“How do you know?” I whispered.
He looked down at me and traced the shape of my lips with a fingertip. “It’s what I’d do. It’s what I did.”
“Oh.” I blinked up at him. “Our first time.”
“Yeah.” He leaned down and gave me a soft kiss. “The first time I ever felt the inside of a woman. The consuming heat. Total entrapment. No space existing between us. The first time I ever made love, and truly felt it—as deep as the marrow in my bones. Even deeper. The ember still burns. It only grew on our wedding night. The thought of mine is all I ever need to keep it burning.”
The undying ember. His poem.
He spoke for the both of us. We had become more rooted together, but at the same time, we were still sensitive to each other. As sensitive as the first time we touched.
I had to resist the urge to put my trembling fingers to my mouth to calm the crave he’d stirred inside of me, to cool the searing heat he had left behind.
Not one to dally, he urged me along, not giving me the chance to linger, pushing the stroller toward the car.
“Time to go, Ballerina Girl. It’s getting cold out. Our nights are about to get a lot longer.”
And he thought he couldn’t sing? Not all words had to be set to a tune to reach the heart; not all words had to be spoken to be heard; just as no touch offered could still be felt.
12
Scarlett
No matter how hard I wanted to be captured, sleep couldn’t catch me.
The day had run me ragged, and my mind hadn’t received the memo that it was over yet, so everything but my physical body continued to sprint.
I rested in bed, my body turned toward my two true loves, but my head was wide awake, and my emotions sparked like two live plugs, jolting my anxiety.
Brando slept in his sweatpants, no shirt on, with Mia on his chest, one of her perfect hands resting on his lips. He protectively encased her in one of his arms. The other hand was wedged between my thighs.
He had fallen asleep singing—ironic?—Christmas tunes to Mia, while she fell asleep listening and humming along.
Not able to help myself, I reached out a hand and ran my fingers through her hair, and then his.
“My beast sleeps,” I said in Italian.Sleep was a foe that my beast had a hard time slaying.
Strokes melted into caresses, and I traced their lines, comparing, so alike but with differences. I recognized my influence too, as well as a combination of Brando’s family and mine.
Luca had been right; Mia had something of his mother, Grazia Angeli.
“Enormous potential” was how all the magazines had described her back in the day when she was an actress. Before she had met her full prime, though, she had met and married Marzio Fausti. Children had followed, and she had followed her husband into his life of power, a certain infamous fame attached to that title. She died not long after Niccolo was born.
Checking to make sure that both my loves were breathing nice and easy, I closed my eyes, trying for sleep again, but I only heard the echoes of quiet cries coming from Eunice’s room.
The entire day replayed over and over without rest. It was a wakeful nightmare, running through the labyrinth with me, at every turn a new and disturbing scene, so lost without any sense of direction.
Some people panic in the moment. I preferred to shove it into a box, then have it pop out at me much later.
If I didn’t move soon, I’d wake my husband, and the night before hadn’t been kind. I didn’t think the meeting with his father had been his idea of a perfect day either. Though we stood in Luca’s house, ate at his table, conversed with the man, Brando never wanted me—us—this close to him.
Removing his hand from my thigh, hoping I wouldn’t disturb his sleep, I kissed his wedding ring and then placed the hand over Mia’s back. He didn’t stir, neither did she, but Ruby did. Her ears perked as my feet touched the chilled terracotta.
She rested her head next to my leg, staring up at me with beautiful, almond-shaped eyes that were as dark as her coat. I patted her head, smoothing down her ears, scratching behind them.
Tea?I asked myself.No, too much work.
An entire carton of gelato?I touched the floor again.Too effing cold and really no appetite.
