“Yeah. She tried to hide it, but she began selling things to pay for the drugs—our VCR, camera, any jewelry she wore. Occasionally I’d come home from school to find strange guys in the house. She claimed they were repairmen or deliverymen.”
“But you have your doubts.”
He hated admitting it because it gave credence to what his father and uncle thought, but it would be foolish to think otherwise.
“I don’t know what to think; it could be possible. By the end, she wasn’t my mother anymore, just a shell of the woman I knew. It made me even more angry that my father had walked out without even trying. He accused her of sleeping with other men, but he was the one who deserted us, knowing she was addicted and I was the only one there with her. He left her to fail. They called her the weak one because of her addiction, but it’s a weak person who walks away when things get tough.”
André held him, and Chess finally released all the anger and hurt he’d held inside all these years.
“When I found out they weren’t married and that he might not be my father, in a way I was almost happy because I didn’t want to be like him. I was glad not to have his genes. I blame him for her spiraling out of control. If he’d stayed and helped her like he should’ve, given her the strength she didn’t have on her own, maybe she would’ve made it. Instead, he took the coward’s way out and ran away. He knew she had no one, so in essence, he left her to die. And in turn, left me in the water to drown.”
André held him tight. “I’m never going to walk away from you. I won’t let you sink.”
“I know.” He rolled to face André. “And even though I’ve already said it, I need to reiterate: I’m sorry I lied to you. All along I was hiding something so important, yet I was so angry at you for those pictures.”
“Which you had every right to be. I failed you too. I do wish you’d told me, but I understand why you didn’t.”
He gazed into André’s face, so dear to him and as familiar as his own reflection, and though it pained him to say it, there was nothing else he could do. “Do you? I wish I did. I feel I let you down twofold—first by not trusting you with my past, then by doubting your love because of those pictures.”
André’s mouth thinned, and his eyes grew stormy. “I know now that it had to be Kyle behind them. There’s no one else it could be. I want to find out who sent them.”
“How?”
“I don’t know,” André said with resignation. “I don’t do business the dirty way, but sometimes you have to get into the trenches and sling some mud to get results.”
A wave of longing hit him to be held by André after all the revelations. “Speaking of mud…” He slung his leg over André’s waist, rubbing his rapidly hardening cock with André’s. “I’d like to get dirty with you. Right now.”
André caught his mouth in a hard kiss, and Chess opened up to the insistent push of his tongue. During the past few months, there had been times when he’d despaired of ever getting to this point again—of feeling the smoothness of André’s muscles shifting under his grasp, or the press of his rough, hairy thighs—and to feel him springing to fullness almost brought Chess to tears.
“I’ll never keep anything from you again. I promise.” He sucked on André’s tongue, loving the vibration of his moan against his lips.
“I love you. No matter what it is, we’ll do it together. Side by side.” Tension sizzled between them, and André nipped along his jaw, then licked a hot, wet path down his throat. “Just give yourself to me. All of you. No holding back. Not anymore.”
Chess writhed beneath him as André flicked his nipples and gently bit them, sending a blaze of electricity surging through him, and he held on to André. “Never leave me. Never.”
It was a miracle to have found this, Chess thought hazily as André continued to kiss and lick him all over, stoking his fire until he threatened to burn to ashes. The one person who brought him to greater heights each time they touched, yet never let him crash to earth. Chess meant every word he’d said at dinner: He’d love André if he had no money, if he had nothing at all, because what he had—something no one could take away from him, something he could never lose—was a beautiful heart. A heart Chess vowed to treasure.
“Why would I leave the best part of me?” André grabbed the lube from the nightstand, slicked his fingers, and gently eased them inside Chess. It had taken Chess years to forget the skin-crawling touches of the men he’d given himself to. His greatest fear the first time he and André had made love was that he’d feel nothing at all.
Chess couldn’t stop shivering—not only from the vulnerability of being naked with André, but from the desire blazing from his face. It was no secret how much André wanted him, but would he be like the others who, once they got what they wanted, walked away? It was why he hadn’t had sex in years, his senses dulled from pain and monotony. André had given him hope, for the first time ever, that love could exist.
André held him firm and kissed him and Chess knew right then he’d never be the same.
“You feel it, don’t you?” André’s fingers sank inside him while his mouth wreaked havoc over the rest of his body, leaving licks of fire wherever it touched him. “We’re meant for each other. You fit me.” He eased inside Chess. “I belong in you.”
And now, just like that day, André took him into his mouth, sucking gently on the crown, tongue circling the sensitive underside before sliding to the root. Chess moaned, torn apart by the storm inside him. The head of his cock grazed the roof of André’s mouth, and when André hummed, the vibration sent shockwaves through Chess. His hips surged upward.
“Oh God, oh God.” His climax rushed through him, and he gave in to the throbs of pleasure beating him up from the inside out. Worn out and sated, still on his postorgasmic high, he sighed when André sank inside him. “You make me feel drunk.”
André’s wicked smile broadened, and he increased the pace of his thrusts. “Making love to you is a natural high. I don’t need anything else.”
Chess reveled in that thickness sliding in and out of him, splitting him apart with each heavy push. He tightened around the rock-hard shaft, wanting to keep every pulsing inch inside him. André growled and snapped his hips, taking Chess to dizzying heights.
Layer upon layer fell away from Chess, and finally he felt free to be who he’d always wanted but thought he had to hide. Himself. With no secrets between them any longer, and secure in André’s love, he let go.
“I love you.” He wrapped his legs around André, wanting him closer. Two bodies, one heart. One love.
The hot rush of André’s release filled him, and they held on to each other, letting the coolness of the air conditioning dry the sweat from their quivering bodies. André’s heart pounded, and Chess held him close until its tempo settled.
