He wished this conversation had never happened and hoped it had come to an end, but he should’ve known better. Only once before could he remember seeing his grandmother so angry, when at the trial for his parents’ case against the trucking company, the defense attorney had alluded that maybe his father had been drinking himself. It was a sight to remember, but she’d gathered her shattered emotions and instead, at trial, made an impassioned victims’ speech to the judge and jury that left everyone in the court in tears.
Now, here in her kitchen, was the second time. “You should be ashamed of yourself, Drew. I’m ashamed for you and surprised. You are basing your beliefs on what others have told you.”
Knowing it wasn’t possible for him to tell his grandmother of Ash’s sexual escapades, he still stuck to his opinion of the man. “Look, I know you have a soft spot for him, and I like him well enough, but he’s a loner, Nana. Yes, he’s charming and handsome, but he isn’t someone you can get through to.” Even as he spoke the words, sadness filled his heart. He’d thought Ash could, somehow, meld into his family dynamic as another friend. Sure, the strange sexual attraction he’d felt around him was disconcerting, but he could’ve dealt with it until he started dating again.
”Believe me, no one likes to be alone. That boy needs people around him. Trust me, I know. He is crying out for help, and I’m afraid if one of us doesn’t take him in hand, something terrible might happen to him.” The worry in her eyes unnerved him, as she was never one for histrionics. Rachel must have finally caught the ball as her shrieking and Mike and Jordan’s teasing from outside had stopped.
“Did he talk to you?” For Ash to confide in his grandmother would be nothing less than shocking.
“No, not much. He locked himself up as tight as a clam and refused to say a word. But I see beneath the smile that never reaches his eyes.” With a fierceness he didn’t know she possessed, Nana grabbed his arm. “I’m worried after our talk he might do something bad to himself. You think I’m too old that I don’t understand the ways of the world. I know he’s a homosexual, gay. Why should that matter to me? But something’s not right with him. He was very depressed. Promise me after dinner you’ll go check on him. For me?”
Although there was nothing less he’d rather do than play babysitter to Asher Davis, he agreed, because he’d do anything for his grandmother. All throughout dinner, he allowed everyone to think his silence was still the result of his surprise over Rachel and Mike’s relationship. The pleasant dinnertime chatter washed over him, and he made sure to nod at all the right times to keep them from thinking he wasn’t paying attention to what they were saying.
In truth, he could only think about Ash.
Chapter Ten
It was the usual bitch of traffic up the F.D.R. Drive to Ash’s apartment on the Upper East Side, but it gave Drew time to think. He’d already made peace with his sister and Mike and let them know he was happy for them. Someone ought to be happy in his family, and since his life was nothing more than work and coming home to collapse in front of a ball game on TV, he wished Rachel the happiness she deserved.
With the radio playing classic rock, and no end to the headlights in front of him in the foreseeable future, he allowed his mind to drift to Ash. It was obvious that whatever Ash and his grandmother had spoken about affected him in a way Drew had never seen before. From the brief time they’d spent together, Drew had learned that sharing emotions and personal entanglements wasn’t part of Ash’s makeup. Drew remembered that Peter, who was supposed to be Ash’s best friend, knew only slightly more about the man than Drew did after a mere three months.
Finally he got off at the exit nearest to Seventy-Second Street and made the turn up Park Avenue. Ash’s apartment was located on Eighty-Sixth Street and Park Avenue, and thankfully there was a parking garage down the street. He told the valet he’d be several hours and handed him the keys in exchange for his ticket. It came as a shock that Ash lived in one of the premier addresses in the city. How the hell did he afford a place like this? These old, prewar apartments ran in the millions of dollars.
An elaborately uniformed doorman greeted him at the front of the apartment building, and Drew entered the beautiful formal lobby. There was a vast expanse of inlaid marble both on the floor and in the high soaring columns. Various sofas and delicate gilt chairs were grouped around an indoor arrangement of plants and flowers. A magnificent crystal chandelier hung over the concierge desk, with smaller, yet still elegant lighting fixtures leading down the hallway to where Drew presumed the elevators were located. His entire apartment could fit into this lobby.
While he and Rachel had received payment from his parents’ life insurance policies as well as a large, multimillion-dollar settlement from the trucking company, Drew had invested most of his capital and lived frugally. He didn’t need a lot and preferred to spend his money on supporting his favorite charities. This type of luxury was beyond his comprehension, yet somehow, it didn’t surprise him to find Ash living here. The man was an enigma and had been since the day they’d met. The fact that he’d been a scholarship student and now lived in a multimillion-dollar neighborhood only added to his mystique.
Drew approached the concierge desk—a beautiful slab of granite surrounded by gleaming mahogany. The young man, in a dark uniform with more discreet gold braiding than the doorman, looked up with a practiced smile. “Good evening, sir. How may I help you?”
Funny, though he might be a successful doctor, he felt underdressed and woefully out of place. “Uh, I’m here to see a Mr. Davis?” Somehow he hoped he had the wrong address, and he’d find out Ash really lived in a small, cramped apartment like himself.
“Yes, sir. Whom may I say is calling?” The young man had the house phone in his hand, an expectant look on his face.
“Um. Tell him it’s Drew.”
Although it was late, after eleven o’clock, people still came and went with regularity through the gilded front doors. The men and women passing by him dressed for the evening in clothing that screamed luxury. Their jewelry winked glints of diamonds and who knew what other treasures. Drew didn’t know much about high fashion, but living with Jackie for the short time they were married had opened his eyes to how expensive a woman’s wardrobe was to put together. With a rueful look, he glanced down at his sneakers, faded jeans, and T-shirt. Perhaps he went too far on the other extreme, but he valued comfort over trend. Maybe Ash dressed so formally to keep up the image he felt he needed to project living here. He’d never seen the man in anything other than a long-sleeve button-down shirt and dress pants, never jeans.
His fashion contemplation was cut short by the young man at the desk. “You can go up, sir. The elevators are down the hallway to your left. Mr. Davis is in apartment 19C.”
After thanking the man, Drew followed his reflection along the mirrored walls of the hallway. What stared back at him was somewhat disconcerting. He laughed to himself as two women sidled away from him when he stepped inside the elevator, choosing instead to stand by the elevator operator. He wanted to take out his business card and say,See, look. I’m really a doctor. Don’t worry.
They reached the nineteenth floor without incident, and after thanking the young man operating the elevator, he exited onto a hushed hallway. The walls were papered in ivory, and the floors were a dark high-gloss wood. Each door had a lighted button next to it, and the apartment letters were in gold on the door itself.
Feeling somewhat nervous, he pushed the button and heard the soft chime ring within the apartment. After a moment, the door swung open, Ash’s unsmiling face greeting him. The apartment loomed as a dark void behind him.
“Uh, hey, Ash. Sorry if I woke you—”
“You didn’t.”
The heated intensity in Ash’s crystal-like eyes unnerved Drew. He so did not want to do this, but he’d promised his grandmother, and he’d never broken a promise to her, so…
“Can I come in? It won’t take long. I promise.”
Without speaking, Ash stepped back and opened the door wide. Drew entered the darkened apartment and gaped. Ash had lit candles, placing them on various tables through the apartment, but that didn’t hide the grandeur of the overall space. The entranceway was wide, with hallways that branched off to other unknown parts of the apartment. Directly in front of him, a large picture window showcased the glittering lights of the city at night. The living room, from what he could make out in the dim candlelight, was large and airy, with an ornate mantel over a fireplace.
“Christ, Ash, this place is amazing.” He glanced over at Ash, who hadn’t said a single word.
“It was Mr. Frank’s. He left it to me in his will.”
