’t care.
We’ve been going back and forth already for twenty minutes. I thought this was going to be a quick over and done with thing, but their lawyer is bringing up everything from my past. Not that there is anything that would even remotely affect Owen. I never brought exes or hookups to the apartments. I’ve never done drugs. The only time I drank alcohol was during nights out, when Owen was in the care of a trusted friend or adult. All of this is explained to the judge.
I hate that I have to justify my perfectly normal existence this way.
Then the moment that I’ve been dreading arrives when the judge asks Owen to come up and answer a few questions. Owen looks nervous, but I give him a hug when he passes by, and I tell him to just be honest with the judge and any question he’s asked. He nods.
To give credit to the judge, he lets Owen sit on his lap and smack the gavel a few times. I relax only when Owen starts giggling.
“Daddy! Look at me! I’m a judge!” He waves and I wave back, a smile spreading across my face.
“This is perfect,” my lawyer whispers next to me. I ignore it. It’s not like I’ve trained my kid to be so adorable: this is just who he is.
“Alright, Owen. I have just a few questions for you, okay?” Owen nods and glances at me once before looking up at the judge. “Can you point to your dad for me?”
Owen points at me and then turns back to the judge. It’s cute how excited he is now.
“And do you like living with your dad?” Owen nods again, a toothy grin splitting his face.
“Daddy’s the best. We have a big house and we play a lot and he lets me help pour the cereal in my bowl. He also bought a pool, but I gotta wear sun… sun…” He looks at me and tilts his head in the most adorable way. I can see the bailiff standing to the side trying to hide a smile. “Daddy, what’s that stuff called?”
I wait for the judge to nod before I answer him. Owen might be having fun without understanding how serious this is, but I know better. I can’t afford to get comfortable and then have the other shoe drop.
“Sunscreen,” I say simply.
