‘Nothing at all. And we don’t need booze to enjoy ourselves.’
‘Exactly. The company’s the main thing. So, my room after dinner?’
‘I’ll be there.’ June smiled.
When she left the nursing home, Claire didn’t feel like going home to read in the garden. She wanted to be with people, feeling an overwhelming need to laugh and chat and let off steam. Her brother Ronan lived nearby, so on an impulse she decided to drop in on him and Liz. They would probably be spending a day like this in the garden, and she envisaged them all sitting there, drinking cold white wine and chatting while the children ran around, periodically being dragged into games of hide-and-seek or chase. She hadn’t seen her nephews, Adam and Ben, in a while, and she loved spending time with them. Cheered by the image, she hopped into her car and drove the short distance to Ronan’s house.
There was no response at first when she rang the doorbell, and she assumed it was because they were in the garden. The car was in the drive, so she knew they were at home. She was just pulling her mobile from her bag to let them know she was outside, when she heard the thundering of feet in the hall, and six-year-old Adam flung open the door.
‘Claire!’ he exclaimed, a big grin lighting up his face. ‘Yay!’
‘Hi, Adam.’ She bent down to hug him. It had been agood idea to come, she thought. Adam’s welcome was just what she needed today.
‘Everyone’s in the garden,’ he said, running down the hallway ahead of her to the back of the house. ‘Claire’s here!’ he yelled, bursting outside through the kitchen door.
Claire’s blood froze as she followed him – because when Adam had said ‘everyone’ was there, he’d meant everyone. Everyone except her. Ronan, Neil, Liz and Michelle were sitting around the garden table with the remnants of what looked like a very boozy lunch, while their children played football together on the grass. It was very much the idyllic scene she had pictured in her head – but without her.
The children were happy to see her, Adam and Ben and their cousins Holly and Cian all rushing up to greet her enthusiastically and imploring her to join in their game, unaware of any undercurrent. But her brothers and their wives were awkward and embarrassed, and when she caught Michelle making a ‘yikes’ face at Liz, she just wanted to vaporise. Damn, she thought, trying not to cry, why had she come?
‘Claire!’ Liz said, recovering first. ‘This is a nice surprise. Sit and have a drink.’
‘No, I won’t stay,’ she said, struggling to keep her voice even. ‘I was just passing and I thought I’d pop in and say hi.’
‘Come on,’ Ronan said, standing and pulling out a chair for her. ‘Have a drink. Were you in with Mum?’
‘Yes.’ She walked slowly towards the table. If she ran off now, she would look pathetic. ‘I won’t have any wine, thanks,’ she said to Liz, who was passing her a glass. ‘I have the car.’
‘You could have a half-glass? Or a spritzer?’
‘I’ll just have some mineral water,’ she said, spotting a bottle.
Michelle poured her a glass and passed it to her.
‘Have you eaten?’ Liz asked, surveying the table. ‘There’s not much left but?—’
‘I’m fine, thanks. I’m not hungry.’ She buried her face in her glass, gulping water to stop herself crying. Her throat ached. Why couldn’t they have invited her? She could have done with this today. She felt so unwanted, like an outsider in her own family.
‘We decided to do this at the last minute,’ Liz said, as if sensing how she felt. ‘It was such a gorgeous day. You have to strike while the iron’s hot in this country, don’t you?’
‘We’d have asked you if we’d planned it,’ Ronan said.
‘It’s fine,’ she said, dredging up a smile. The last thing she wanted was to let them see how hurt she was. ‘I was kind of busy today anyway.’
‘Besides, she probably wouldn’t have wanted to come,’ Michelle said to Ronan, as if Claire wasn’t there. ‘I remember when I was single, the last thing I wanted to do was hang out with a bunch of couples.’
Jesus! Claire couldn’t believe she was playing the couples card. Was Michelle actually suggesting that she needed adateto spend time with her own family?
‘How is Espie?’ Michelle asked.
‘She’s fine – in great form.’ Claire wasn’t about to enlighten Michelle on her mother’s misdemeanors. They didn’t get on, and the whole incident would probably end up as an anecdote in Michelle’s column – spun so that it would read as yet one more example of what Michelle had to put up with as a long-suffering daughter-in-law.
‘God, I haven’t been in to see her at all yet,’ Neil said. ‘It’s so busy at work. I suppose we might as well wait until she’s home now,’ he said to Michelle.
‘Well, she’s there for two more weeks,’ Claire said.
‘I want to go and see Granny!’ Holly yelled, as she ran past, chasing a ball.
‘We’re going in tomorrow, aren’t we?’ Ronan consulted Liz, who nodded.
