“How about you?” Frankie’s eyes gleamed. “You ain’t gonna tell us he don’t mean nothin’ to you, are you?”
“Uh…” The heat of embarrassment crept up my face.
“Nice one, Frankie.” Austin shoved him in the shoulder. “We said we weren’t going to embarrass him.”
“Oh, so you two are talking about me, huh?” I rubbed the back of my neck and watched a woman enter the store. Hopefully she’d need my help and I could get away from these two.
“Well, I mean…” Austin raked his hand through his hair, more uncertain than I recalled seeing him in a while. “Comeon. You meet this homeless guy, and the next thing we know, you’ve gotten him a job at Man Up, he’s living in your apartment, and now he’s working with you here. And let’s not even mention how you look at him.”
“How?” I blurted out, wishing I could kick myself and take it back.
“Like you know the answer to a secret.”
I shot Austin a sharp glance, and he gave me a tiny nod. I knew he’d understand.
“I do care about him. He’s like no one I’ve ever met. There’s somethin’ about him.…I dunno.”
“You don’t owe us an explanation. We ain’t the ones you should be tellin’ this to anyway.” No longer laughing, Frankie slung an arm around my shoulder. “But if you’re thinkin’ it, tell him. I got a feelin’ it’s been a long time since he had anyone care about him.”
“Father Frankie, huh?” I ruffled his hair. “Thanks for the advice. Now, why don’t y’all come and say hi to Harlan?”
Together we approached the checkout where a woman was in discussion with Harlan, and I noticed he didn’t look right. He was smiling, but his eyes were all shiny and his face was pale.
“Everything okay?” I left Frankie and Austin and circled round the desk to stand beside Harlan. “Maybe I can help?”
“No,” the woman stated firmly. “I meant to speak to him.” She pointed at Harlan while addressing me. “I was in the secretarial pool at his law firm, and when I walked in here I thought I recognized him.” She directed her attention back to Harlan. “Do you remember me? You used to come by and tell me and my friend to stop speaking Spanish to each other. That we were in America now.” Her smile stretched out smug across her lips. “We got a nice settlement from the firm. Enough for me to send my son to private school and start a college fund for him.”
“I’m sorry. I want to apologize for how I behaved to you.”
“It don’t matter. I don’t believe in fake-ass apologies to make yourself feel better. My mother used to say, ‘Don’t go by what they say. Look at what they do.’ So what’re you doing to make things better? Volunteering? Helping at a homeless shelter? You hurt a lot of people.”
“I know. The best I can tell you is that I haven’t forgotten and I think every day about all the hurt and pain I caused people.”
“I hated coming to work because of you. I’m all right now because I left that place for another firm, but no one should have to put up with people like you.”
“I know. I agree. I’m so sorry,” he whispered. “I know I keep repeating myself, but I am.”
The agonized expression on his face cut straight to my heart, but I knew this was part of Harlan’s healing process. Hearing his explanation of his cruelty to people was very different than seeing the effect it had on the people he hurt.
“We all heard how your family kicked you out. How does it feel, being on the other side? Not so special now, are you? Nice that you got a second chance, but how about all the people you hurt who never will?” Without waiting for Harlan’s response, she took her bag and walked out of the store.
“I’ll be right back.” Harlan fled to the back where the stockroom was located, and because customers were waiting, I couldn’t leave the register to make sure he was okay. The guys and I exchanged glances.
“Jesus, what the hell was that about?” Frankie slid his arm around Aaron, who’d come to put the magazine back on the sale rack and stayed when he heard the discussion. “I thought Harlan was gonna puke.”
He might be in the bathroom.“Not sure, but I gather she used to work with Harlan. And it’s not my story to tell. I wanna check on him, but I can’t leave the desk.”
“Go ahead, man. I can cover you. We use the same register you got here at my store. I just gotta scan the bar code, right?” Aaron peered around the front of the desk.
“Yeah.” Relief poured through me. “I owe you big-time.”
He waved me off, and I ran to the back, checking the bathroom first. When I discovered that empty, I entered the small stockroom down the hallway.
“Harlan?”
I didn’t get an answer but heard heavy breathing. My heart banged painfully as I turned the corner and saw him huddled against the back wall, his arms wrapped around his knees, staring into space.
“Hey, it’s me.”
