Nathan wasn’t the type of guy you could take home, fuck, and walk away from the next day. He was the dating kind. And I wasn’t about to lead him on to think it would be me sitting across from him at brunch on Sunday morning.
We stood watching the scene in front of us, and as I scanned the room, I caught a guy checking us out. Or checking Nathan out, to be exact. He was a little older, late thirties, dressed well in a suit, and alone.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
“I’ll be right back. Gotta use the bathroom.”
Nathan nodded, but from his sad expression, he must’ve thought I was ditching him. And maybe I was, but for a good reason. I set my bottle on the bar and weaved my way through the crowd until I came to the man in the suit, whose gaze remained fixed on Nathan.
“He’s free, and I suggest you make your move before someone else does.”
Startled light eyes met mine. “What?” But he peered over my shoulder. “I don’t—”
“Yes, you do. Trust me, he’s a nice guy.”
He touched his tie, his eyes narrowing with suspicion. “Yeah? So why aren’t you with him?”
Fair enough. “Because I’m hung up on someone else.”
His mouth drooped. “I-I lost my partner two years ago, and this is my first time out.”
“Don’t hurt him,” I warned. I might not have my own life sorted out, but here I was playing matchmaker for two strangers.
“I wouldn’t.”
“He’s the real thing.” I nudged his shoulder as I passed him. “Don’t be like me.”
I did use the restroom and by the time I returned, Nathan and the stranger were in conversation, smiling and laughing. I watched them for a moment, and when I saw them take out their phones, obviously exchanging numbers, I laughed to myself.
My work is done.
On the way out, I paused by Nathan. His new friend had gone to the bar. “Good luck.” I winked.
“Oh, hi.” He blinked and pushed his glasses up. “Thanks for…well. You know.” And then he blushed. Nathan really was a sweet guy.
“Have a great rest of the night.”
But Nathan wasn’t finished. “You know, sometimes you think things are impossible, but they’re not. I came tonight only to get my friends off my back, and now I met Blair and you. Maybe try again with that guy?”
I gave his shoulder a squeeze. “Yeah, sure.”
My walk home took me across several avenue blocks, past strolling happy couples and groups of friends. As a lonely teen pretending to be someone he wasn’t just to fit in, I was present but never seen, unwilling to open myself to the possibility that I’d be laughed at or, even worse, ostracized. I chose to hide for the sake of popularity and having friends. Rory told me to be proud of who I was and never conceal my light.
And when he died, he’d taken that brightness with him, and I’d yet to find my way out of the darkness. Coming out to Dev hadn’t erased the pain of my loss—nothing could.
**
By the next morning, my mood hadn’t shifted. Dev was my cheerleader, and sometimes you needed to listen to someone list your positives instead of taking the negative punches on the chin, over and over. I hadn’t had much time to speak to him since I began my new job, as he and Brody had been out of town, covering games on the West Coast. After the shocking kiss with Patrick and the talk with Nathan, I was contemplating doing the impossible, but I needed to talk it out before I took the step.
Dev’s calendar—which I continued to monitor in case he needed me for something—indicated he didn’t have anything on his schedule, so I texted him to see if he and Brody wanted to have lunch. Patrick was at training camp. He was starting the following Sunday and would be leaving on a two-week road trip. I had a mountain of things to do, but I needed my friend to give me advice.
Dev called me instead of texting back. “How’s the job going? It’s working out, isn’t it?” he asked with a hopeful yet cautious note in his voice.
“Yeah, it’s good. I’m glad to say you were right and I was wrong. Patrick is a professional, and I’m busy from morning to night.”
“I knew it. You were being a pain in the ass about it.”
“Okay, no need to sound so smug. So? Are you and Brody up for lunch?”
