I wiggled my hand free, and the only reasons he let me was that I was bleeding, and he probably didn’t want to hurt me, and even if I tried to run, where was I going to go? He ruled my world.
“You don’t get to make this decision alone.” My voice was shaky, and I realized I had my hands up, taking slow steps back.
He was following me, step for step. “Sì.I do. You are mine.”
“Snap out of it, Nazzareno!” I snapped my finger at him. “Where did you go? Have you lost your fucking mind?”
He said something in Italian, and then said, “Worse. My heart.”
I stopped when we were in the middle of a dining room. He stopped.
“Okay, okay, okay. Listen. Just hear me out.” I went to pinch the bridge of my nose and stopped myself. “How is this going to help? Marrying me would be a huge mistake…for your health.”
“I do not care about my body.” He shrugged, and I could see how the shirt stretched with his hulking form. He touched his heart, staining the spot over it with blood. “This is all that matters. If I die, I will die a married man—to you. You will wear all black in honor of me while in mourning, and I will have the honor of dying for you.”
“No. No. No! Don’t say that.”
“We are already killing each other. I will lay down my weapon and so will you, and then we will surrender to each other. At least in this, I have made my choice and will stand my ground. At least in this, it will not be my love who tries to take my life, but a battle over it.”
“We can—we can do this another way. You can still marry what’s her name, and…what if I marry Renato? Just for show!” I fucking rushed the words out, because I knew they were the wrong thing to say once they were out.
If Nazzareno could have turned green, it would have been a warning, but the only thing I got was a shot of adrenaline.
He started to advance on me, but his steps were measured, controlled, and that made me want to take flight even more than when he was destroying things. It was such a calculated control…it sent a chill into the room.
I tried to copy his movements, but my feet were not as coordinated as his. Especially because my knees were knocking together. He caught me by the arm a few seconds before I fell, and he pressed me up against the wall, pinning me there. His hand came underneath my jaw, holding it in place, and I could feel his warm blood on my skin. I smelled it like I had sniffed a wet penny.
“Do you want him, my wife?”
My wife.
I whimpered—because if I didn’t know it before, those two words sealed his fate. “No,” I breathed out. “I don’t want anything to happen to you.”
“It is happening to me, by your refusal.”
“You’re not thinking about this!”
He released me, going for my hand to bring me back into the room with his brother, cousin, and clergyman, but I moved too fast. I went to run, but he was only a breath behind me, his arm snaking around my waist and carrying me.
“Put me down!”
He said something to the men in Italian.
I looked at the clergyman. “Don’t do this! I don’t consent! Do you understand me? I DO NOT CONSENT TO THIS!” I waved toward me and Nazzareno.
The clergyman opened and closed his hands, like he didn’t understand.
I doubted it, but I had a feeling the man was terrified for his life. Sweat poured down his face and he kept removing his glasses, wiping his eyes. His knuckles had turned white from squeezing the Bible in his hand.
“If I CONSENT TO THIS, NAZZARENO FAUSTI, YOU ARE MAKING ME CONSENT TO YOUR DEATH! I COULDN’T LIVE WITH THAT!”
He set me down and turned me to face him. “I cannot live withoutyou.” His eyes softened, giving me a glimpse into his soul. It was open and vulnerable, showing me something he never showed the world, and I whimpered, my hand shaking as I reached out and went to touch his face.
My hand was like a whisper against his skin. “You’re not. I’m here.”
He closed his eyes. “If I go through with the arrangement, I will lose you. It is too much to bear, for both of us. The longer we are together, the deeper I will love you,uccellino selvatico. I cannot bear the loss. I would rather die.” When he opened his eyes, he was closed off and had locked me out. He snapped something at his brother, and his brother nudged the clergyman.
The man stood straighter, bringing his Bible away from his chest.
