Here, he’d done the same and been tossed out with yesterday’s trash. A trembling began deep inside him, and he bit his cheek to prevent the threatening tears. Better get to work and empty out his desk. He’d been there long enough to know it was no joke; when five o’clock rolled around, a security guard would appear at his door to escort him out.
For a moment he thought about calling Jeremy, wanting to be comforted. Needing him. Those big, strong arms would feel so damn good around him right about now, but he couldn’t tell him, at least not yet. Jeremy was so driven, so successful himself, he’d never want to be saddled with a loser who’d been fired. Besides, so many mornings he woke up early and stared at a still-sleeping Jeremy, wondering what a man like him—buff, beautiful, and with tons of friends—saw in a boring guy like him. The less reason to give him, the better.
It had been over ten years since he’d had to look for a job, and Blake didn’t have any idea where to begin. He’d heard people talking about Monster and Glassdoor, but he hadn’t updated his résumé in years. There’d been no need to. For a brief moment he put his head down, giving in to the overwhelming sense of despair.
A knock sounded at the door, and it opened partway.
“Blake? Everything okay?”
Cassandra stuck her head inside, and he jerked to an upright position. The last thing he needed was for anyone to see him sitting in his office, crying his eyes out.
“Uh, yeah. Come on in.”
She slipped into the office and closed the door behind her. From the start, Cassandra had the uncanny ability to sense his moods.
“You know, right?” He rubbed the heel of his hand in his eye. “It’s okay, don’t pretend. I can tell by your face.”
“Yes. I do. I’m so sorry.” The lilt of her soft Jamaican accent, usually teasing him about his candy habit, was nowhere to be found. Instead, her warm eyes regarded him somberly. “They’re such shits.”
That, at least, made him smile. “Really? You shock me.”
“Forget that.” She slid into the chair across from him and crossed her legs at the ankles, elegant and refined. “What happened?”
As he relayed the discussion he had with Scott, he watched fire kindle in her eyes, and he had to chuckle. “Don’t lose your job defending me. They aren’t worth it.”
“I know that, but what are you going to do?”
“Start looking for another job.” Sounding braver than he felt, Blake opened his top desk drawer and began removing the few personal items he kept in the office. “I’m sure one of the Big 4 will have an opening.” He closed that drawer and looked into the second. Nothing. Considering he’d spent ten years at this job, shouldn’t he have accumulated more stuff? Aside from a picture of him, his sister, brother-in-law, and nephew, Blake kept nothing personal in the office. He picked up the picture and slid it inside his open briefcase.
“It’s tough out there. Are they going to give you a reference?” She worried her lip between her teeth.
“I assume so. I don’t know. I didn’t think to ask.” He latched his gaze to hers. “Do you think they won’t?”
“No, of course not.” Her attempt to soothe him didn’t work, and Blake began to sweat. What if they wouldn’t give him a reference? It would be impossible for him to find a job at the same pay without it.
His phone lit up and began to ring. “I’ll get that and tell people you’re not available the rest of the day.” She stood by the door, her willowy body drooping against the frame. “I’m really sorry, Blake.”
“I know.” More than ever, he wished he was still in bed with Jeremy. “It’ll be okay.”
Once Cassandra left, his smile fled, and he cradled his head in his hands. The bravado he showed to her was nothing more than a sham. It wouldn’t be so easy for him to find another job that paid his current salary in this economy. Nausea threatened. He was fucking scared. His legs had been knocked out from under him, and he didn’t know what to do.
A text popped up on his phone.
Missed waking up with you this morning.
He trailed a finger lightly over the screen. God, he loved Jeremy. He had no idea how it had happened, but he’d fallen in love with someone who couldn’t have been more different than him. The man had a way of making him feel as if he was the most important person in the world. It was his personality, and everyone Jeremy met came away completely charmed and under his spell, yet Blake still felt special. When Jeremy held him, the world melted away, and Blake swore he could feel the man’s lips on his skin long after they’d separated.
Me too. So busy here.The lie came so easily, it frightened him.
Wanna have dinner with me at the gym?
Sure. 6?
A surprised emoji face popped up.
Thought you’d be working late.
Shit.He’d have to remember he’d made a big deal over how busy tax season was.
