During daylight hours the bar looked completely different than in the evening party atmosphere. Several other people had the same idea as they did, occupying two of the booths along the side wall, with drinks and lunch plates in front of them, while the bar hosted several older men, their attention captivated by an afternoon ball game on the overhead television.
The bartender came to take their orders. “I’ve seen you in here before, haven’t I?” He stared hard at Carter for a moment before recognition dawned on his face. “Oh, right, you were with Reed. He’ll be in shortly.”
A warning alarm buzzed inside Carter; the last thing he needed was for Reed to think he was forming an attachment to him by dropping by during the week. That wasn’t part of their arrangement. “You must have me mistaken. We’d like to order please; we’re in a bit of a time crunch.”
They placed their drink orders, and the bartender walked away, glancing over his shoulder with a frown. Carter didn’t miss the dubious look he received but ignored it and turned back to his clients, giving them a half smile and an indifferent shrug.
“I have that kind of face people think they recognize, but they’re usually wrong. Now let me outline what I have planned for ‘Chop to It.’” He kept talking, taking out from his soft leather briefcase the pad he’d brought with him to finalize their agreements. Using that and the charts he had previously downloaded from his computer to his phone, Carter smoothly outlined his plans to make their custom salad and fresh juice restaurant the next New York sensation.
The drink Carter ordered sat in front of him, remaining largely untouched as his enthusiasm for the project grew, and to his surprise almost an hour had passed by the time they finished ironing out the fine details and agreements. He took a sip of the now watery vodka and grimaced. A fresh drink appeared on the table in front of him. Grateful to the bartender, he glanced up from his notepad to thank him, only to be shocked by the sight of Reed standing in front of him. The memory of their last weekend together sent a surge of lust through Carter, disturbing in its intensity. He shifted in his seat, uncomfortably hard.
“Hi,” said Reed, a hesitant smile curving his lips.
“I’m sorry, we’re busy here.”
Carter’s shoulders tensed, and he sat stony-faced. He knew it was a mistake to come here; he needed to shut this down immediately before Reed got the wrong idea and assumed Carter was here to see him. “I’ll let you know if we need anything else.”
An embarrassed flush stained Reed’s face, and his fingers clenched spasmodically at his side.
“I—You don’t—” Reed stuttered, then swallowed, and as his Adam’s apple bobbed up and down Carter had a crazy desire to lick Reed’s throat and taste that all-warm skin. Instead he kept a tight rein on his emotions even as he watched Reed struggle with his own. Like that night in the club, Carter’s protective instinct flared, and he wanted to reach out and comfort Reed, but chose the coward’s way out and let Reed flounder, hating himself for not helping and for being the cause of the problem in the first place. Carter’s heart hurt almost as much watching Reed struggle as it did when he watched Jacks.
“Sure, whatever.” Reed spun around and hurried back behind the bar. From beneath half-lowered lids, Carter watched the older man pat Reed on the back and Reed jerk away from his touch with an irritated wave of his hand. A moment of shame swept through Carter when Reed, obviously still upset at the slight, closed his eyes and stood still, then, heaving a great sigh, began polishing a huge stack of glasses sitting on the bar. Carter turned back to pay attention to his clients with a practiced, smooth smile, although on the inside he felt like the shit he was.
“I think that about wraps up what we wanted to accomplish. I’m thrilled you want to work with me, and I look forward to helping you take New York City by storm.”
His phone buzzed, and it was a message that the driver had arrived back outside to take Dan and Carole to the airport. Since they wanted a chance to pick up some souvenirs before their flight, they planned to head directly to the airport. He walked them out to the car and shook their hands in farewell. Dan held the door for Carole, then climbed in and leaned out the window to speak to him one final time.
“Send me the contract today. I’ll sign it when I get home tonight, and we’ll be up and running.”
“Excellent. You’ll be hearing from me before five o’clock.”
Carter watched them drive away, then pumped his fist in the air.
He hurried back inside, and to his surprise the large stack of glasses in front of Reed had vanished, and Reed stood furiously polishing the bar even though to Carter’s eye it gleamed spotless. Unaccustomed shame washed over Carter at Reed’s obvious state of distress. He looked distraught, pale, and nothing like the confident man who’d held him down in bed and made him scream his name in passion.
Before he could stop himself, Carter strode through the bar and took hold of Reed’s wrist, dirty washcloth and all. No surprise, however, when Reed yanked away from Carter’s grasp and turned away, his body stiff with tension.
Carter had no choice but to speak to Reed’s back. “I’m sorry, but it was a business meeting, and I don’t mix business with pleasure.” Even as he spoke the words, Carter heard how weak an excuse it sounded.
Vibrating tight with anger, Reed threw the washcloth on the floor and faced him.
“It wasn’t that. I don’t… You…” Reed’s chest heaved, and he looked as if he was holding on to the edge of his rapidly deteriorating self-control.
Without thinking Carter went into protective mode; his only thought now was to calm Reed down from his overwrought state.
“Shh. It’s okay. Take deep breaths and relax.” Like he did when Jacks had bad moments, Carter kept his voice soft and soothing, hoping to temper Reed’s anxiety, and after a few moments it worked; Reed’s breathing steadied, and he was able to draw a deep breath and speak again.
“I don’t like this, this,”—he waved his hand in the air, his lips thin with anger—“whatever you call what we have going on between us. I understand your need for holding your professional life separate from your private life. I get that.”
“Then what’s the problem?” Carter genuinely didn’t understand.
“It was the way you dismissed me, like I wasn’t worth the time you took to speak to me. It brought me back to our first night together when you thanked me for sleeping with you, like I was the hired help. I’m a person, Carter, with feelings. We may only be hooking up, but that doesn’t mean you get to ignore me in public. Or think it’s crazy for me to text or call you sometimes. There’s no reason to be ashamed of me, yet you are. I’m a human being with real feelings, not someone you simply fuck once a month and forget.”
Standing at the bar listening to Reed unburden himself, Carter understood the damage he caused by his selfishness, but he didn’t have the ability to change course. “Will you sit down with me? I have a meeting to get back to at the office, but maybe we can talk before I leave.”
For a moment Carter thought Reed might refuse. The sharp line of his jaw remained tense with anger, and a muscle ticked in the smooth skin.
“Please?”
