The thought seemed to perplex him. His entire face shut down, except for his eyes and thick eyebrows. His eyes were alert, his brows drawn down, and it was like he was trying to figure out a mathematical problem that had no answer, but he was determined to find one. I exploded with laughter, laughing until I had to run to the bathroom to keep from having an accident, and when I started to run back to the bed, he was waiting for me at the bathroom door.
He stared at my face. “You are so beautiful,mywife.” And he leaned down and kissed me between the eyebrows.
I smiled. “So does that mean no cops will be involved if I steal your sperm?”
He grinned at me and did things to me that night that almost made me late for work the next day, but I wanted to keep ahead of schedule like we had been. And even though that night was nice, lighter than it had been between us in what felt like a long time, the days seemed to be growing heavier for Matteo. He started drinking more. Became quieter and more reflective. His thoughts more dangerous. More toxic to his well-being.
If the entire situation had him in its iron grasp, that article had stuck poisonous claws in him.
He woke up much earlier than me to go for runs or lift weights or anything that would cause him physical exertion, and he would exercise for hours and hours. He would come to bed much later than me, drunk on whatever his drink of choice was for the night. So I was relieved when we took the week of Mama and Niccolo’s wedding to take a trip to Lucca. It wouldn’t put Noemi behind schedule because we were so ahead of schedule.
We were surrounded by family, and all the things Scarlett and Mia had helped me plan for mama were so nice. We threw her a bridal shower and even had a girl’s night, while the men celebrated with Niccolo. That night didn’t end well, though, because Matteo had gotten into it with a cousin. Vincenzo’s son. Vincenzo was a high ranking…I wasn’t sure what he did, but I knew he wasn’t a soldier.
The wedding was beautiful, though, and held at the church on the property. It was surrounded by white and pink magnolias in bloom. I cried the entire time. Hormones and the deep sense of happiness that my mama was happy and going to be taken care of made me emotional.
So was my worry for my husband, but I tried to separate the happiness I felt from the worry I felt. I wanted to keep the baby in the light, even if my heart was overshadowed by dark shadows.
While we were in Lucca, Matteo spoke to Nonno about what he planned to do—relinquish his right. I wasn’t there for the conversation, but I knew Nonno’s face became tighter after, and he was more reflective and withdrawn from conversations. Like he was always deep in thought. Matteo reminded me of Luca when he did that. But I wasn’t sure if it was official yet. A lot was going on with Rocco, and I had a feeling that the family, our branch of it, was in danger of losing the kingdom to another branch if any of those sniffing lions got wind of the weakened leg.
And by the end of the spring, it didn’t seem like it was healing.
I, however, was in full bloom. We had two months until the baby was born. And after filming wrapped, the ladies in the family threw me a fabulous baby shower. Mama was looking so much better, her sickness in remission, again, and her hair was growing back! The doctor couldn’t make any promises about whether it would ever return, but he had high hopes for her. Especially since her diet was much better—Niccolo made sure of it—and I thought her spirit was better too.
Though, when she’d look at me sometimes, I found in her eyes the same sense of worry my husband had. It was in those times that I felt a stare, and when I found it, it was hers, and she wasn’t hiding her feelings. She seemed more understanding of Matteo, and his love for me had finally made her fall in love with him. Every so often, she would squeeze his hand or touch his shoulder, like they were both going through the same thing when it came to me. It was like they both were suffering in silence, even though Matteo couldn’t hide it from me, and were waiting for the day when I wouldn’t be pregnant anymore.
I didn’t have that much longer to go, but the baby still needed to cook.
Except.
As Matteo and I were finishing up his room (I was convinced our baby was a boy), I started to have bad pains in my lower back. Bad enough that I had to stop and sit down. Take a few breaths. Try again after the pain resided. But it would come back even stronger, like I’d been kicked in the back by a horse or something.
“Baby,” Matteo said, his wild eyes on my face.
I closed my eyes for a second, lifting my hand, breathing through it. “I don’t think this is normal, Teo.”
“Me fucking either.” He picked me up right as the pain hit, and I screamed out. His eyes grew even wilder and he set me down. As the contraction passed, and I gave him a nod of approval, he picked me up again, hauling ass to get to the car. After a phone call, he sped so fast to the hospital, I couldn’t have remembered it if I tried. The entire world was a blur of speed, sweat, tears, and pain.
By the time we made it to the hospital, it seemed like a team was waiting for us. No doubt hired by the Fausti family to welcome one of their own into the world with nothing but the best. Not long after we arrived, so did our family. The waiting room was packed.
I was in labor.
Full-on labor.
And almost ready to push.
Except, baby boy’s heart rate wasn’t cooperating.
The doctor looked at Matteo and said, “She will need to have emergency surgery.”
Everything happened so quickly after that, it reminded me of the drive to the hospital. So much rushing, it was making life a blur around me. But my husband’s hand in mine was keeping me rooted, keeping me settled and calm, and he kept saying beautiful things to me, some in Italian and some in English, and when the doctors took me to the room where I’d havethe surgery, they had to put me fully under because I wasn’t responding to the epidural quickly enough.
The baby’s heartrate was declining rapidly.
The last thing I remembered seeing was my husband’s eyes staring into mine before the world went dark.
Chapter 51
Matteo
