“I didn’t, but you’re gonna tell me anyway.”
“You think you’re better off staying at home, doing nothing and jerking off in the shower?”
“You’re disgusting.” Sam sipped his cooling coffee. Thank fuck the waiter was there to pour him more to put an end to this conversation. He’d studiously ignored the corner where Zach’s three friends sat.
“I speak the truth. You haven’t gotten any in months, now you meet a guy you seem to hit it off with. Are you gonna pull the trigger and try and see if there’s something between you two, or make do with dirty fantasies in the shower? I always thought that was a waste of a hard-on if there was someone willing to take care of my needs, you know?”
“Sometimes there’s more to it than sex; you’re married, you should know that.” How the hell did he get dragged into a personal Dr. Phil show at eleven in the morning?
“You’ve already taken care of the sex part and seem to hit it off there.”
Sam’s eyes narrowed. “That’s never been an issue. Sex is easy to come by. Trust, not so much.”
“Heather says—”
“I love your wife, but she has no idea about my life, or what I’m looking for or want.”
“Do you?”
Refusing to rise and take Henry’s bait, Sam scowled, then jumped when his phone pinged and vibrated. “Jesus, does it have to sound like it’s coming every time I get email?” With some trepidation, Sam picked the phone up and held it in the palm of his hand, staring at the screen.
“You’re such a technology maven.”
“Every time I get a message, the phone has a damn orgasm.”
“Even your phone has a better time than you.”
The waiter cleared their plates, and he asked for the check, tucking his phone back in his pocket without checking the message. It was probably from the life coach he’d actually seen a few times. She’d sent him exercises to do and lists of books to read. None of which he’d bothered with. Instead, he spent his time wandering his neighborhood, looking at all the happy couples, wondering how they knew the secret of keeping a relationship alive.
Though he wouldn’t dare admit it to Henry, he’d even looked—not registered for but looked—at a few dating websites, reading profiles that all sounded the same.
I like exotic vacations, going out to dinner, and long walks on the beach at night.
His mind wandered back to the night with Zach on the beach—the soft warmth of his mouth and the hot clench of his ass. Damn, he wished he’d never met Zach Cohen.
I need to move on, Sam thought grimly. Though forgetting Zach was proving harder than Sam had imagined.
He scrubbed his face with his hands, blinking hard when to his shock, there he was in the flesh. Son of a bitch, Henry was right; Zach Cohen had shown up for breakfast with his friends. A very good friend from the protective way the man held him around his shoulders and the kiss Zach placed on the man’s cheek. Anger warred with disappointment in Sam’s chest, squeezing his heart.
“Fuck, that’s him, huh?”
“Yeah.” It was the only word he could spit out; his jaw muscles ached from grinding his teeth together. Even from across the restaurant Sam could see the deep connection between Zach and the other man. The kiss Zach gave him on the cheek was more than simple affection. It didn’t matter—Sam had no desire to see any more; it was like a train wreck occurring before your eyes. You didn’t want to see the crash, but you couldn’t help but watch.
“Are you gonna go over there and say something?”
He never had the chance to answer Henry because at that moment, Zach met his eyes, and the shock on his face told Sam he’d never expected to see Sam again.
Anger surged inside him. Why the hell should he be the one to feel awkward—he wasn’t the one who cheated on his boyfriend, then ran away into the night from the overwhelming guilt. Funny how Sam would’ve laid bets that Zach wasn’t that type, but he supposed after being cheated on for years, his vision of what made a real relationship might be somewhat skewed.
“Yeah.” Surprising himself, Sam rose out of his seat. “I think I’ll go over and say hi to the happy couple.”
“Sam.” Henry’s uncharacteristically somber tone drew Sam’s attention.
“What?” He rocked on his heels, anxious to confront Zach. From the corner of his eye Sam could see Zach hadn’t stopped staring at him, even though the boyfriend’s arm remained around his shoulders.
“Don’t make a scene. He doesn’t owe you anything, and it’s up to him to tell his story not you.”
It wasn’t anger so much as embarrassment. He’d opened himself up and once again to the wrong man. The thoughts played around in his head like an out of sync carousel as he walked toward Zach’s table. Alarm flared in those blue eyes, and for a moment Sam felt sorry for Zach, and remembered his odd reactions when Sam held him down in bed and grabbed him by the shoulder on the boardwalk.
