Icy-pale blue eyes, like those of a Siberian husky, rose from their study of the floor to meet Luke’s. Empty, sad, and bloodshot, the devastation in them hit Luke like a slap to the face. He couldn’t imagine what it would be like to love someone so intensely.
“Yes, he was, and I don’t know why you thought it necessary to threaten me. Who the fuck are you to write me a letter like that?” The handsome face twisted in a sneer.
So much for sympathy. “I’ve tried to contact you for months, and you’ve ignored me. Anyone would think the same thing I did. You weren’t interested in the position.”
“Bullshit.” Peterson’s pale skin flushed red with his obvious outrage. “I was mourning my fiancé’s death, goddamn you. Can you understand? Haven’t you ever lost someone who meant everything to you so that nothing else mattered?”
Heat rose in Luke’s face as his heart slammed hard against his chest. Fuck, yes, he had. Not a lover, never a lover. But God, Brandon.Where the hell did you run to?His eyes widened with surprise as Peterson advanced on him. The distraught man stood so close, the heat of his breath touched Luke’s cheeks.
And then he smelled it. The scent was faint, but he’d know it anywhere. “You’ve been drinking, haven’t you? “
A slight hitch in the other man’s breath. “You don’t know what the hell you’re talking about.”
Luke’s laugh was anything but pleasant. “I grew up with a drunk. I know what I smell. It’s only eleven in the morning, and you’ve already been drinking enough that I can tell.” Then it hit him. “Are you operating today? Christ, you’d better not be going to the hospital like this.”
At least Peterson had the grace to look ashamed. “I only had rounds today, early this morning. No surgery or office hours.”
Luke released a relieved breath. “Thank God for that at least.” His eyes narrowed. “Maybe you really shouldn’t be involved with the project. I’m sure Keith wouldn’t want—”
“Don’t you dare think to lecture me on what he would’ve wanted. You’re a fucking nobody in our lives. I lived with him. We were going to be married. You barely knew him.” Peterson’s voice rose with each word spoken until he was yelling in Luke’s face. His door opened, and Valerie, as well as Dave, an analyst whose office was next door, stood there. Luke waved them back, never taking his eyes from the man in front of him.
“Look, Peterson. Why don’t you go home and sleep it off?”
“Go home?” Peterson’s laugh rang bitter and hollow. “It’s no home any longer. The walls are closing in around me. Everywhere I am, I see him there or hear his voice.” Peterson gripped his arm, and it surprised Luke to feel the power in his grasp. “I think I might be going crazy.”
The frisson of excitement that traveled through Luke at Peterson’s touch shocked him.
He blinked and shook his head, forcing himself to listen to the man, as close to a total breakdown as he’d ever seen anyone have before.
“I have to do this. To prove to him that I was worthy of his love. Don’t remove me from the last thing he ever asked from me.” Peterson’s long fingers curled around Luke’s bicep, digging in through Luke’s shirtsleeves. “I can’t bear the thought that I’m disappointing him.”
Shit. Was he actually feeling sympathy for this guy? Here he was all prepared to hate Peterson, and yet something deep within him, frozen solid for years, shifted and cracked, setting his equilibrium spinning out of control. Luke needed to put some distance between himself and this troubled man whose mere presence sent such confusing signals to both his mind and body.
He wrenched away from the hand on his arm, waiting until his own breathing slowed and his heart settled back to its normal rhythm. “Then don’t behave like an asshole. If you’re going to take on this responsibility, get your shit together. We’ll be working closely, and I won’t stand working with someone who’s loaded all the time.” He folded his arms, again in control.
Peterson had dropped into a chair in front of his desk, pale and defeated looking. “I never had more than one or two drinks before—before it happened. I can do it.”
Luke could see the effort it took for him to admit his failing. “You’ll have to.”
“I said I would.” Anger flashed across Peterson’s face, a hint of the initial arrogance creeping back into his voice. Those pale blue eyes flicked over him, cool and dismissive. The son of a bitch dared to pass judgment on him?
“I know what you say.” Luke sat and leaned back in his chair. “Make sure you do it.” The look of outrage on Peterson’s face was priceless. “Now let me explain what we are dealing with here.”
He handed over the thick bound book of the business plan and began to outline the details of everything they’d done so far to set up the after-school programs and the trips to the prisons. After approximately an hour passed, he sat back in his chair and tossed his pen aside. “I think we can stop there. You have a basic understanding of what we’ve accomplished and still need to do.”
Peterson nodded. “I do. How involved are we planning on getting with the teenagers and young kids in the shelter system? They need protection and have easy access to illegal guns, as well as being prey to them.” His lips tightened. “I want as many guns off the street as we can get.”
“As do we all, Peterson.”
“I think by now you can call me Jordan.” The tight lips softened to a tired smile. “You’re Lucas, correct?”
Shit. Another shiver slithered down his spine at the sound of his name on Jordan’s lips. Maybe he was coming down with something.
“Yeah.” He cleared his throat. “Well, um, I’ve got another appointment, so…” His voice trailed off, the lame excuse floating in the air as he failed to meet Jordan’s eyes.
“No problem.” Jordan stood and shook his hand. “We’ll talk soon.” He turned and walked out the door. The faint scent of his cologne lingered after he left.
For the rest of the day, whether in meetings, on phone conferences with major clients, or on the cab ride home, Luke’s thoughts strayed to Dr. Jordan Peterson. The elegant, cultured voice, piercing blue eyes, and firm mouth had Luke’s cock hardening to uncomfortable proportions in his trousers. Inexplicably, that Taylor Swift song played round and round in Luke’s head.
