Specifically,mybedroom.
“I’ve shot men for less,” I said, slipping my Glock back into the concealed holster on the side of my bed.
“Sorry!” Martin called over his shoulder, clearly never intending to look at us again in his lifetime. “I was looking for Noreen, you see, and…” He scuttled sideways, like a crab, heading for the door.
“Noreen escaped her pen?” Fee groaned, “Again? I’m getting mighty tired of cleaning up goat shit.” She seemed less alarmed at her father’s surprise visit than he and I had.
“Yes, well. She’s not here, so-” There was a crash and a scream downstairs and he bolted out the door.
“I almost wish that would be an enemy invasion, rather than that miserable beast set loose on my house again,” I groaned.
Fee frowned at me. “Does that happen often?”
“Rarely, kill the first twenty or thirty fools who thought they could take me, and everyone else seemed to learn the lesson.” I stood up, pulling on my jeans. If, on the off chance, it was an enemy invasion and not Noreen, I’d rather face it with my pants on. Of course, given what that cursed goat has already gnawed to pieces in my house, my crotch being safely covered was still a prudent decision.
“It is unjust that you can be so fucking hot,” Fee said peevishly. She’d settled up against my headboard, the sheet slipping down to display one perfect breast.
I looked down at my bare chest and unbuttoned jeans. “I need to shower and get into a suit. Would you care to join me, or should we chase down your father’s pet first?”
She pursed her lips. “I was thinking more of round three in that waste of water you call a shower, but if Noreen gets into your lovely study with all those first editions...”
Damn the woman! Was I really hovering between fucking her up against my heated Egyptian tile under the rainwater showerhead or chasing down that animal? I should have known her love for books would win out over lust as she scrambled out of bed, hauling on her clothes with a level of grace and efficiency I admired.
Downstairs was pandemonium.
This time, Magda was atop the dining room table as Martin chased Noreen in circles around it. The goat held a chunk of something in those big blocky teeth that I recognized as what was left of my favorite cashmere overcoat.
“Just a minute,” Martin gasped, “I’ve almost got her-”
“You fucking beast! Get over here!” Fee shouted.
GODDAMNIT NOREEN! I WILL TURN YOU INTO STEW IF YOU DO NOT STOPNOW!”
My voice echoed through the room as Noreen abruptly sat on her bony goat ass, and Martin plopped down into a chair, too, eyes wide behind his spectacles. Stalking over to her, I pulled the cashmere, covered in goat spit from her mouth.
“You are an evil little shit,” I snarled, shaking it at her. “If Martin didn’t like you so much, I’d feed you to the guard dogs.”
“He doesn’t mean that, Da,” Fee hastily stepped in as his pleasant face blanched white.
“Don’t test me,” I said sourly, helping my housekeeper off the table.
Whipping my belt off, I gave it a snap, ignoring Martin and Magda’s yelp as I fastened it around Noreen’s neck. I also noticed that while Fee didn’t jump, her pupils flared and she took a deep breath.
Hmm… something to keep in mind for later.
“This belt is one I found in Naples, hand-made by an ancient tailor on the Isle of Capri,” I told Martin, handing him the end to hold as a leash. “I would like it back.”
“Ah, certainly. Of course.”
He speed-walked the goat out, passing Charles as my PA burst into the room, carrying a pile of folders.
“I should probably ask if everything is all right,” he said, looking over the top of his paperwork, “but I don’t dare be distracted right now. Can we speak?”
“Of course,” I rubbed the back of my neck. “Fee, excuse us. Magda, would you bring coffee to my study, please.”
My luscious bed partner gave me a side-eye as she headed off after her father.
Safely ensconced in the study, I rubbed my eyes with the heel of my hand. “I believe I gave you an orderto sleep, Charles.”
