The sex would be decent. I could use her body for the needs of mine. We could eat at the diner on occasion. Enjoy some music at the bar on the weekends. And I’d spend hell right next to Mitch every two weeks.
Scarlett had told me that we made sense. Jane had told me that we made sense.
Nothing about this woman made sense to me. Even knowing all that I did, I still rejected what I didn’t know. She’d never be any more than Janet/Jane, a woman who couldn’t inspire an ounce of fire inside of me. Decent was not good enough. I didn’t belong to her. She couldn’t have someone who already belonged to someone else.
That would make her a thief. No one stole from the people I loved. If they attempted it, I wouldn’t hesitate to cut their hand off. Janet/Jane was a woman; the most I could give her was no. Which under the circumstances, made me think it was the equivalent for her.
It would be a relationship of convenience. I rejected that as much as I rejected the idea of never seeing Scarlett again. As much of a chaotic and dangerous ride it was with my Ballerina Girl, never knowing from one minute to the next whether I’d be in heaven or hell, her life called to mine, she was my life, and I had no choice but to follow.
A man will follow his heart no matter the cost. If he had to be coerced into it, his heart wasn’t in it to begin with.
“Janet—”
“Jane,” she corrected.
I nodded. “Jane, you need to go.”
“I don’t care if you love her!” she blurted. “I know you do. But it doesn’t matter. You can love me. In time, I’m sure you can. Not like you love her, but you can love me too. Or like me.”
“No.” I shook my head. “That’s not good enough.”
She didn’t look convinced. If anything, the fire in her eyes had started to blaze with the prospect that we could fight this out.
“I love you, Brando. That’s enough. I’ve loved you for years. You didn’t even try to kiss me back. How can you be so sure if you refuse to even try?”
I looked over my shoulder. Penny waited, the door open to Mitch’s truck. She listened in, her eyes narrowed, sharp as knives.
“Go,” I said, turning back to Jane. “There’s nothing for you here.”
Tears slipped down her cheeks, and finally, she nodded and ran for the truck.
* * *
Maggie Beautiful made me pause when I went for the door. I had forgotten that she had arrived in the middle of the chaos, and now she waited for me, a look on her face that told me whatever she came for was not going to be pleasant. She had a beer in her hand. Another sign that she wasn’t dealing with whatever it was with a sober mind.
“This day cannot get much worse. Hit me.”
“Oh—” she tapped her front tooth “—I’d say it could. Maybe you should have rolled around in the mud a bit more. Acting like asuino!” She slapped the back of my head in a gesture unlike her. It was probably the most motherly thing she ever did. “Here—” She thrust the letter she had with her at me.
“Tell me.” I lifted it up.
“Just read it.”
Devouring the words, my eyes raced across the page, the script familiar. A pang of longing punched me square in the chest. I pushed against the pain with a hand.
“She’s marrying theratto.”
“No—”
“She married theratto.”
“What if she did?”
I looked up at her. “The world won’t sleep tonight. You’ll be visiting me in prison. I’ll share a cell with Luca.”
She tapped her tooth harder, more anxious now.
“No! Are you not reading? I can do that for you now. If you want.”
