“Then don’t ask,” I shot back. “They’re married. I saw their rings. They didn’t do anything out of the ordinary of straight couples. Why does it bother you what they do at home?”
Frowning, Lennie picked up his coffee. Finished with her typing, Marie swung her chair around to listen.
“I don’t like thinking about some guys wanting to suck my dick.”
“Ew, Lennie, don’t be gross.” Marie snickered.
Fuck.I really liked this job and didn’t want to give it up.
“Did one of them hit on you? Say they wanted to have sex with you? I didn’t hear that. I mean, look at it this way. Do you look at every girl and want to bang her? No. Do you think every girl wants you? Doubt it. Not everyone you meet wants what’s in your pants, gay or straight.”
That seemed to shut him up, and we finished our coffee in silence. The whole conversation set me on edge for the rest of the afternoon, and after we closed up, when Lennie asked me if I wanted to come hang out again with his buddies, I turned him down.
“I can’t. I got plans. Some other time?”
“Yeah, sure.” A muscle ticked in his jaw. “You’re pissed. Is it that gay thing?”
Desire to come clean warred with practicality. I still didn’t know Lennie well, and after our conversation this afternoon, I didn’t exactly feel safe. Something told me to wait before opening my mouth.
“Nah.” I gave him what I hoped was a winning smile. “Seriously. I got plans with my boys from the neighborhood. Definitely hit me up again, a’right?”
Without waiting for an answer, I gave him a wave, opened my car door, and shut it right behind me. The tires spun, spitting up gravel as I gunned the engine and took off. Driving through city streets, my mind wandered from those two guys, living their happily ever after in their new house, to me and Frankie trying to work it out, with his parents and friends against us. An iron knot tightened in my stomach.
“How’d you get that scar?”
The screech of brakes and blare of horns snapped me out of it. “Fuck.” I’d gone through a red light. I quickly looked to see if any cops were around. My heart banged so hard, I grew light-headed. I had to pay attention, and for the next few blocks I shut my mind down to anything but traffic. As I sat waiting at a red light, a winking bar sign across the street caught my eye. I desperately wanted a beer. Cool, smooth, with a slight after-bite.Damn.Nothing used to taste as good as a cold one after a long day at work.
But, knowing how I got when I used to drink—nasty, rude, and dismissive of Frankie—I vowed when I came out of prison to never drink again, and for the months I’d been out, I’d kept my promise.
“No.” I banged the steering wheel. “Keep your fucking head on straight. Eye on the prize.” The light changed to green, and with the utmost care, making sure to stay at or right below the speed limit, I made it home without further incident.
Frankie wasn’t home as once again he, Austin, and Cort, their other dancer friend, were eating dinner in the city. They’d made a pact to get together every week so they didn’t lose touch. It made sense that since he was dancing tonight, he’d hang out in the city with them. Never having made close friends myself, I hated to admit I was a little jealous of their circle.
After I took a shower and had a sandwich, I lay down on the sofa and stretched out. Almost a year in prison would make anyone relish their privacy, and when I was inside, all I wanted was this—to lie around, watch what I wanted on television, and do what I chose instead of what I was told to do. There was something to be said for not having eyes on you twenty-four seven. And yet…restless for some reason, I turned on my side. I missed Frankie. From the moment I saw him four years ago dancing by himself to the music in his headphones while folding his clothes at the laundromat, I couldn’t get him out of my mind.
“It’s like you cast a spell on me or something.”
“Ha-ha, I’ve been called a princess before but never a witch.”
We’d been dating two weeks before we had sex, and I finally confessed how tangled up he made me feel.
“How about I call you mine?” I held my breath, watching his eyes widen in surprise.
“What do you mean?”
Late afternoon sunlight spilled across our sweat-soaked, naked bodies. Earlier in the day we’d gone for a walk on the beach, then had pizza at Spumoni Gardens. Sleepy from the heat and food, we agreed to go back to Frankie’s and take a nap. When we awoke, Frankie lay curled in my arms.
“Please,” I whispered, kissing Frankie’s long lashes, moving down to his full lips. “I want you so bad. I need you.”
“You do?”
I nodded. “Look.” I took his hand and put it on my erection. “Fuck. All you gotta do is touch me, and I’m ready. Only you.”
His grip on me tightened. “Only me. If we’re gonna be together, it’s gotta be exclusive.”
“Oh yeah.” I groaned when he began to stroke me. “Only you.” I wiggled out of my shorts, and he went down on me.
From that day forward, he became like a fever in my blood, and I couldn’t let him go. Frankie became a part of me.
