“You’ve got this, girl,” Paige encourages me from her place in the wings. She’s here tonight, helping the three new girls adjust. She has spent the last three days running us through every possible scenario she could think of and explaining what our role is. In addition to dancing, we are required to work the floor and offer any interested parties a lap dance. With every change of song, he pays again if he wants us to keep going. Our goal is to keep him interested as long as possible. Then we move on to the next sucker until our shift is over. She said on a good night, I could leave with over a thousand in tips. That’s if I just want to dance. There are also the private suites in the back of the establishment; they are more pay-by-the-hour type arrangements and can be very lucrative indeed, starting at one thousand per hour depending on what the gentleman has in mind. Apparently, the men pay a shit ton every year to have the privilege of using those rooms and hold special elite cards that give them access. Maybe one day I will feel confident enough to give the suites a try, but for tonight, I’m happy just to focus on the dancing. Taking your clothes off is one thing, but actually having sex and doing all the things I ticked on the requirements list is another altogether.
I throw Paige a smile, trying to act more confident than I feel as I peer onto the stage. It’s all lit up, but the floor where all the men sitlooks dark, washed out almost.Thud, thud, thud, my heart beats in my ears. You can do this, Daisy, I assure myself on repeat, because I know I can, I have it in me.
I feel Paige’s hand softly land on my arm. “Are you okay? You look like you’re about to pass out.”
You can do this, Daisy don’t let Cruz’s words corrupt your brain. He’s biased because of his awful life experience, it won’t be yours. Even though I know that’s the truth, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about what he said. He doesn’t think I can do this. Or should. I have never let another person’s opinion of me affect me so much before. Why do I care what he thinks? I have known him for just a few days. But I do. After our altercation on Wednesday, things have been tense between us. Every time I passed him in the kitchen, there was this look on his face that made my stomach sink. Like I was breaking his heart. Honestly, I have felt guilty ever since, but I have to do this for myself. This is what I want, and I don’t want to die one day wishing I had pushed myself out of my comfort zone and lived the life I wanted. I want to be able to say I did it all.
I suck in a deep breath. Play a character, Daisy, be someone else just for the night and see if you can do this. You’ve come this far. I give Paige a nod and widen my smile, ready.
The music changes, and I know it’s my cue to take the stage. The DJ calls my name. “Please welcome one of our gorgeous new girls, Princess, to the stage.” And it’s as if I’m having an out-of-body experience. My legs are moving, but I no longer have control over my body.
Becky passes me on her way off the stage and gives me a high five. “Knock em dead, girl,” she calls. She’s hyped up from the adrenaline of performing. I understand that high, I used to be the same every time I took the stage for my ballet recitals, but this isn’t a ballet recital.
As soon as I take the stage, my mind goes blank; all the overthinking I have been doing for the last few days vanishes. I have no idea if I’m doing the dance the way Paige taught me or if I’m in time with the music, I just listen to the beat and move. And the strangest thing happens—I feel alive, like really alive for the first time in years. I can sense all eyes on me, but I can’t see them properly because of the blaring stage lights, and that helps. Asher was also right, my disguise makes me feel invincible, like another person altogether, and like this, I can let go of all my inhibitions, finding a part of my raw sexuality I never knew existed. Each layer of my outfit melts away as I move. Men in suits lean forward, tucking bills into what’s left of my glittering golden lingerie; others throw bills on the stage. My time vanishes, and before I know it, my three songs are over and it’s time for me to head backstage.
Paige is the first person I find when I come off the stage. She offers a hug, throwing her arms around me. “You looked incredible out there. Stunningly beautiful and in control of the room. You’re a natural.”
“Thank you.” I beam back at her, excitement vibrating through me. “I didn’t know it could feel so…”
“Liberating?” She smirks back at me like she gets it.
“Yeah.”
“You found your calling. Not every girl feels alive out there, but some, some shine. Go fix yourself up and get out on the floor. Now’s the time to make some money. I’ll come find you later and see how you’re going.”
I move back through the hall to our dressing room, stash the cash I took on stage in my locker, and change quickly into another one of my sexy little outfits. Checking my reflection in the mirror, my hair is still perfectly in place, and my make-up fared well considering howmuch it felt like I was sweating. I look so different it’s hard for me to even recognize myself, and I love it. I feel powerful and in control of my life for the first time in so long. I blow myself a kiss and then close my locker. Time to make some real cash.
I turn to leave and find Asher leaning against the doorway, patiently waiting. “Hi,” I say awkwardly. I’m not sure why, if it’s because I know he was watching me up there on stage or if it’s just the way he’s looking at me with a hunger that needs to be quenched immediately. It’s dangerous.
He fans his face dramatically, and I can’t help but laugh. “You’re going to be a busy girl tonight, little princess.”
“Better get out there then.” I go to pass him, not wanting to get caught up in his irresistible vortex. I can already feel myself smiling all silly at him.
He has other ideas and takes my hand on my way past, stopping me. “Promise me you will be careful. I know this is a bit of fun for cash, but don’t trust anyone, okay?” he says more seriously, and I feel the weight of his words. He knows this world better than anyone and normally comes across so carefree about it all, but maybe that’s a front. Maybe he’s more affected by what happened to his mother than he lets on, and he’s just better at hiding it than Cruz.
I blink back at him, his words causing worry to seep in. “I thought you said it was safe with all the bouncers around.”
He squeezes my hand. “You are, you just can’t be too careful.” The way he says it like he has seen shit go down makes me nervous all over again. Does he have the same fears as Cruz after what happened to their mother? He releases my hand, his fingers trailing up my arm and into my new wig playfully. “You’re sexy as a redhead.” He grins at me, and I can see he’s trying to lighten the tense mood he just created.
“Thanks.” I stare into his eyes for way longer than I should because I get lost, trapped in everything Asher. And for a second, I wonder if kissing Asher would be anything like kissing Cruz was, nothing short of earth-shattering. My heart skips a beat. This is dangerous, Daisy, walk the hell away right now.
I take a quick step away from him, trying not to stumble in my extra-tall heels. “Adoring fans waiting, catch you later.” I smirk back over my shoulder at him as I walk away, probably swaying my hips a little more than I should be with his eyes on me. But screw it all. Tonight, I feel like a vixen, and I’m going to use my newfound confidence to my advantage and make some cash of my own.
He winks at me. “Save a lap dance for me,” he calls, all charming and cheeky, his damn sexy dimples showing.
“As long as you have a pocket full of cash. You only get one freebie.” I can’t help but laugh as I saunter away. I don’t know why, Asher is just one of those charming kind of guys you just can’t help but adore. He’s playful and fun and my guess is the life of the party, and I know it’s silly, but I want to get swept up in his energy.
Unfortunately for me, the room down here is more intimidating than the stage. The crystal chandeliers cast a low light across the patrons, all expensive suit-wearing businessmen. All intimidating. I lean into the wall for a second watching the other girls work. They saunter around the room in their six-inch heels and playful outfits, looking like they are made of gold. Luckily for me, when I go to push off the wall, I don’t have to go searching for some poor sucker to make my first buck off of. He’s already standing before me, smiling, all charming and relaxed with one hand in the pocket of his gray suit. In an older, confident, rich-businessman kind of way, he’s kind of sexy. He shows me a handful of bills. “Hey, gorgeous. Why don’t you come make my night better?” He holds his hand out for me to take.
I smile back at him flirtatiously, trying to play the part. I’m so damn grateful I don’t have to go searching for my first ever lap-dance victim.
My heart nearly stops when I find Cruz watching me over the man’s shoulder. His eyes narrow, his arms crossed angrily across his broad chest. Damn, what is he doing here? I don’t know how to do this with him watching me. I feel flushed and kind of sick suddenly. Maybe that’s what he wants, to put me off, and I know I can’t let him. I inhale deeply and take the man’s tie, running it through my fingers playfully. “Lead the way, handsome.”
With a cheeky grin, he hands me the wad of cash he was holding, and I slip it inside my bra for safekeeping.
I’m not even sure how I make my legs walk across the room. All my attention is on the cranky biker glaring at me as we stroll by. He shakes his head, disappointed in me, making me just as mad at him as he is with me. Was he here watching while I danced? And why does a small part of me hope he was? I flick him a bitchy grin that tells him to fuck off then disappear into the private booth with the gentleman, my heart hammering suddenly, and it’s got nothing to do with the lap dance I’m about to give.
The man slides into the leather booth across from me, his adoring eyes fixed on mine the whole time. “I have never seen anyone move like you do, Princess,” he says, all smooth like butter, and I can tell he’s the kind of man who is used to getting what he wants with just a few words.
