* * *
All my fears and Nate’s concerns were for nothing because Allie and the kids, Alyssa and Chase, made me feel like part of the family. The kids had decided to go ice-skating because they were underage and couldn’t come out for drinks, so we met at the café at Rockefeller Center, where, though it was crowded with tourists, we managed to get a table after a fifteen-minute wait to have hot chocolate. Alyssa had an interest in art deco and was excited to hear I had many pieces of jewelry and glassware from that period, while Chase, a dead ringer for Ethan and Nate, wanted to be a journalist and loved writing.
“You have an original first edition of Upton Sinclair’sThe Jungle?” Upton Sinclair was an early twentieth-century author famous for exposing the plight of workers in the meat-packing industry, and I coveted the rare first editions of his works. Chase went on, “That’s so cool. I’d love to see it.” Bright-eyed, he drank his hot chocolate, impatiently brushing back the thick swath of golden-brown hair falling into his eyes. This was what Nate had looked like when he was young. My heart warmed.
“Yep. A first edition and it’s signed. Come by anytime and check it out. The other books too.”
Ethan groaned. “And there goes my bank account.”
“Oh, suck it up, big brother. Besides”—Nate’s eyes sparkled with mischievous light—“wait until Allie gets a load of all the estate jewelry Press has.”
Ethan glared at Nate, then with a shrug, huffed out a laugh. “I guess it could be worse. You could be dating a real-estate broker who’d try to get me to buy an apartment for each kid.”
I grimaced. “Ugh. Don’t remind me. I’m getting ready to look for a place, and I’m dreading it.”
“Where do you want to move?” Allie finished her hot chocolate and pushed the cup away.
“Probably the Upper West Side. I love the old pre-war buildings.”
“They are beautiful. So much detail and those gorgeous floors and high ceilings. I have lots of friends who live up there, so if I hear something, I’ll let you know.”
“Thanks.”
We left the café and separated, the kids taking a car to go downtown to Penn Station to take the LIRR back home, while we walked over to 30 Rockefeller Center and took the elevator up to The Rainbow Room. It was a chilly evening, slightly windy but clear, and the moon hung in the sky like a silver pearl surrounded by midnight-blue velvet. Nate handed me a drink and lifted his in a toast.
“A celebration. To new beginnings.”
Allie and Ethan’s eyes fixed on Nate, their expressions registering both surprise and happiness. I raised my glass and said nothing. Being with Nate was like a thrill ride of ups and downs, and I was only beginning to learn the swings of his moods and desires. I personally didn’t think he’d yet come to terms with what his father did to his family, and he’d never elaborated on why he’d broken up with his boyfriend. A tiny stab of jealousy pricked me. Nate had nothing but praise for him. I wanted to know more.
And then there was my deceit, which weighed on me, heavy as a bad meal. I’d made a huge mistake all those years ago with Jared, and now my older and wiser self regretted it. But like everything else in life, there was no changing the past. I could only learn from the mistakes I’d made and vow not to repeat them.
I sipped my drink, and Nate came over to me and draped his arm over my shoulder. “Everything okay?”
I blinked. “Yeah, sure. Why?” I plastered a big smile on my face and took a gulp of my champagne.
“You had a funny look on your face for a moment.”
“Nope. I’m good. And I really like your family.”
“Good.” He leaned over and kissed me softly. “I know they really like you too.”
“See? All that worrying for nothing.”
“I’m going to hit the restroom. Be right back.” I watched him saunter away.
I could get very used to him…
Allie rested a hand on my arm. “I’m so glad Nate brought you to meet us tonight. He tried to hide his feelings, but I know my brother-in-law, and he’s been so angry and in such denial these past years.”
“It’s hard for him to talk about his feelings.”
“Has he said anything in the group you go to?” Ethan set his untouched drink down. “I’m so hopeful it’ll help him.”
“I think it has. He’s a little less angry with your father over what happened.”
Ethan and Allie exchanged a look, and Allie tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Nate told you? About how Whit died?”
“Yeah. And with whom. I can understand why he was devastated.” The true depth of how Nate’s father’s affair had scarred the family went well beyond the simple gossip Frisco had alluded to when I’d first started seeing Nate.
